Bed Of Roses
by Icywinter
Summary: How does Loneliness mixed with laughter and love bring John Stillman and Lilly Rush together? Mild Smut in certain chapters Please R&R Completed
1. First Glances

For years he watched, yearned and waited with the impatient beats of his own heart. This man wasn't Scotty, Vera or Jefferies for that matter; but from a lonely man who sat everyday alone in his office; John Stillman. When everyone thought he was like a father figure to Lilly Rush, everyone was wrong; dead wrong. In fact John wanted to seal her warm, soft lips with his relishing that particular moment along with her.

However he felt compelled to keep these feelings down, knowing how creepy they might make Lilly feel. After all she was the type to quill up like a porcupine; guarding those secret safety walls behind her. Somehow Lilly too had changed, but to him her heart still needed love; his love. Letting out a breath, John sat back in his chair just thinking about the women that had for years been driving his heart crazy.

Upon getting up to check on his crew, regarding a case that they had just opened up; John's heart did a triple flutter as his eyes met up with two sapphire ones. For a moment he wasn't able to neither speak nor breathe but instead listened to Scotty speak about who their prime suspects were, until giving out order to all of them.

Somehow later that night, the door to his office opened before Lilly popped her head in with her usual word" Boss"?

"Close the door" speaking quietly.

Now surrounded in privacy, John then took off his glasses still pondering if he should or shouldn't tell her. After all they both were adults; with each other's fear of being rejected by someone. With his heart 

tightened up in his chest, John was about to let the words out before feeling a pair of two soft lips upon his.

Upon pulling back, Lilly got up with her face still flushed from the embarrassment. She felt completely stupid for even kissing her boss nevertheless on the lips, what would people think of her now; as a slut?

Then she felt John's hands in hers" It's okay Lil" moving a tendril of hair away from her eyes. However a moment of awkwardness came upon them until, John reached for his coat. Together the two walked into a diner before sitting down together.

While they sat there drinking some coffee, Lilly couldn't help but notice how hard her heart was pounding at this exact time. Both nervousness love had already claimed her, but then by accident spilled her whole cup of steaming hot cup of coffee all over her lap.

"Crap" she muttered trying her hardest to clean it up.

Lilly was pissed big time, for acting like such a fool in front of her boss. However John just took it as nervousness more than what she had claimed herself to be" I'll pay for it to be dry cleaned Lil" offering a simple solution.

"No Boss, I'm okay" not wanting her boss to take care of her laundry so to speak.

John then paid for their coffees, before lending Lilly his coat, in an effort to hide the embarrassment that had spilled all over both her shirt and slacks.

Upon arriving back at her apartment, Lilly let out a breath as John then faced her.

"I don't think of you any different, then before" while his eyes drowned in hers, while his hand softly stroked the softness of her cheek.

Tears then were sucked down, before very slowly their lips came together. Their kiss first started out slow, each giving them time to explore each other, moment by moment; before stopping to gaze into each other's eyes in a reassurance that this was very real.

For a second a small smile crept onto Lilly's face before deepening their kiss. John moaned softly realizing it had been a long time since he had felt this good, or been in love. Maybe this was a first time for everything, including this relationship in the works.

Breaking away, Lilly smoothed herself out before turning the key "You coming" feeling dared to let this man into her life.

"How about dinner tomorrow" John spoke quietly.

Somehow Lilly understood his shyness about not wanting to join her in bed, afraid that he probably couldn't satisfy her due to their age differences. With a certain twinkle now set in her eyes, she now forgot about the now strained clothes on her body.

"6:30 sounds fine" wanting to push work aside for him. Lilly had never once done that but this was a chance she was now willing to take.

With one kiss, John then walked off into the distance, not knowing he had just put a smile onto a certain blonde's face. However he now began to feel the romantic feelings entering the depths of his soul, for the first time in years.


	2. Midnight Confessions

By morning, Lilly had awakened with her heart full of beating romance. She couldn't help but to feel this way not after first kissing John last night. The taste of him made the beatings of her pulse quicken, needing another dose of his love quickly.

Later on after she had gotten to work, the feelings from last night caused a bit of dizziness to start. Breathing in deeply, Lilly tried to dismantle them until seeing that John was sitting in his office as in effort to conceal what had transpired last night.

It wasn't like they had sex or anything, but perhaps this relationship was new to him also. Anyhow she then found a tall cup of Triple Americano sitting on her desk.

"Thanks" she said to Scotty who seemed at lost for the compliment" I didn't buy it Lil".

Her eyes then searched his before realizing that was John who had taken the liberty to do so, but with a deep breath of confidence Lilly walked into his office and closed the door. John looked up slowly seeing the woman whom he loved so much, but wasn't used to a real relationship.

"Have something new on the case, Lil" he asked in his usual boss tone.

The blonde smiled" Surprised you didn't stay over last night" giving a grin. Taking off his glassed he knew she had indeed spotted his own nervousness" Didn't want to rush us".

Her heart immediately did a triple beat, while her senses ached to quill up fast. Unlike all the other failed relationships she didn't let her walls come up this time" So we still on for tonight, or are you going to get nervous on me"?

John then chuckled softly" What makes you think I'm nervous"?

"You're sure acting that way" adding a laugh to the conversation" So what don't I know about you" slinking over to his side of the desk.

"Find out tonight Lil" he replied looking now straight into her blue eyes. Without a single word their lips bonded like glue, for a split second. It was short but perfect in Lilly's mind, the way it was when Kite had first done that to her out in the snow.

As she got up, John continued to watch the way her hips were swaying; before she had caught him. With a smile Lilly left his office knowing that there was something special brewing between the two of them.

However later that night, six skirts were been thrown down on the bed as the blonde tried to find something to wear. Upon pulling out a long black thin strapped dress, Lilly put in on but still couldn't decided whether or not to leave it down or up. For a new record she then decided to leave it down, but curled it slightly.

Her stomach felt weak, before Lilly then threw up due to being so nervous. She had been on dates before but never felt like this; whatever it was her heart was now racing inside. Upon looking at the clock, Lilly's eyes widened before throwing on some light makeup.

From downstairs the doorbell then rang, making the blonde almost trip while running down the stairs so fast. There stood John wearing a pair of slacks and a red top, before handing her a bouquet of roses.

"I picked them up from a place near the office" feeling a little embarrassed even for someone at his age.

Her smile soften before taking them into her arms" Thanks" but when she went to retrieve a vase from the cabinet it immediately smashed on the fall.

"Crap" she muttered before John grabbed something to help her clean it up.

When the glass was finally discarded in the garbage pail, he then stood facing her, before Lilly let out a breath.

Nonetheless the two still went out to dinner, but winded up coming back to her place afterwards. There Lilly stood by the staircase awaiting him" You coming John" finally saying his first name. With a sultry walk as she then led him onto the bed, as the night droned on but she had found John wasn't still ready to have sex. Though her body was craving it badly, she then decided to rest her head down on his chest as they made small talk instead.

"Been awhile, huh" asking softly.

John chuckled at her comment," Yeah" before kissing the top of her head as he then felt her hands gently touching the scar where Ed had shot him. In his mind that wasn't what was on rewind, but just seeing her coming out on the stretcher just after being shot did.

Instead he just continued to the listen to the sound of Lilly breathing in and out, remembering him sitting there, while she lay on the bed in pain. John had never seen her this way, especially when she cried out for her now deceased mother.

At this very moment, he the paused to let out a breath" Thought that night I was going to lose you forever, you were in a lot of pain Lil".

Along with his words, Lilly's fingers touched her scar, but ceased to remember those horrifying nightmares" You did take care of me, when I got home, even cooked for me".

"That wasn't a meal, not much of a cook" added John

Lilly let out a small laugh while containing to listen to the sound of his heartbeat, now echoing inside of her ear, somehow the sound then lulled her to sleep.

By morning, John got up before moving a tendril of hair away from her face as his lips then planted a small kiss upon her porcelain skin. A delicate smile then appeared on Lilly's face as she gently pulled him closer, while the two continued kissing.

"Mmm" feeling his warm kisses, knowing that she absolutely craved for a good morning kiss. By far, this was a good start to the day. Even after he had left to go home and dress for work, Lilly was practically glowing in love.

However while on route to work, Scotty joined her like usual. While on the journey down to headquarters, he could sense that his partner was acting different; very different. Chuckling to himself, Lilly then turned seeing the expression set up the Cuban's face.

"What" as her stomach did a triple flip upon seeing John standing there at the coffee both in from of the building?

Luckily nothing strange out of the ordinary happened, but as usual John acted like the boss that he was. A good thing about dating him, he was more mature than the rest of the bozos that she had dated. However just after bringing up a box up from the warehouse, Lilly knew she couldn't resist looking at John anymore.

However what would her colleagues think of her dating their boss, but it was good thing that John had been divorced for years. Then a thought came to mind, what if the DA found out about this?

It wasn't like they were having an affair, but more of a relationship that was deemed to grow with more love and trust.


	3. Secrets and games lie ahead

From that day one, the two spent the nights together in each of their apartments, talking over wine or sharing a small bout of laughter. One night in particular, they were in the middle of watching a football game on Television when Lilly came back with a bowl of chips before being slowly pulled down onto John's lap.

It wasn't anything sexual, but more as a way for him to be closer to her. Between commercials she could feel his lips kissing her neck; before she turned to kiss him back.

"You're beautiful" he whispered" Always noticed that about you", seeing the twinkle in her eyes.

Her lips then curled into a sweet smile, before they resumed watching more of the game. It didn't take long for John to discover that, Lilly did in fact like watching football among other sports as well. However she knew practically nothing about it, but liked the fact that he was teaching her about what the players were doing.

By the end, Lilly gave a playful smile to him before sealing her lips onto his. John gently pulled her closer, while they continued kissing. His breathing quickened feeling rush of euphoria, now zooming throughout his entire body, as she then pushed him down onto the cushions of the couch.

John's hands found their way underneath her shirt, while exploring the upper portion of her body. Then he had stopped right in the area, where she had been shot. For a moment she held his hand closer to her chest, while he felt the rhythmic beatings of her heart.

"I'm fine, John" she whispered softly before getting up off of the couch.

He then followed her, before placing his coffee cup into the sink. At that point, Lilly then took down her ponytail, exposing how long her hair had gotten. John's eyes darkened from the beautiful woman that he was now staring at, although he couldn't help but to look, his heart was pounding harder inside needing more of Lilly.

Very slowly their lips came together, sharing the last kiss of the night. With a small smile, Lilly watched John's hips move as he made his way to the door, before turning back around as the two shared smiled at one another.

"Get some sleep, Lil" speaking quietly.

Lilly leaned her head against the wall" I will" giving him another smile as the door closed behind him.

Needless to say, she didn't get much sleep that night. Her heart was doing the mile a minute Olympics inside of her chest, in which it now seemed to have a mind of its own. Not even deep breathed was helping, before Lilly let her hand rest there. What she never realized is that only the truest love made her heart feel this way, and John just happened to do that.

Taking in slow, steady breaths before drifted in and out throughout the rest of the night. By 3am, Lilly just couldn't sleep, as she showered and dressed but didn't leave her apartment. No she wasn't going to head down to headquarters in the middle of the night, due to that. Besides the constant reminder of Ed that one fateful night, had kept her from being there alone.

Around 7am, just as Lilly was walking to work, John had joined her, handing an extra large Triple Americano to her.

"Rocket fuel" she added with a smile.

Together they walked but from out of the corner of Lilly's eyes, she saw her partner Scotty, with his latest girlfriend. Goosebumps began to appear on her skin, due to the fact that John was holding onto her hand.

Playing it safe, John quickly released her hand in an attempt to keep their new relationship a secret for a little while. Instead he reverted back to the case, without any odd looks from Scotty. He hadn't noticed that the two were in fact walking just a little too close, than usual.

Instead Scotty was then dragged down the street, acting like more of teenage boy in love than of an adult. Even Lilly noticed that, knowing that her own relationships had maturity to them, but this one had both love and trust, something she couldn't possibly due before. Not once did she feel like pushing John away, or vice versa.

"So who's he dating" John asked.

Lilly rolled her eyes at her partner, seeing how childish he could be at times" Don't know, but I heard she's got some pretty deep secrets of her own".

"Don't we all" chuckled John, while walking along before discovering that she was standing behind him.

"What's that supposed to mean" asking.

John's face then warmed a little bit" Nothing Lil" knowing that she probably would get him to spill out on his own secret, to his own astonishment she didn't ask.

"Fine, be secretive" she replied with a smile, while taking his hand.

Before getting to headquarters, John's eyes locked into hers, very slowly they kissed. Lilly could feel cold; cement walls directly behind her but heeded no attention. Instead her eyes closed, enjoying the euphoria of their love brewing in both of their hearts. Bit by bit, their tongues danced to an exotic song that only they were aware of, while John's hand gently caressed her cheek, lovingly.

Not aware that it was broad daylight and the fact that people could very well see them; the two were only caring about each other that that point. Lilly moaned softly into his mouth, awaking her own deepening senses of romantic love until he broke away, still kissing her soft lips.

By now Lilly's face glowed with redness; a curse of her pale skin. Even John had seemed to be a tad bit breathless from this, but neither of them could speak for a few minutes, but just took in each other's eyes.

"How about you actually take me to a game" speaking after that pause, while her eyes continuing to looking into his.

John chuckled, before pulling out two tickets" Already have, wasn't going to tell you until later. You know how certain people can get".

After putting them away, the two snapped into their professional as Vera made his way over to them. Of course he was wearing the same shirt as yesterday, but so was Scotty.

"You two go to bed together" joked Lilly.

Scotty let out a breath" Nah, just didn't have time" now sporting a small beard.

To her he looked every creepier, but soon after the two men went into the building, Lilly felt John squeezing her hand.


	4. Eagles Game

For a moment their eyes locked together, but they didn't kiss. Though she wanted a taste of him one more time, before work this wasn't the most appropriate time to do so. Once inside Kat was criticizing Scotty over his beard which made him more self conscious about himself.

"What's up with you sporting that Armadillo look" asked Jefferies as he grinned to himself. Being the type that watched only sports or dumb drama, he hadn't had a clue to what the older man had been speaking about.

However Lilly didn't focus her attention on the fact her partner, had a serial killer look to him. She came here to give her victims a voice, but was finally glad that there was now a break in the case. While informing John about the boyfriend of the victims on his whereabouts, she couldn't help but to feel a certain type of sexiness around him.

Being the fact that Lilly was in a work environment, her eyes remained glued to the paper instead of on John whom her heart now truly loved. Instead she informed him and left, while tapping Scotty on the shoulder as the two left to interview the former boyfriend.

Once in the car, Scotty glanced over seeing that his partner was acting very differently lately" Who's the guy Lil"?

"Don't have one" she replied, still keeping her relationship with John a secret. Not even Scotty would be able to pry this one out of Lilly for some time, but even he had wondered who was making his partner so happy and calm.

After coming back with absolutely nothing, Lilly was filled with stress and determination to catch this killer. By 7pm, John came out of his office noticing how hard his girl had been working. For years now he had seen this but even she needed to go home and let her mind refresh a bit.

He then moved closer" Work on it tomorrow, can't stay here all night".

Much to his surprise, Lilly then stood up "I'm not, getting tired" while cranking out the stiffness in her neck. The two continued walking, as John felt the rain beginning to come down. This time he let Lilly back to his place, taking off her coat. Without a single word his hands began to massage her back, working out the knots that were causing her pain.

Lilly moaned softly before John led her into his bedroom, which was modest a clean. In fact she expected this coming from him, but was instructed to lay flat on her stomach. Using the lotion that he had just bought, John warmed it up in his hands before rubbing it all over Lilly's pale back.

"John" she whispered, enjoying this wonderful well needed back massage.

Much to her own surprise, he also massaged the back of her neck as well. She craved this so much, but now the stress from the case was going out of her head for now, that is. However after the massage he then ordered in some pizza as the two watched some TV together, Lilly liked the fact that this wasn't a rushed type of relationship

In fact both could act like themselves, with no judgments being passed. They were both far from being perfect, in relationship terms that is. Like in all relationships there were both ups and downs, but the two were trying to balance both out.

However Lilly still saw the shyness about John, regarding sex. She wanted to make him comfortable about it, but knew the more they were together; the more comforted he'd probably would feel later on. After eating several slices of pizza, she then snuggled closure to him while watching an episode of a crime show in Tru TV; very typical of John.

"How about we watch something that isn't crime related" speaking with a small smile.

John chuckled softly, before she flipped through the channels before settling for reality TV. Almost instantly he couldn't figure out what was going on, but noticed how Lilly was enjoying it. Wrapping his arms around her, he went with the flow until seeing that his girl was calm and content.

"She's got something to hide" pointing that the annoying blonde girl, yelling about something.

Lilly's lips formed into a smile" Can't you just watch it without, getting into their mind. I think sometimes you had forgotten about life in reality".

Sharing a laugh with her "Guess I don't get out much".

" You are with me" flashing that dazzling smile of hers" Just don't get into the mind's of the football players tomorrow night, leave work at the office".

John chuckled while taking a sip of his beer" Look who's talking" before seeing a pair of blue eyes looking right at him. Leaning over she then kissed him, until the commercials were over "Hand me that report of her in the morning" making him laugh even more.

Moments after she had left, John knew that Lilly was right. He rarely had a life or what he presumed to be one; instead he felt differently when she was around. Call it whatever you life, but tomorrow night he would keep his promise not to talk about work.

It was just their luck that the stadium for the Philly Eagles was crowded. This was supposed to be the biggest games of the season, making Lilly feel extremely lucky to be part of this. John had gotten great seats, which enabled both of them to see all the action. Around kickoff time, she too joined the crowd of excitement.

As the ball flew, Lilly cheered them on, letting her fun side experience happiness as well. Even John was immersed in this game, since he had a vast knowledge about sports. Throughout the whole entire game, the two were sitting closely together feeling the rush of wanting their team to win, even though she was merely a Giants fan secretly at heart.

However right by the end, the Eagles scored a touchdown which was too incredible for their team. As the team went ballistic with cheers, both Lilly and John shared a small tender kiss together. Maybe it was luck or merely fate but whatever it was the two knew that their love for each other was growing at a slow and loving pace.

Once in the car, they both were talking about the touchdown. Lilly was merely arguing over the fact that one of the players also lost the ball to the other team, but after ten minutes of bantering John let it go and became quiet.

"Say it, already" seeing how he remained silent.

John shook his head" Bring in the paper and we'll settle this" before they shared a small kiss. It had seemed to be the perfect end to a good night out.

However once back at her place, he took off his shirt exposing a white tank top, knowing that they were just going to sleep, and left it on before going underneath the silk sheets; before Lilly reemerged from the bathroom wearing a black lace negligee.

He watched how Lilly slinked across the room, before getting into bed. Leaning over she then kissed him "night".

"Night Lil" he whispered before watching his love falling asleep. Halfway through the night, Lilly somehow shifted onto his chest, and remained there until morning. By that time she awoke to find John still fast asleep in bed, to her he looked so peaceful yet at the same time handsome.

Glancing over at the clock, she knew that him being a captain of their squad he should have already been there. Leaning over Lilly gently started kissing him, trying her best to wake him up. With her sexiness sweeping over her, but knew that the two would be late if that indeed happened.

By the forth kiss, John awoke pulling her down for a couple more. His heart was beginning feel the love that was coming through from Lilly, in fact he welcomed it. After a few more, she broke away, before peering down into his eyes" So we are going to settle this"?

His smile warmed" Alright be secretive, just don't blame me when your late for work" as John got up, to kiss her once more before leaving.

Luckily, John had beaten Lilly to work, only to find out that he was incredibly early not late as she had told him. However just four minutes later she came in carrying two cups of coffee on a tray" Thought you might like some, along with this" waving a rolled up newspaper.

As Lilly opened it her eyes lit up" I was right" before John snatched it out of her hand. In fact she was very right" I could cook you dinner, tonight at my place".

"Sounds like a plan" she replied before starting her day, continued to solve this case.


	5. This Magic Moment

- **Might be a couple of days before I can post another chapter, got some new parts for my computer so I'm going to be reinstalling everything this weekend. I'll try to sneak another one tommorrow, If I can. Thanks as always for the reviews, I do enjoying writing this story a lot; like I do all the rest of my work **

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The thought of having someone cooking her dinner, made Lilly's heart do a triple beat. She had never had someone do that before, but the feeling was clearly making her feel incredibly romantic. Just about everyone around her knew that she had been in a daze for now a week, but none of the men knew what was up.

At that point, Jefferies looked over" Got anything to share with us, Lil"? When she saw the grinning look scattered upon his face, she denied seeing someone.

Then Scotty then picked up the newspaper, which had been open to the sports section" Since when do you read about sports"?

"Enough" snatching the paper out of his hands, feeling slightly tired of her partner's constant criticism. However today wasn't looking too good, since that certain redheaded ADA was under all of their skins about something. This also went for John whose mind was currently on Lilly, whom was busying herself with the case.

After she had gone into the interrogation room, the men all look at each other.

"Looks like Lil went to the Eagles game last night" pointing to the article, with a picture of a very excited Lilly Rush next to another fan.

Scotty snatched it out of Vera's grubby hands, before Lilly stood there realizing that the men were looking at photo of her in the newspaper.

"Give me that" taking it into her own hands, but luckily John wasn't in the photo; concealing their relationship even further.

The men were all grinning at her" So who took you to the game"?

"Save it" snapping at them.

During the day, Lilly was pretty sick of yelling after multiple suspects who had gotten in her face. It was at the point that John knew that she probably wasn't going to be in the mood to eat, after all of this had ended. Despite everything after work, Lilly stopped back at home to change into a pair of jeans and a top, before heading on over to his place.

There the smell of aroma, made her stomach growl even more as the two exchanged several kisses. With one motion, Lilly sat down as John poured each of the some wine. On the couch, they sipped some wine while she let it calm her nerves from the day.

"Nice job, you did with the suspect" seeing her blue eyes gazing up at him.

With a sweet smile, Lilly playfully moved closer" No more work, _John_" while kissing the sides of his neck. He then turned, while his lips brushed hers over and over again until John leaped up, due to something burning in the oven.

Their dinners had now been ruined completely, as John turned to throw up the now burnt food. Though he could hear the sound of Lilly's stomach growling; he felt bad about being a part lousy cook.

"Sorry" came an apology" Can't cook that great".

Lilly understood but was kind of let down, as her stomach let out more noises from within.

"Shouldn't have promised you that ", John whispered quietly while he cleaned up the kitchen" Can leave if you want to".

Was it because of this, that he simply felt that he was no good? Anyways Lilly wasn't about to give up on them for any type of reason, even if their dinner had been burnt down to a crisp. Instead she then helped him clean up some more; realizing that he too thought his own flaws would make him a less of a person.

"I burn things, also" said Lilly, reminiscing about the time she had burnt pancakes while dating Joseph. She too felt so disappointment but knew that in this situation he tried too much" How about we cook someone together"?

"Don't feel like telling the fire Marshall about this one" chuckled John.

With a smile on her face, and the spark of love in the area, Lilly then tossed in a bottle of Olive Oil" as the two tried to cook up something good. However the two surprisingly made a descent meal, although it didn't taste that great, it was start.

Taking another sip of her red wine, Lilly put it down while collecting the plates as her hips swayed to the beat of the music. Incredibly, she felt extremely sexy by a man who made her feel this way. It didn't matter about their big age difference or the fact that they both had two different personalities, the truth was: they loved each other despite everything.

Upon taking his hand, Lilly dimmed the lights as they began to dance slowly" What, you can't dance or what"?

Chuckling softly, as the two continued dancing together; but by morning John had awoken to see Lilly still very much fast asleep. Though they were both dressed, he knew that she wouldn't wake up feeling any embarrassment. Sure enough she did awaken, to find his eyes staring into hers.

"Watching me" asking with a dreamy smile

John then ten drily moved strand of hair away from her face, before kissing Lilly's forehead. Her fingers traced circles around his chest.

Next Lilly sat up giving yet another kiss, before pushing John onto his back. This time he didn't allow his shyness to come through any longer. Instead he breathed out feeling her tender lips kissing him, while her hips started rocking slowly.

One by one, John then wrapped both of his hands around her while a surge of arousement flowed began to surround him.

"Lil" whispering softly, while he planted soft kisses on her neck, then shoulder.

Giving him a small moan; she then lifted up her shirt. John breathed out harder seeing her pale, but beautiful soft skin poised right in front of him. Being still a gentleman, he resumed kissing a trail down her spinal column.

"John" came a gasp, while Lilly moaned even more feeling the exotic sensation that had only came when it was from love. This was one of the rare moments she'd ever feel this: beautiful, sexy, romantic and happy. Clearly being with John had caused all of these sensations to emerge at once.

As the buds from the bed of roses began slowly to open, the two now naked gazed up into each other's eyes. Without exchanging any words, their hips grinded together slowly as if this was a new thing in their relationship; which it was.

Beat by beat, breaths by breaths, the two climaxed in the bed of roses. It wasn't long afterwards that Lilly was once again resting her head on John's chest, while he continued holding her. She knew this relationship wasn't all about this, but something even deeper than that.

"So where's that place, that had that great port" referring to his love of boats and fishing" Maybe you can teach me".

John's laughter was soft" Got a buddy in Florida, haven't done it in years. Could call him" seeing the playful smile now scattered upon Lilly's face.


	6. Miami Beach

** I'm back, my computer is now fixed so there will be more chapters to come. **

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However once the news had spread that both, John and Lilly were taking a vacation everyone in the squad seemed puzzled by this. In fact Scotty was beginning to worry a bit about his partner lately, worrying if this guy was becoming controlling over her whole life; or what he had perceived this to be.

This simply wasn't the case, from the very start of their relationship; John would never control any aspect of Lilly's life. In fact he never got angry or upset, if she had wanted an evening all to herself. Besides that John wasn't the type of guy who was controlling or manipulative, but one who could understand and see her for whole she was.

As for their little vacation together was concerned, Lilly just happened to be the first one out of work that evening to go shopping. However a little shopping indolence sent her overboard with the aspect of buying way too much stuff; which added to her own excitement.

What she wasn't expecting was a road trip via by car; not airplane. Somehow that morning, John did most of the driving while Lilly; whom was still not quite awake sat there sipping her coffee. Though it was still very early in the morning, he didn't let that stop him from making their journey to Florida. However he kept on looking over at a certain blonde woman; feeling happy that she was coming along with him.

John then took Lilly's left hand into his; holding onto it protectively. By mid morning she had fully awaken by the sound of the rain beating down on the windshield, mixing with the sound of sports radio.

Very typical of him, but all in all at least it wasn't nearly as bad as her partner's music. While glancing over, her back starting to hurt from sitting in the same position for hours

.

"Ever think of stopping soon" asking softly, by now Lilly had become very hungry. Also she needed another cup of coffee, but the rain was still coming down hard.

As the car moved into another lane, John passed by several rest stops but didn't stop. He was the type that didn't like to do that; only if he had needed a gas refill but nothing else. However that had been nearly an hour ago; and John didn't have the heart to wake Lilly up from a deep sleep.

While reading several directions, Lilly then noticed that the two were now lost. The directions had stated to stay on I-95 south but he wasn't on that highway at all, but on another stretch road.

"Get back on to I-95 John, think you're going in the wrong direction" seeing nothing but woods for miles.

When John realized that he had turned off the main highway, he then turned around heading back onto I-95 south, but medially slammed into heavy traffic. He then remembered about all the construction that had been going on recently, but then seeing two flashing blue lights up ahead the two knew there was also an accident.

"Great" sighed Lilly, as she then let out a breath...

John felt stupid, but didn't want this to ruin their first vacation together. Besides they both were in need of one; as his hand gently rubbed the middle of Lilly's soft back.

"We'll stop, I promise" hearing her stomach letting out a loud growl" don't want you to starve", before pressing his lips to her cheek.

As the traffic picked up slightly, Lilly then noticed that her cell was blinking with her partner's number on it. Groaning slightly, she then turned off her phone wanting to spend the entire vacation without being bothered about a single case.

When his phone rang, John saw the looked displayed on hers before turning his phone off. Besides the call wasn't important, since it was just a text message displaying sports scores anyway, that immediately made Lilly grin.

"You actually get them texted to your phone" asking seductively?

John chuckled" Don't have time to read the paper" while stepping lightly on the gas pedal" Haven't had too much of a real life".

The blonde nodded but for the rest of the car trip, things went well besides the fact that Lilly drove the rest of the way there. Normally she would just let him drive but felt compelled to do something other than sitting and sleeping all day, car rides to her were usually boring.

By the time they had reached Florida, it was towards sundown since she had taken a wrong turn while going through Georgia. By the time they had gotten to Miami Beach, both of them were dead tired from 

the trip. Nevertheless, their hotel room overlooked the beach; while changed into more comfortable clothes.

Once outside, Lilly now decked out in a summer dress while John in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt walked the streets of Miami while breathing in some of the warm weather. To her she felt like the luckiest woman in the world just by being with him, regardless of their age difference.

After settling for a plain restaurant, the two ate together in silence as John noticed several men staring at Lilly. What would he say; Lilly was beautiful in each which way; beside the fact that her long hair hung down like a pure sheet of gold.

"Got three men looking at you", speaking quietly to her.

The blonde smiled" Doesn't matter" touching his hand, "I'm with you" with love in both them voice and eyes. She didn't care about the men whom were probably still staring at her, but only had eyes for John.

Even after getting back to their room, John automatically sat on the couch watching the game while Lilly was changing into a pair of shorts and a tube top. When she came out, his eyes gazed down at her long legs" You are beautiful, Lil".

"Want to show me" batting her eyes at him" _John_"?

Leading him into the bedroom, John then surprised her by pushing Lilly down onto the soft bed while his tongue roamed feverishly inside of hers. A moan vibrated into his, causing him to respond as Lilly pulled him downward needing him as this very given second.

Giving the circumstances from driving all day, the two decided to hold off of having sex since they both had a big day at sea tomorrow. That night Lilly slept amazingly well, especially while sharing the bed with someone she loved so much, as she then continued to count the beats of his heart.

By early morning, the two then walked down to the dock together; where John had rented a boat for the whole day. In her eyes, Lilly felt a sense of calmness while breathing in the sea air, even the sound of seagulls brought forward a welcoming relief.

As the boat then charted out to sea, Lilly now wearing a bikini top and shorts was sitting next to him, enjoying the breeze running through her long blonde hair.

" Thought you said, you had a friend here" before catching on that it was John's way, of getting Lilly to come along with him for a vacation" Or did you not want to go alone"?

John's smile warmed, before finding an area as the boat then stopped. He then moved over to get a fishing pole, handing one to Lilly" Going to teach you how to fish".

However that proved to be fun, especially since John was now shirtless with only his shorts on. He too felt younger around Lilly, but never once pretended to act her age. He knew that she loved him for who he was, and changing himself wasn't going to simple happen. Besides they had a complete understanding over each other, and didn't want to change who they both really were inside.

His thoughts then subsided when Lilly had felt a pull, while wheeling it in her had caught very well indeed a fish. It was pretty big, but John saw right away how she had compassion for even a fish dangles by its mouth.

"It's a pretty big one Lil" before snapping a photo of it" Will and I never had caught one quite like that before".

After the fish was thrown back into the water, Lilly then wrapped her arms around him" When was the last time that you two had gone fishing together"?

"Six years ago" making her laugh softly" You telling me that it's been exactly that long"?

Turning softly, John then gazed up into two blue orbs before their lips came together, softly. With the wind sweeping against their backs, Lilly felt a surge of more romance entering her own heart.

Not long after, while John continued fishing; Lilly now fully in her bikini lay back in the warm Florida sun; enjoying a little piece of heaven. Of course she had one the highest level of SPF; due to her pale skin but then pouring the sky opened up as rain came down on the two" Be over quickly, these quick storms don't last like they do in Philly" reassuring Lilly.

Somehow the storm did go away, as the sun came out drying up all the evidence. However John still was planning a romantic night out on the water together.

* * *

**Nobody knows still that that the two are in love or taking a vacation together, but will Scotty be the first to find out? I promise that Lilly will not get pregnant any time soon, trying to avoid that subject complelety. **


	7. Dancing in showers of love

At nightfall, the stars were shimmering the sky with glows of lights while the tide remained calm like the two heart beats on the boat above

While a breeze ran through Lilly's hair, she took in several long deep breaths; seeing that life wasn't all sad and lonely; but indeed full of mystery and hope. Then as John's arms wrapped around her waist as he too took in the full array of both the stars and moon; realizing that he had finally had found someone that was right for him.

Sure it had taken quite awhile, being together right here on this boat said something about how they had both felt about each other. Clearly only their hearts spoke; not their own voices. While breaths disappeared into the air; Lilly then felt his lips kissing love into her porcelain skin as it was the sucked down into her beating heart.

Then he stopped as they continued breathing together; as the stars began to shin even more brilliantly in the night sky. Without another word, John then led her into the middle of the boat as music began to play softly. As the two of them danced in the moonlight; Lilly had never seen such a romantic side to him; but enjoyed the fact that John was taking their newly found relationship at a slow pace.

While swaying to the music, Lilly felt extremely lucky to have fallen in love with someone that truly care both emotionally and physically about her. As she danced with John, the roses of love began to set its bloom; filling both of their hearts up with love.

As the CD then stopped; their lips met consuming each other's taste; before tiny droplets of rain fell out of the clouds from up above. Not wanting to be soaked; John the steered the boat back to the dock before helping Lilly off of the boat. Upon taking his hand; as they made their way to the hotel.

Once in the bedroom; John then lowered the lovely blonde onto the bed as he made his ascent down her body; showing them with his kisses. This time; he wasn't going to let his own shyness peak through as his fingers soon discarded her bikini top.

Lilly was in absolute pleasure; feeling the heightened sense of both sexiness and passion sweeping into her body; like a hurricane. Once he had slid into of her; she moaned while their kiss deepened. No one had even made her feel quite like this before, as John continued his motions enjoying the erotic sense that it was giving him.

However he then grinded his hips, harder against hers causing Lilly to become extremely vocal. Her breathing hardened; while being saturated with John's lips. As he began to push his girl over the edge; she gasped over and over feeling more pleasure erupting. This only made the speed increase so much so that they both ended up coming together; while they flew into a wonderland filled with pleasure.

Upon open up her eyes, Lilly's breath was still very fast "John", managing to speak his name.

However John was panting due to the extreme pleasure that he had just received; but knew this was someone that he hadn't enjoyed for quite some time. Upon turning over, his lips then kissed the side of her cheek.

"You are beautiful" his voice speaking in a whisper, while resting his head down on her chest. As John heard the rapid beatings from Lilly's heart; he was thankful everyday that she was alive and with him." Heart's racing"

Lilly's lips curled into a slight smile" What's it sound like" a questing she had often wondered about, if in fact her own heart had been damaged from all the pain that it had suffered throughout her whole life.

However that question wasn't revealed, as John kept on listening to it. In a way that sound reminded him of life and love; especially when it was beating from inside of Lilly's chest. Perhaps he too was seeing things a different way; after they both had started to date.

Rolling back onto his side of the bed, John tenderly moved a piece of hair away from her eyes.

"Did it sound broken" she asked; if afraid somehow that it was.

His smile was soft "No" peering up into two blue orbs" Sounds like you" planting another kiss on her chest.

Lilly's eyes were now sleepy; but knew she could share things with him; and know that John would never tell another soul about it. Before she had fallen asleep that night, she heard him whisper something that made her heart do a triple beat.

"I love you, Lil" was the words that were no longer meant to scare her. In fact Lilly felt the same way but just couldn't get it out of her mouth; since she had just fallen asleep.

However John remained awake, watching Lilly's chest rising and falling; in wonder to what she was dreaming about. For the longest time he had being asking himself that very same question but maybe those were some secrets that Lilly would never tell.

Very slowly he then joined her as well in dreamland, while continuing to hold her closer to him.

By morning the warm sunshine had peeked through the blinds; awaking Lilly. Feeling both refreshed and content, she glanced over at John whom was still very much in a deep sleep. After giving him a kiss; Lilly dressed and headed down to the shore to take a short stroll.

The cool breeze, gave Lilly a sense of calmness and hope that her present day life wasn't all filled with sadness but one that now included romance. Being with John was indeed the right choice; but her own happiness came within her own self.

Walking along the shore, she then felt the coolness of the water splashing on her bare feet. Lilly then looked across the horizon; as a deep breath raced into her lungs filling them with crisp ocean air. She felt alive, and content; perhaps the beach was probably the only place that had kept her feeling relaxed.

Remembering her now sleeping man back at the hotel, Lilly went back only to discover that John was still in fact very much asleep; before she then began to kiss him softly.

To her surprise, John remained sleeping as Lilly stood outside on the balcony sipping some of her coffee. Having a vacation away from Philly was well in need; but this was a place that she never thought had existed. Anyways the aching to just lie down on a beach chair and take in the warm Miami sunshine was starting to flow through her veins.

About an hour later, Lilly then saw him decked out in what looked like Golf apparel" Didn't know that you played"?

"Every once and awhile" knowing that this wasn't something that she'd would enjoy" I could teach you, if you want".

With a sly smile, Lilly moved several strands of hair away from her face" You didn't even listen to me when I tried to teach you how to use a computer, think Vera's probably pissed at you".

" He'll get over it" chuckled John" How about I hit the courses and you join me later" before seeing her taking a golf ball in her hands" How about now, or is your friend going to join you"?

Somehow the golf course wasn't that far from the hotel, as John tried his best to teach Lilly how to play. Of course she wasn't as good, but this wasn't her kind of sport. When another group of men his age joined him, Lilly then decided to head down to the beach.

Normally she never thought once about her body, but then there were those men that would stare at her. She ignored the comments, knowing that she wasn't the most beautiful one out there; but was glad that her own body was healthy. Lilly wasn't too thin but slender; but perhaps people had noticed just how white her skin was.

She didn't care; this was who she was but still felt a tiny bit insecure about the scar from the shooting. Just as Lilly was about to cover up, John then took the towel away" Doesn't make you damaged Lil" knowing her own insecure" I was shot also, but doesn't change who we are".

"Changes everything" Lilly mumbled she felt his hand resting on the scar.

John could understand, given the circumstances of her own childhood" We're now here together" taking her hand" I don't even notice it anymore, still very beautiful to me" his eyes now looking straight into hers.

Upon giving her a kiss, John then took her hand as the two went into the water together. Somehow when a wave had splashed Lilly, she then let out laughter while her now long blonde hair was now sopped.

As they then shared yet another satisfying kiss, Lilly had now forgotten about her scar and the shooting. In fact their vacation was now beginning to heat up, but had no idea where he was going to take her for dinner and dancing.

When she had found out later that night, Lilly was shocked that John had gotten reservations for a very expensive restaurant. Once inside her breathing had literally stopped, taking in the beauty of the place. It was immaculate with usual design that she never had seen before. The smell of the food, well added to the mixture of love and romance.


	8. The nightlife of Miami Beach

When she had found out later that night, Lilly was shocked that John had gotten reservations for a very expensive restaurant. Once inside her breathing had literally stopped, taking in the beauty of the place. It was immaculate with usual design that she never had seen before. The smell of the food, well added to the mixture of love and romance.

Inside Salsa music was playing in the background, while the two sat down together looking over both of their menus. However Lilly's attention focused on everything else but that, for she never quite expected anyone to have taken her out to such a lavish upscale restaurant.

Anyways as the band played on, Lilly watched as people danced on the floor. Everything was perfect right; well almost everything. After the waiter had served them their drinks, she immediately sipped down her martini until realizing that it was John's Bloody Mary; which had made her cough violently.

worried now that someone might had seen her doing that, Lilly then excused herself to the bathroom before splashing cold water onto her face. Drawing in a single breath, she then pulled herself together then rejoined John back at their table.

Much to her own surprise, an apple martini was sitting there as Lilly nervously sipped it. This however proved to be just way too strong for her, before she settled for just water.

"Nice place" she commented, not wanting to ruin their dinner together.

John too looked around" Thought you might enjoy something different, Lil. Sorry about the drinks".

She knew that he was being plainly a gentleman, but also knew that he still wasn't used of dating yet. Having sex last night, Lilly could in fact tell that John had gotten over his bedroom shyness but everything else he was working hard to improve at. However at times, she would be the person to first make conversation; not him. That was usual for John whom was a Lieutenant but perhaps it was better to be a man who didn't brag or think too much of himself.

Sure he could joke and be carefree, but John liked to take her out on the town. However Lilly enjoyed every single moment while any thought of work never came into mind. Yes Miami Beach seemed to be making Lilly calm and serene, as she sat there listening to the band now playing some Cuban music.

"Care to dance with me" Lilly asked" Or do I have to drag you"?

Taking his hand, she then led him out onto the dance floor. What John didn't realize is that Lilly loved dancing; especially how her whole face lit up. She was merely a goddess while he twirled her around, before being dipped. As her long blonde hair fell backward, John peered into two blue orbs seeing that special twinkle that he adored so much.

While resuming dancing together, Lilly laughed softly while enjoying the high light of feeling like the luckiest woman in the world. In her eyes she truly felt this way; but perhaps letting the past go was a good thing after all. She couldn't do anything to change the past, however just living in the moment made her feel happy and light.

There wasn't a single trace of work on her mind; since it was now running with blank thoughts. As the music then slowed, the two made their way back to their table to eat. Not surprisingly they were having a candlelight dinner outside; underneath both the moon and stars. They weren't on the ground floor either; but on a balcony that overlooked a Pond.

"Didn't have to do this" Lilly whispered while digging into her salad.

John's hand then touched hers" You deserve it, I'm glad we're together" his eyes now filling with more love.

She took also saw it, knowing that this relationship was only going to get better; not worse like all the other failed ones. With a small smile, Lilly resumed eating while a cool Miami breeze blew lightly around her. However she never felt compelled to turn on her cell and check up on the case; in which she knew nothing about.

Lilly made a point to just relax without interference, besides John was right. It had been a long time quite possibly even more; since she could ever do this. Come to think about it, she probably never had a time; work, taking care of her mother. As that thought reentered her mind; Lilly began to refocus herself being here not on the past.

When the fork had dropped, John then stood there holding out his hand. While they danced slowly, her heart kept a steady beat with his. With a small exhilaration of breath, she took in the scent of his cologne while dancing to their of rhythm of their love.

Then their eyes met up, as John's lips slowly touched hers. After the third time his was on hers, but this kiss was much better than the one with Kite. For she knew that her heart could only beat that way, only when John was kissing hers; in a way it signaled a sign of a very true love.

"You are beautiful" he said, now speaking in a soft voice" I like you this way" eying her summer dress. Lilly smiled as she got her purse" Don't tell you, you already paid"?

Taking her hand, she knew all too well that John was clearly treating her. Miami Beach nightlight was now in full bloom however the two, then decided to take a long walk on the shore together. As their two barefooted feet felt the coolness of the tides waters, Lilly took in a deep breath knowing that if she would have died; she would have missed some of the things that were beautiful to her.

Facing each other, John then captured her lips again" I love you"

"I love you too" now not being afraid to tell someone that, normally those three words, sent waves of quills that were ready to poke up and guard those fortress walls. This time Lilly knew it was love and that she did in fact love him.

Out of the blue, John then scooped her up bridal style as he carried her along the shore. Her laughter echoed with delight, but the combination between the breeze and being in his hands created more roses in both of their hearts.

By the time they had gotten up to the stairs, Lilly rested her head on his shoulder ; still watching the tide going in and out while had seemed to match each breath of hers she had taken.

"Never realized how peaceful the water really is, could have died not ever knowing the quietness that it brings" pausing to let out a breath" Makes me feel calm, you know".

As John listened he understood what she meant, knowing that this shooting did effect her whole life, but he knew she had recovered from it" I couldn't forgive myself if I had lost you that day"

Their hands were together like glue, but Lilly knew she could open up and know that he would never think any less of her" Wasn't your fault; I did remember you doing that. You first told me that you loved me".

"Still do Lil" kissing her hair" That's why I took care of you when came home".

Lilly let out a sigh, while watching a seagull swooping downward before flying away. Life was going on, but she too had also moved onward with her own life. Like the social worker had said, take inventory of your life; which Lilly had done.

Combined with her new outlook on life, she also had a great man whom now had a special place in her heart.

"Thought I almost saw the light, how bright it was at the end. For a moment everything went quiet, my mother was standing by my side. It was like her telling me to hold on, that I can make it".

His hand was gently rubbing the small of her back, knowing that Lilly still in fact missed her own mother; despite her drinking habits. John remained silent while continuing to listen, knowing that it good that she was getting this off of her chest.

However Lilly then quickly stopped, not wanting to ruin their vacation together. Besides she was enjoying herself, and not wanting to go home and face work all too soon. As another couple walked along the shore; the two of them watched while their thoughts just lingered in both the crystal clear air.

By the time they had gotten back to the hotel, Lilly turned on the water to the whirlpool tub wanting to further indulge herself. After lighting several candles, she then slipped into the warm water enjoying the tranquility of both peace and quiet.

While situated in the bath, Lilly's eyes opened to find John handing her a glass of white wine. This also added to the mix, before he then closed the door behind. After applying a facial mask onto her face, she lay back and began to do some meditation.

By the time that Lilly had opened her eyes, she felt a million times better. That and giving herself a facial was one of the ways, which helped her to relax. Upon coming out of the bathroom, she saw John asleep on the couch with the ten O' clock news playing while a remote resting on his chest.

Leaning downward her lips then briefly touched his, before draping a blanket over him. However their vacation only was getting better.


	9. Case number One: Bad Sunburn and a Flu

When she had found out later that night, Lilly was shocked that John had gotten reservations for a very expensive restaurant. Once inside her breathing had literally stopped, taking in the beauty of the place. It was immaculate with usual design that she never had seen before. The smell of the food, well added to the mixture of love and romance.

Inside Salsa music was playing in the background, while the two sat down together looking over

With every new relationship comes trying out new things, water skiing was one of the things that Lilly dared herself to try out. However as she rode on the waves; a series of laughter erupted. She never felt this free or happy before, but literally had no clue about the sunburn that would prove to be a bad one.

However John wasn't nearly as much interested in doing this, but sat back to watch his girl enjoying herself on their first vacation together. In fact it didn't take very long before he had joined her; against his own will on the Miami waters. Pretty soon he too liked the idea of water skiing but not nearly as much as Lilly was.

For she found it to be the most fun thing she had ever done in her entire life. Just because John wasn't into it, didn't once cause her to stop doing it. In fact Lilly continued treading on the waves, until noon. By that time, she was red as a lobster.

"You run out of sunscreen"

Lilly knew this wasn't healthy, especially with her pale complexion" Forgot the bottle back at the hotel", silently cursing underneath her breath. Why all the days to forget this, when she knew how horrible it felt to actually have one.

Nevertheless, there were no stops made at the hotel as the couple made their way back to the beach. Incredibly both Lilly and John lay back; taking in the hot Miami sun. As much as this felt good, she then saw him listening to a small portable radio.

" Listening to the sports radio, again" taking it away" We're on Vacation remember" before realizing that he had been listening to police dispatches " Not cops here" touching his hand.

John gave a smile as he then proceeded to put it away, before getting up to go and buy them both a cold bottle of water. While gone, Lilly lounged back wanting to just stay here for a very long time; this vacation to her was like pure heaven.

Upon coming back his eyes stared at the blonde in a black bikini, but noticed just how beautiful she truly was. In a way he felt lucky to even get a chance with her; but perhaps this was merely fate that had brought the two together.

After sharing a bottle of water, Lilly then got up as she took a dip to cool off her body; while ignoring the stares of the adolescent men standing behind her. It made her think of both Vera and Scotty's own immaturity to these things, but upon turning around John lay back still listening to that damn walkman.

Well perhaps John has his own little quirks that she couldn't change; getting his mind away from work was another unsolved one. However the topic of work wasn't on Lilly's mind, since landing in Miami Beach. Yes getting out her own skin for awhile proved to be a good thing.

Back in Philly, Vera was on his own little rampage about where both John and Lilly had gone on Vacation. In the midst he was practically driving everyone around himself insane. As both he and Scotty tossed a football around, Kat stood there not amused.

"You two not going to do any work until Boss gets back" she asked, eying the two men carefully.

Vera shrugged" Not like Boss to not answer his phone, keep on getting voicemail"

"Same with Lil", exhaled Scotty from across the room "No sign of her at her apartment, like she vanished. Think she's back with what's his face"?

Upon entering the room, Jefferies wasn't into playing around. In fact he hated filling in for John with a passion, but didn't like the fact that both Valens and Vera weren't actually doing any real police work. After handing them both a case, he ignored their immature comments but still wondered where John had gone off to.

After all they were close friends, but why was John exactly being so secretive over this? Jefferies continued question several possible theories but couldn't pinpoint as to why, for now he had to keep a stern watch on the two; still tossing the football around.

"Did I not make myself clear" taking the football away" Do your jobs, stop acting like kids".

With that said, Scotty then let out a breath "Sure Tombstone" grinning at Jefferies whom by now had stern look displayed on his face.

If that wasn't enough, back in Miami Beach; Lilly was busying herself by playing beach volleyball. She was fine with the age difference between them but why was John being so difficult about trying out newer things?

She could spend hours coming up with theories but didn't, Lilly was more focused on playing the game and socializing. For once in her entire life, she let herself live a little. Work could wait, but having fun was also important to her as well.

That is until John had left the beach, Lilly had no clue as to why. Was it at all possible that he felt simply too old or was this not his thing. Whatever it was she continued to play in the warm hot sand taking in life's happiest pleasures.

Upon returning, Lilly was practically sunburned so badly that it alarmed John. In fact he grew concerned over her being like this. As he gently undid the top of her suit, he could see how red her normally pale skin had become.

"Got too much sun Lil" before hearing her moan in pain upon sitting down.

Being burnt all over wasn't such a good idea, as John began rubbing cold Aloe Vera all over. Lilly winced in pain from this but felt the coolness of the Aloe now penetrating her skin. It didn't dull the fire that had been flaring up all over her body.

That conquest hit the very next morning, when Lilly awoke in miserable pain. Her body was practically on fire" Stop" yelling loudly at him.

John knew that having a sunburn wasn't fun at all, but hated to break the news about returning back home. When that news broke, Lilly groaned especially sitting on the plane feeling miserable. Just their luck, the plane would be experiencing bad turbulence.

With bad sunburn, and bumps in the air she felt even sicker than previous. That and the sound of John snoring next to her didn't at all help. How could he possibly be sleeping through this, but now she was also feeling like she was coming down with either the flu or bad cold.

After a brief stopover, the plane finally had landed in Philadelphia before the two then both departed back to their own apartments. By now Lilly practically collapsed down on her bed, drifting into a very deep sleep.

On the other hand, John had to watch his grandson; Sean for two whole days. Though he was already school age; Sean was already bugging him about going outside to play in the snow. Long flight and short vacation didn't exactly help with his lack of energy but john had seemed to make it through; swimmingly.

Just two days later, Lilly lay in bed with a thermometer in her mouth with bad sunburn. When it beeped she groaned seeing that she did in fact have a high grade fever "Crap" muttering out that word softly.

Yup Lilly had the flu, plus a bad cough to boot. She silently cursed herself for no using any sunscreen but also getting sick right as their squad was opening up a very dangerous cold job.


	10. Case Number Two: Love and Flu

When John returned to the usual drama of work, he didn't quite notice the stares of the squad eying his nicely tanned skin. Going on vacation had relaxed him, but knew that Lilly wasn't fairing too well with having both bad sunburn and the flu. Even this morning; she had thrown up while in severe pain. Not even Aloe Vera was putting out the blaze that had seemed to be spreading all over her body.

After making Lilly a cup of weak tea, he tried to be a comfort but found that she simply wanted to be alone. Nevertheless, John now began to work on this case; with his worries still on her. Just then Jefferies then came in before closing the door behind.

"Took a vacation I see", promoting John to take off his glass.

"Just out fishing, getting away from the city life" avoiding any speculation about where he really went. However Lilly had very well indeed was teaching him how to love again; but to have a life away from work.

Jefferies then took a seat" Since when do you take a vacation, seeing someone John"?

"No" came his response" Haven't really been out on the dating scene for a long time"; a lie but didn't want to reveal the woman whom he was now in love with.

Upon getting up, Jefferies looked back" Should try it, good to have you back".

Just moments after he had exited, John sat there alone in his office with Lilly on his mind. Right now he wanted to go over to her place and take care of her. It wasn't fair to leave her all alone and sick, after spending a week's vacation together. However with his case, John saw now way possible to just get up and leave.

As he came out, Scotty then looked up" Anyone seen Lil"?

"Call out sick, sounds pretty bad" chimed in Kat" She just called five minutes ago".

The rest of the squad looked very intrigued to know that Lilly Rush was in fact very sick; but wondered where she had went last week. However with this case, nobody had a time to do their own little investigation into Lilly's personal life.

Around lunchtime, John came over to her place to find her lying in bed looking even worse. Upon feeling her forehead, he knew that Lilly still had a fever" You drink anything"?

"No, my skin's on fire" she moaned.

Upon putting a straw into her mouth, Lilly then took a sip before lying back" My heart's pounding" feeling each hardened beat, before getting up the strength to take some Tylenol. As her body lay back once again, John could hear just how heavy her breathing had become.

While blotting both her forehead and the back of Lilly's neck; she moaned from the sunburn "It hurts".

" I know Lil, got too much of it", wiping a tendril of hair away from her face" Just need to rest, let us solve this one"; his lips now briefly touching her cheek.

Drawing in a breath, Lilly's eyes then closed while John gently cracked open a window for some fresh air. As he then turned to see his sleeping beauty lying there, he knew in his heart that he couldn't just leave her here all alone; and sick.

While she had slept, John cleaned up a little before noticing Olivia; the cat whom he had once made a pun about her having one eye. The cat seemed very harmless as she then scattered across the room, before galloping upstairs; probably into Lilly's bedroom.

He knew now not to make fun of them, knowing how much the cats had meant to her. Perhaps in a way they were her own source of comfort; moving onward John then heated up some more hot soup while on the phone with Jefferies.

"Had to take care of something important", still not stating why but from upstairs Lilly had missed the bathroom as she threw up miserably all over her newly bought comforter. As another round hit her once again, John came into the room before holding her hair while more sickness struck Lilly.

After the last round she lay back, immersed in dizziness as he then cleaned up; before handing her a garbage bag as the last remaining ruminants in her stomach were soon in there. Sure being sick was no picnic, especially since they had just spent a week's vacation in Miami Beach.

"Try to get some rest Lil, that's an order"

With a sly smile, she managed to say" Right Boss", which then prompted him to smile. As John then gave her a small kiss; her eyes then closed while she continued to let her body fight off the flu. As the days slowly progressed she began feeling better; especially since her fever had dropped.

However Lilly still wasn't feeling up to part about heading into work, especially since she still was hurting from being sunburned. One particular day, she had awaked with a single red rose resting beside her. Inside was a small note.

_Just thought this might help, Love John- _

A tiny smile now played on her lips, while her eyes only caught the love part. In fact the rose did help quite a lot, as more romance poured into the depths of her own heart.

Back in headquarters; even Jefferies was trying to figure out why John was acting so differently. He even became a lot lighter and even started joking around with everyone; a change from his own personality.

"Who's the girl John" he now asked" C'mon I've never seen you act this way before".

Letting out a smile, the other man didn't answer knowing that this wasn't the proper time to let the cat out the bag; so to speak. Besides he also was respectful to Lilly's wishes; about keeping this hushed from everyone in their lives.

Since John had to watch his grandson tonight, he couldn't even stop over briefly just to kiss her. However when his daughter had come to drop off Sean; she too automatically noticed something different about him.

"Dating anyone Dad", Janie asked seeing how much lighter and happier her father had become.

John shook his head" No, why"?

She then took a glance once again, inspecting his newly changed personality and apartment" Got a woman's touch, last time I was here there were papers scattered every which way".

He laughed softly, before kissing her" Go on, we'll be fine" eying Sean whom had just turned on a game.

After she had left; the two sat there watching the game but however the next afternoon John had met Lilly down by a nearby park.

As he took her hand, her eyes turned" What no kiss, I'm fine" reassuring him before letting out a cough. Being so caring and loving; John then placed his hand onto her forehead" Still warm Lil, should be back in bed not out here".

Little did she know that John was a romantic at heart, and his love could in fact cure her sickness.


	11. I wouldn't change us for the world

Once back at her apartment, John drew Lilly a warm bath. He knew that it would be one of the keys in helping her feel better once she was sitting in there, she felt him gently rubbing the soles of her feet. She then lay back, taking in slowly; steady deep breaths while letting John work his magic in disappearing her sickness.

As he then proceeded to massage her back, Lilly moaned softly; signaling that the burn was still very much evident. While in the midst of doing this, his phone rang but this time John didn't answer it; knowing that Lilly was more important now.

"You going to answer it" she asked, still keeping her eyes shut.

John then proceeded to light another candle" No, just relax Lil I want you to get better", the first time he had actually didn't feel like dealing with work. As warm water ran down her back, she breathed out before letting out a small cough.

After the relaxation bath, he then pulled her up; before wrapping her up in a towel. Lilly shivered before redressing herself. When finally in bed, with two blankets covering her entire body, while a thermometer was inside of her mouth.

"103", John announced softly before handing her two caplets.

As the rush of cool liquid then pushed the pills down into the depths of her stomach, Lilly lay there feeling him blotting her forehead and neck. That and combined with his love, she then allowed her body to enter sleep mode.

While the cold air from the winds seeped into the room from the window; John made sure that his love wouldn't freeze. His worrying then increased when she had awoken due to several deep coughs; before hearing how hard Lilly was breathing.

"Need to see a doctor Lil" saying it quietly "You're not fine", reading right into her own thoughts. As another bought then struck her, before she then managed to speak" Already saw one, I just need to take it easy".

As John then helped her to sit up, Lilly found that it was much easier to breathe rather than lying flat. By the time she was officially able to return to work, with her skin now nicely tanned. Even Scotty had to do a double take; before hearing Lilly coughing abruptly.

"Have a cold there, Lil"?

Lilly cleared her throat before looking over the case, still obviously not saying a single word. However he wasn't about to give up, as he then noticed how much lighter she had become since her vacation. Still it puzzled him in regards to have secretive she was about her presumed new love.

This didn't end there; Scotty kept on pressing her for details" Lil what's going on, haven't been acting yourself lately"?

"Nothing, will you drop it", not wanting to confess that she had been seeing John. That itself was still a deep secret, but silently cursed herself for getting some paint in her hair; as the two were busying redoing her living room.

She had decided to paint it Cinnamon; making the appearance of her home a lot brighter. Gloomy wasn't doing it for her anymore, but John just happened to be good at these kinds of things. Of course it got a tad romantic between the two at times, however she never felt taken advantaged by him.

Just then the sound of Scotty's voice; once again brought her back to reality" Could at least told me where you were going" he said worriedly" Got concerned when your phone kept bumping me to voicemail".

At this time Lilly lost her cool" I was on Vacation; get it I wasn't thinking about work". His nose flared wanting to know who was making her change into an happier person, but before he could do that John came out with more news in regards to the case. However neither of them exchanges looks of romance, but more on the terms of being two professionals instead.

However he mentioned to her about working late, but Lilly didn't not after being shot. She couldn't bear to be alone in the bullpen after this; but more importantly had a yoga class to attend instead. Later that night John sat there finishing up some paperwork before leaving, he then surprised her by picking her up from her class.

"Was thinking I finish up on the living room", causing her to smile.

"Already finished it this morning" as he then noticed the red paint, still etching into her blonde hair. John was always amazed by Lilly, in so many ways as they both continued walking together underneath the stars.

"Was thinking about redoing your apartment, kind of needs some changing", seeing him shaking his head" You're afraid of change aren't you"?

It was in fact very noticeable that John clearly didn't really like changing things. He preferred things to be simple but knew love sometimes changed things. One thing they didn't do was change each other, for they accepted and loved each other equally.

Now turning to him, Lilly took hold of his hand" Don't have to be with me all the time, can go out and have drinks with Will down at Jones".

With each other's eyes searching one another, John realized he also had to have social life besides their relationship. He had trouble separating work from real life; something that Lilly once couldn't do. After being shot, she soon realized that sharing some laughs with friends wasn't going to kill her. Work could in fact wait until the next morning.

Lilly understood about him; even the part about his shyness in the bedroom. That it was improving, but he had later found out that the living room wasn't fully painted. His eyes shifted back into "Boss Mode" for a split second.

"You could do it tonight" leaning closer" Or tomorrow" now in a huskily voice.

As their lips collided, tongues dancing to a foreign secretive dance; John then broke away" Tomorrow", leading her upstairs. Not long after, their clothes were scattered on the floor like crumbs; while their bodies shifted back and forth; breaths growing heavier.

Her heart was nearly racing with desire, while he hit that spot. Noise came seeping out, causing John to pull her down for yet another kiss. Lilly pushed herself harder against him, as they both moaned in pleasure.

She could feel his hands, roaming down her back as sweat dripped downward from her forehead. While moving at a fast speed; he grunted loudly while his body began working up to a release.

"Lil" breathing out her name, while Lilly's hardened breaths mixed with his name as she grew louder.

Before he knew she flew as he too soon joined her, while passion spread throughout his entire body. That didn't end there, especially with John being able to push her one more time over the edge. He knew she probably had more of an interest in sex than he had; their age different was a factor.

Nevertheless, John was starting to enjoy having a sex life again. In fact he felt a hundred times better, than ever before. After the last round, Lilly rolled off still breathing heavily.

"You surprised me", leaning her head down on his chest" Didn't know you had talent".

He chuckled" Think it's the other way around" seeing Lilly looking up at him" Still got it in me" which automatically put a smile onto her face.

"You act like you're too old, for anything. Then there's that other side of you" her eyes now sparkling like the stars in the skies" People don't realize how different you are outside of work".

The two shared a series of laughs before Lilly then rested her head on her pillow; while facing him. John watching her fall asleep; knowing that he wasn't t really old; and was letting the rest of his life pass him by; until being with her. In retrospect, they were both learning how to love as the bed of roses added more love, he soon joined her.

AS the hours sped away, Lilly then shifted onto his chest not aware that his phone had been buzzing. John didn't want to rouse, especially waking up the woman he loved so much. This in a way could be important as he then hit the talk button.

Like clockwork it was, promoting him to head on over to a crime scene that both Jefferies and Vera were already at. Before leaving, John gently moved Lilly onto her side before giving her a kiss. After throwing on his clothes he made sure that he was neatly groomed before heading down there.

"What took you so long" Jefferies asked" That woman of yours keeping you up" grinning at him.

John shook his head before examining the crime scene, only to find that it was merely a setup. Now the squad was back to square one but neither Jefferies or Vera had wanted to come back to headquarters, since the setup was work of some homeless; not the killer.

After spending about two hours, John went back to his apartment; noticing that she had been right. His place also needed a bit touching up; which was only going to get a little heavy with the romance especially from Lilly.

However all this home decoration was just the start of many more things to come?


	12. John and Lilly, snowbound or hiding out?

The trip to the hardware store, proved not to be a good thing for the two of them together; since Lilly had virtually not a clue what the sales guy was talking about. As John and him got more technical, she wandered down the cold cemented aisles in search for something to make her apartment to appear more modern.

However, upon seeing a kitchen remodeling center she then started talking a look to see what could be done to make it seems a bit cozier. Given that Lilly practically constantly ate out takeout; due to her no existent cooking skills; she then saw how much it would cost. Expensive indeed so that became out of the question.

Then there was hardwood floor paneling that she could do herself, Lilly felt good about choosing out a much darker floor but now had to think about getting new furniture to match. Chance was good but was it a bit too much, for awhile she had pondered it before then deciding to not go for the furniture.

Being always smart with her money, Lilly then walked away without buying it. She knew that the paint job was enough on the current budget; but that it wasn't such a big deal anyways. Her home had always been beautiful to her, besides all this wasn't going to make anything better.

After luring John away from the tool section, the two then headed back to his place. Lilly soon had learned that he was a pack rate; literally keeping old stuff.

"Sports page from 1989" rising up her eyebrows" You really need this" before discovering two boxes worth of sports stuff.

Lilly sneezed several times; due to the dust that had been collecting for sometime" Place is worse than the warehouse" before seeing him lifting the boxes into the large trash bag. John had enough of keeping old useless things, realizing that it wasn't nearly as important anymore. Letting it go was hard enough but she was right.

Upon getting up he now wearing shorts, that exposing the allure of her legs. His eyes followed her movement as Lilly headed into the kitchen in search for a bottle of water, before wrapped his arms around her slender waist.

With a small laugh, before being lifted onto the kitchen counter, before her eyes the noticed more sports stuff.

"Since when are you into Boxing" as the words were now turned into kisses. At first it was slow until John pushed her down while still devouring her mouth. The harder it had gotten the more she moaned due to the pleasure.

He then stepped back, seeing how heavy that Lilly's breathing had gotten. In fact John seemed to turned on by this" You're beautiful" as her lips curled into a devilish smile.

Sliding off the counter, Lilly then covered both the furniture and floor with a white sheet. With that wicked smile still plastered onto her face, she felt even more daring" Remove the shirt"; her voice growing sexier.

"No, I'm not as young as you", seeing her tongue curling sexily.

However that still made no difference to Lilly" Fine" turning around still with that look on her face. He then removed the top but kept on a t-shirt instead, as she smiled looking at him" Much better", handing him a paintbrush.

When a bit got onto his face, John found it amusing to dab her with it also. As the two shared more laughs together; their bed of roses grew even more. From outside both Jefferies and Vera heard the music as the two then turned to each other.

"Think it's the girl that he's been seeing" asked Vera.

Jefferies grinned" Why else would John not be at work" before knocking at his front door.

As the two heard this, Lilly automatically hid inside of his bedroom; in an effort to dodge off her coworkers. She didn't want those looks especially from Vera, whom was known at times to be a practical joker.

Once John had opened the door, the two men paused to look at him" New look there John".

"Just painting my apartment" he answered in an effort to not let them dare find out about the two of them. Besides it still wasn't the time for them to know about their relationship.

"So where's the woman whose been driving you crazy", grinned Jefferies as he then peaked around in hopes to find out the identity. Even Vera had sensed it" Got a woman's touch", seeing that it didn't leak of any dust" Spotless".

John chuckled in amusement over the two trying to figure of his personal life" You two prying into my life, I haven't been with anyone for awhile. Not the dating type", knowing that that was complete lie.

"Be secretive, bet she's something" before leaving his apartment. After closing the door behind, John knew that Lilly was indeed something special not to mention beautiful. He knew he felt lucky to even be with her but knew that the two men were still outside.

When they finally did in fact leave, Lilly came out" You tell them anything"?

" No, I think they know that something is up", kissing her soft lips" Just that you are an amazing", stroking the side of her cheek" Beautiful and someone I love".

As a single tear trickled out of Lilly's blue eyes " Getting romantic on me , John" seeing how fast he was catching on" Didn't know you could be this romantic"?

"I got you", as the two shared another small laugh, before continuing to paint his apartment. Though they had to stop in between due to several moments of kissing" Think we can continue this later", alluring to the fact that things were getting a little bit too overheated.

With a whisper, John let her silently into the bedroom. While he continued his motions, Lilly gasped over and over as if she was in a trace being seduced by the man she loved. As a heavy think layer of fog covered their bodies, the two barely could see but knew they could feel each other's love throughout their entire bodies.

As with time, the fog then cleared away leaving their breaths heavy with their bodies rushing of warm afterglow. Lilly was had never once been this satisfied as she was now, how on earth he had managed to create this was beyond her.

Moments then blinked like an eye, which then surpassed them into work that following Monday. By now she had forgotten about the paint which was still stuck in her blonde hair, along with some embedded in her fingernails.

Somehow this didn't go unnoticed; not even when both she and Scotty were doing a stakeout later on that night.

"Take it, you had a pretty wild weekend" chuckled Scotty in amusement.

Lilly shot him a look; though feeling slightly disgusted by the fact the was picturing her inside of his dirty mind" No, just attended some yoga classes".

In fact he didn't buy that story" Yoga, what is it some kind of ritual"?

"Look it up" she snapped, wanting to get off the subject of her personal life. However Scotty found it amusing to tease her about the possibility of having a new love" Keeping us in the loops about this guy".

The blonde quickly shot him another of her famous Ice queen looks" I'm not dating" before realizing she was wearing a gemstone diamond bracelet, that John had recently given to her. However she dismissed it as something she had from an old relationship.

By the time the stakeout had been cancelled; Lilly returned back to headquarters only to find that there was a road trip up to Maine; where the suspect had lived. After everyone had opted out, both she and John found themselves traveling up north. However with the conditions worsening due to the snow, he continued driving until the car had broken down on the side of the road; not far from the Merritt Parkway in Connecticut.

That wasn't the only thing that were traveling up for, but a small cabin in the woods that John had rented for the weekend. For the time being he stepped out into the blustery weather as he tried to fix whatever was wrong.

In fact Lilly sat there shivering due to being so cold, until John was able to start the car with success. Their luck turned sour when he slammed into heavy traffic due to a series of bad accidents on roadways; along with the heat not working.

Once stranded, John then wrapped his scarf around her neck before taking Lilly's hand into his "This better"?

"Still cold", sighing softly" Crap, forgot to charge my phone".

He then realizing this as well, before noticing more cops driving up" Not going out there Lil, I know better this time"; knowing that work and romance were too separate things.

Her lips cured slightly" You want to go out there don't you" shaking her head, while slightly amused" Don't you ever not want to forget about work"?

John laughed" The vacation I did"?

"No, your body was but not your mind", letting out a breath" I can forget about work, and just relax like I am now"; before the two just sat there.

However by the time the car started to move, Lilly had figured out the real motive for them headed up to Maine.

"We're staying at a log cabin, what for" her eyebrows raising" Don't we have work to do " her eyes now sparkling like the ice on the branches when the sun had shined on it.


	13. Trouble in Maine

Just as they were walking towards the cabin, the two were having a mini argument over several things. This quickly made a turn for the worst as John practically yelled at Lilly, hating the fact that she was commanding their relationship.

"Enough Lil" he yelled loudly" I tried to make you happy" before Lilly had cut him off.

Her eyes widening in anger, as her face turned into that classic Ice Queen look" Happy, this has nothing to do with this and you know it. Haven't answered me about why all of a sudden you decided to ditch work and stay here"?

John wasn't in the best of moods anymore" Already had taken care of it, Nick and Will is already there. I just needed some more time to be alone with you".

" Why, cause I'm younger and it makes you feel good to be with someone that isn't your age" Lilly relied sarcastically" Probably because I'm the only woman you had ever been with since your divorce long ago".

His face grew angrier from her comments; infuriating him to no end. Upon grabbing the keys, Lilly turned back around; still silently cursing at herself for being so stupid to fall in love with him.

"Lil wait" pausing for a moment" I just thought I'd be different, but I guess I'm much better off being on my own. You can go find someone your own age".

This time she didn't turn back, but instead headed down towards the car. Her tears iced up against her face; forever leaving them in sadness. While driving away, Lilly sniffled back several times but made no turns back. For she knew that her own heart had been broken to no end, by a man she still loved so much.

Back in the cabin, John sighed as he watched the fire burn away; thinking about the heartache that had now been deeply imbedded into his chest. He missed Lilly being there with him, wanting to apologize for his own mistakes. The more he had thought about it, John realized that his actions were wrong; especially since he knew how to have fun but wouldn't let himself do exactly that.

Refusing to open his eyes and try out newer things probably was the icing on the cake. How much could Lilly take if he wasn't the one who pretended to not be open minded, as John let out another long sigh. For the first time, being along wasn't quite cutting it this time. Work didn't seem all that great, not after she had walked out on him.

Still he remained there, finishing off another glass of scotch before pouring himself another shot. Love wasn't all that simple; especially for him. John knew that he had very well indeed, broken Lilly's heart. To him it hurt knowing that she had gotten another chance at life; only to have heartbreak so quickly.

However, Lilly was taking this heartbreak lightly. In fact she tried to move herself past it, but clearly Scotty could very well tell; once he had arrived in Maine.

He was like the little brother that she had never had; Scotty was very protective over both her and her heart. In fact he despised any guys whom she was or had dated; knowing that they weren't good enough for her.

Now, Scotty was worried as they sat together in the car; staking out a presumed suspect.

"Something happen" he asked, worriedly

The blonde shook her head softly; not wanting to spill the juice about her former relationship with John. However the look in the younger man's face was once full of worry and concern for her. Instead Scotty just left it as that; knowing that Lilly was in fact taking this whole thing much more calmly then she usually had done.

On the inside, Lilly was in tears over walking out on John. She practically had given up on him, but probably for a good reason. Maybe he was indeed better off without her; some people did prefer the company of being along; not her. Though many had thought that for years, deep down Lilly hated that feeling with a passion.

However John remained locked in the cabin, trying to figure himself out. He felt miserable without her, wishing that he just could have not ruined their entire vacation. It didn't feel nice being alone; needing to even hear that laughter emerging from Lilly's mouth.

She had the sweetest laugh, but also had an aura around her that had brought some life into the darkness of his world. Now that was gone, but John clearly still loved her.

Just then she stood there, wearing that long black coat with the magenta lining" Just came back to get my stuff".

"Lil, wait" now standing up "I'm sorry, I need you".

Her heart wanted back in but Lilly was still skeptical over him" Why, so you can feel younger around me"?

John shook his head" No, I never had felt that way. I'm just not into the things you like to do; doesn't make me love you any less. I see how other men my age are; but I'm not them".

She knew he never tried to appear younger, but what he was saying was in fact true" I don't know if this can be fixed, I'm heading home the suspect was seen back in Philly".

Just then the lights went out in the cabin, as Lilly then went outside only to realize that the conditions weren't that safe to be driving in. Being stubborn of course, she knew that her life could in fact be in danger.

Staying with her ex wasn't an option any longer, especially given the weather circumstances. However Lilly automatically didn't speak to him nor did she give him that look. Things clearly weren't looking up for the two of them, especially when she locked herself in the bedroom and wouldn't come out. To John he knew he had to prove to her that he could in fact change.

After picking the lock, he stood there seeing Lilly curled up in bed watching the snow. Being concerned he then draped a blanket over her.

"Just wanted to make sure that you were warm, didn't want you to freeze", seeing how blue her eyes truly were.

He then put a warm mug of tea down on the nightstand" Still want to do things with you Lil" before closing the door behind him; leaving Lilly lying there undecided what her heart truly was wanting. As she then took a sip of some warm tea, she knew that if John really was like the other guys he would have wanted something more.

Clearly this wasn't a sexual purpose, considering that his shyness in the bedroom. Lilly wasn't exactly a woman in her twenties but a merely an age of thirty six; was it the fact that maybe she was embarrassed to be seen with a man in his late fifties?

Whatever the real reason behind all of this, she remained silent; even refusing to be around him. However by nightfall; Lilly finally came out with a blanket wrapped around her body. John was still sitting there drinking some scotch.

"That keeping you warm" she asked before sitting down; but not that close to him.

He put it down knowing that her own mother had been an alcoholic and the smell probably reminded her of her own past "I screwed up John" letting out a sigh.

This made him turn towards her" No you didn't Lil, it's me".

She then touched his hand, as his fingers softly stroked hers. Even without words; it was clearly indicated that they still in fact loved each other. Then their eyes met; taking the time to read into each other's thoughts. With one hand; John stroked her cheek feeling the softness that was of Lilly.

Her sparkling blue eyes were of like the ocean at night, as she then allowed herself to move closer to him. With her head now resting against his shoulder, her eyes began to feel somewhat sleepy but in a relaxed sort of way.

For awhile there was silence until, Lilly spoke softly" Still want that vacation", hearing him chuckling.

"Only with you", seeing that smile that instantly warmed his heart.

Reaching over her hand rested across his stomach, while John listened to the sound of Lilly breathing softly against him. Before he knew she was fast asleep; as he gently covered her up more. Perhaps this was a good sign of them getting back together.

By morning, the two had gone out to take a walk. Lilly as usual was shivering due to the extreme cold weather.

"Think this is at all wise to be doing this"?

Lilly shivered once again before losing her balance, somehow ended up falling deep into the snow. John landing on top of her as she then pulled him closer; while embracing the two found that they couldn't get enough of each other.

As he lifted his head seeing his snow angel, lying in the middle; her eyes as blue as the ocean; John then moved downward kissing Lilly once again. This time she moaned in delight while the snow kicked back and forth.

John then got up; as he then scooped up Lilly into his arms" What are you doing, put me down"?

"Not a chance" before carrying her up a hill, while snow continued falling on them. From up ahead there was a small place where people were ice skating. Now being put on the ground Lilly took his hand" Care to skate with me".

"You go Lil, I'll watch", seeing how joyful she had become. Once on the ice he hadn't had a clue that she could in fact skate pretty well. His eyes were watching her long legs as they turned several times, before heading on over to his direction.

Another man then noticed how John was looking at her" Daughter" he asked.

"Girlfriend", came John's response as the man looked at Lilly" You're a lucky stiff, couldn't catch someone like that".

"Wouldn't call it luck" before he walked away; but didn't think anything more of the guy's comments. Sure John felt happy that Lilly was his girlfriend; no matter what anyone had thought of regarding their big age difference.

Just then Lilly then slipped and fell, as John rushed onto the ice. Clearly she had been hurt, before he took her down to the local emergency center. As luck would have it, Lilly had in fact broken her arm while trying to break her fall.

After the cast had been set, John began taking care of her once again.

"Don't have to do this" she said" I'm fine really" not wanting to feel like an invalid. John understood as he stepped away allowing her some personal space. However she grew frustrated over the fact that it was her right hand that had been broken.

How the hell was she supposed to explain this one, but John had a way of explaining it since he was the boss.

"First the flu then this" she joked" Can't seem to hold it together".

As John then helped her to lie down, he knew that she wasn't very comfortable" Want to go home"?

"No, kind of like it here; being here with you"; before the phone had run alerting them of a case. As they then headed over to a hotel, John gave Lilly orders to stay there. He knew she wasn't in any condition to this; being that her arm was broken.

With cold snowy weather in Maine, the two still had some romantic time for each other; despite this.


	14. Winter in Romance

** Sorry about this being late, just got very busy with work. I will be continuing to update this story, haven't lost interest in this one. **

Though John was still working on the case, Lilly remained in her own hotel room; which she didn't share with him due to professional reasons. Aside from that she wasn't at all thrilled to be alone with a broken arm, feeling quite useless in the mix. It wasn't easy to do anything, but however Lilly didn't quite like reading through gossip magazines and tabloids while her squad was out there discovering newer clues.

By dusk, Lilly exhaled deeply as she lay back in bed watching some boring chick flick; while dining on room service. After shutting off the television, she threw the remote with the other hand. This wasn't at all like her to do that, but Lilly had quite enough of just sitting here completely bored out of her own mind.

Later on that night, as the steam was rising from the shower water fell upon the two. Keeping her eyes closed, Lilly felt his hands gently massaging her scalp mixed with a sweet smelling fragrance of shampoo. Though it wasn't good with a trash bag, wrapped tightly around her cast to prevent water from having any contract; she continued to relax and let John work his wonders on her.

Soon as his hands began running up and down on her chest, Lilly moaned softly enjoying the erotic sensation. Being here in the shower, brought forth a different experience; one that connected each and every bond.

Just moments after the soap had left her body; John continued to massage her back. He too felt the unbearably high of arousal; but wasn't quick in a rush to release it. Upon turning Lilly slightly, his lips then touched hers.

Without words, her eyes flickered open; displaying those blue eyes he loved so dearly. Now facing each other's nude bodies the two carefully studied one another; before Lilly then turned back around allowing his hands to wrap around her slender waist. His lips consumed every inch of her neck, while she continued moaning softly.

As the water turned off, John helped Lilly out before wrapping an extra large towel around her body. He then dried her hair to prevent any water from landing on the cast, before removing the garbage bag. Her eyes then alluding downward, as he soon caught on.

Soon the two were entwined underneath the sheets as breaths turned into pants, while they arms remained explorative. As another cloud burst, sprang out more snow outside; they bodies shook with pleasure mixing with love.

It wasn't until later that Lilly had looked over" What came over you" she asked romantically?

His smile was enough to tell her everything without words, as John leaned over kissing her lips a few times. As he got up, before they both redressed" Call you Tomorrow" he whispered before they stood in the doorway sharing a couple of goodnight kisses" Love you" came his final words for the night.

When the door shut, Lilly's heart did a triple beat as she soon had drifted off into a very deep sleep. As several days passed as the team proceeded to leave Maine, John had yet another idea. As he then pretended to get "lost", so that he could have more time with his love. There at a park the two walked through the snow before stopping.

Upon closing her eyes, Lilly sensed that either he was giving her something or that John was just simply going to kiss her. Upon opening them, her eyes widened in surprise seeing a multicolored gemstone bracelet around her left wrist; surely he was reading straight into her own thoughts.

"John" gazing at her bracelet, knowing that nobody had ever brought her anything quite like this. To her Lilly took the time to enjoy receiving this gift from someone she loved even more.

"I bought it for you, just after we had gotten together. This made me think of you" he said still trying not to be mushy about it.

Lilly smiled as she kissed his lips" Think we better head back, don't need rumors to swirl about us" before the two walked back to the car hand in hand.

For most of the trip, she had slept right through except to be greeted with Sports talk radio blaring from the speakers. Sure John was an avid sports fan but she couldn't complain; besides she too had a thing for sports as well. Her eyes then drifted shut, while Lilly then drifted back into a deep sleep not aware that John was still once again in heavy traffic.

As he then looked over at his sleeping angel, John couldn't help but to watch just how beautiful she looked while asleep. Her breathing was soft; as he gently moved away a tendril of hair from her face. Lilly did in fact have a beautiful one, but John didn't want to wake his beautiful girl up.

Though between gas stops, he took the liberty of getting her a hot cup of coffee; extra large. That automatically awoke Lilly as she gently sipped it.

"You sleep well" he asked.

"Not with this broken arm I'm not", but knew it wasn't forever. Besides at least John let her sleep without being interrupted. Her last boyfriend Joseph; would rouse her whenever a game was one. He too was another big sports fan, but louder and more annoying. Plus the fact he obsessed about her cats; unlike John whom steered clear of them.

Guess having one with one eye and the other with three legs, sort of kept him distant. Whatever it was Lilly wasn't one to complain, at least he didn't have this needy side to him. Her thoughts were soon interrupted by the sound of his phone ringing, as usual John acted like a boss while speaking to one of the members of their squad; Vera whom seemed at all stumped by this case.

"I made sure he listens to Jefferies, not need him mucking things up".

Lilly smiled" Like the Chimayo job, I think he's still made about getting his tie clipped", making John looked over at her" So that's why his tie was taped to the door, any thoughts as to why"?

"Nope" she replied" Vera had to sit through a musical, something I'd wouldn't do".

John chuckled as he veered over into the other lane" Either would I, not into that" as their eyes locked briefly. She was just as amazed that he also hated Musicals" Good thing, one thing you aren't taking me is to a musical or a ballet; but I would love to go to another sports game".

"Just don't let Scotty hear you saying that".

She knew how her partner loved to brag and make fun" He's not going to let me down about this" motioning to her bracelet. Taking her hand, John continued holding it as he continued to drive them both back to Philly.

Upon arriving, he made sure that Lilly had gotten into her apartment safely before driving away. However John went back to his place to shower and change before heading down to headquarters, from there he had to put with interrogating several suspect and dealing with Vera once again mucking up the case.

In the midst, Scotty also had to be restrained after attempting to punch out a suspect. With all this one his plate; John was literally immersed in work. He barely had time to call Lilly and make sure that she was alright.

However she had returned home from getting another x-ray; her arm was in fact healing well but the cast had to remain on. This didn't brighten Lilly's day; but after not hearing from John all day she knew that he probably was too involved in the case. By nightfall, she sat there watching a random game on TV while eating out of an ice cream carton.

However she wasn't going to bug her love, understanding that they both have a commitment to their job. Lilly completely understood especially with this kind of case; either way she knew that the trip to Maine was well worth it.

A few days later; she snuck into headquarters after hours to find John still sitting in his office. He looked overly tired "Need some sleep".

"I'm fine".

A wryly smile came over her face" You sound like more like me, I'm serious John I'm worried about you".

Taking off his glasses he felt the need of sleep, going without it surely was wearing him down "Got my cup of coffee" as she then took it away" Come work can wait until tomorrow".

When John didn't budge she threw him his coat" Let's go, everyone else is probably sleeping. I'm not about to let you pull another all nighter".

"I let you do that all the time"?

She turned giving him that smile he adored" Don't do that anymore, got a life" before John followed her into the elevator" You saying I don't" before the two shared a small laugh.

"Your delirious" as they left headquarters. Surely Lilly had been right; as soon as John had come home he immediately hit the bed. By the time her arm was fully healed, their relationship grew even stronger and happier; except for a certain conversation regarding the shooting; which had proved that John's love for her was incredibly strong even back then.


	15. Tupperware, Pillow talk and Chinese food

** Sorry this chapter is too short, this chapter is setting the stage for both John and Lilly moving onto the next level. But will the squad discover their relationship?**

* * *

One night Lilly lured John into a roller-skating rink, as he quickly made up his mind that he wasn't about to put on a pair of skates.

"I'm too old", protesting as Lilly then handed him a pair.

As soon as she looked up, Vera was skating around wearing a pink helmet while in a leisure suit that was a little too small for him. Her eyes rolled in disgust; but then saw that John was trying to ensure about their relationship not being found out. However as Lilly started to skate, she then saw Scotty and his tramp like girl friend playing around until he fell down.

Without a word the two left, saving themselves a big explanation about their relationship. However Lilly stopped into a store to buy some wine; before heading back to her place. Sometime later, while her head was leaning up against his shoulder, John began to speak about the shooting.

"I wanted to tell you to go home that night" he said" Just wish that I had done just that".

Lilly let out a breath" Never mind John, it's over I'm here with you" squeezing his hand" I don't think about it anymore".

He nodded softly before looking on over into the depths of her eyes, seeing just how pristine they were. Reaching over as John then grabbed a carton of take out Chinese before; feeding Lilly some Kung Pao Chicken.

Suddenly she then coughed, due to the spicy mustard; something she hated. As he then handed her a glass of water, Lilly still couldn't put out the fire that was burning the insides of her mouth.

"Didn't know that you liked it spicy, John" seeing him chuckling" What"?  
He then used a napkin; while gently wiping her face before kissing her lips, before moving upstairs. By the next morning, the two found themselves along in the elevator.

Upon putting on his glasses, John noticed that Lilly had been missing an earring; before producing one" Missing this"?  
Looking very embarrassed she then put back on the other hoop" Must have lost it last night"?  
"Yeah with a handsome man".

John smiled softly" You seeing someone Lil"?

"Let's just say that he's amazing, and almost burnt my mouth out with spicy mustard".

As the two shared a small laugh; he then cupped her face before sealing his lips with hers. It started out slow and gentle before becoming demanding; almost forgetting that they were in fact inside of an elevator at work.

When the Elevator had chimed, both had already broken apart. John's hair was sticking up, in the back due to Lilly's hands running through it. Before he had ascended into the bullpen, she then pulled him aside.

"May want to fix that in the back, Tupperman might talk"

John rolled his eyes" Don't mention that, even he is trying to talk me into buying some of it". Sure enough when they walked into the bullpen; Vera was hard at work trying to increase sales for selling Tupperware. Even Scotty was growing repulsed by the might; not even at all wanting to buy a load of plastic crap.

As Vera made that popping sound of freshness in the middle, Lilly groaned" Don't even bother, got enough junk lying around my place; before biting into a cinnamon roll".

Sure enough his eyes darkened knowing that the blonde had very well had eaten the roll previously, but John also came in eating it "Relax Nick, not the end of the work".

"Fine for you boss, but Rush here has been eating it".

Both of them shot the other man a look before, Lilly accidently smiled sweetly at him. Unfortunately that look of love was caught very well by Scotty who was still sitting down after taking an accident on the skating rink last night.

"Will you hurry up with the coffee, I ain't waiting all day".

Lilly turned around before placing his plain cup on his desk" I'm not serving you all day Scotty, you're not disabled get it yourself".

"That any way to treat an injured partner"?

"You fell on your ass, that doesn't constitute as being hurt", as another argument between both Kat and Vera broke out in the kitchen. However it while the two were going at it, Lilly remembered her nightmare from last night; regarding the shooting. This time she kept on seeing John getting shot before seeing the doctors shocking her own heart in order to get it to beat again.

Suddenly her legs became shaky before rushing into the bathroom to throw up. Lilly let the tears stream downward but knew she had to let those memories go, but John wouldn't let it go. Somehow he still felt responsible for letting her go into the room with Ed, but was it really guilty that he had been feeling all this time?


	16. Surprises

Upon coming back into the bullpen, Jefferies marched out carrying a big trash bag full of Tupperware; as Vera trailed behind rambling on about the many uses of it. Still Lilly kept her feelings inward, while trying hard to refocus herself back on the case. As the hours soon passed by before Vera came back with more so called Tupperware, making Scotty roll his eyes.

"Buying more of that crap, Nick"?

Lilly smiled, before looking over at her partner who lacked for better emotion. Just then Jefferies had caught sight of the Tupperware "Did you listen it isn't Linen's and Things, it's a police department"

Vera groaned as he began rambling about wanting to spruce up the department a little, even adding a vase of flowers to the kitchen area. This only made Kat but in as both she and Jefferies let it rip on him; while that had been going on, Scotty glanced over at his blonde partner.

"Wanna grab some drinks down at Jones"?

The blonde smiled slightly, knowing it had been awhile since the two had just hung out. However she knew all too well that John had wanted to get the shooting off of his chest; for good. Tonight probably wasn't the best night to be hanging out with Scotty. Just as she was about to speak, John came out calling her into his office; regarding the case.

However once inside, the conversation switched as John took off his glasses, placing them down on his desk" We need to talk Lil, I need to get this off of my chest for good".

She knew that she had to face talking about it sooner or later, but knew that John would never think any less or love her any differently. However a part of her wanted to move on and simply not discuss this, but the other half had wanted to.

In the middle of everything, Lilly smelled a different scent of cologne that she was accustomed to smell "You wearing something new on"?

"Just bought it downtown" he replied before seeing her sitting on his desk, batting her eyes flirting "Where Vera bought that tie that day"?

John chuckled while continuing to do more paperwork, as Lilly then got up before exiting his office. Though she didn't specify when they both would be speaking about it; he glanced upward knowing that his guilt was still very much evident. As flashes from that night appeared slowly from the depths of his inner mind, John remembered feeling the impact of the bullet in his chest.

Though he could see how horrified and scared in both of Lilly's eyes, he remained strong knowing that he couldn't bear to let Ed inflict harm on her. Upon seeing her being wheeled out on a stretcher, bleeding from her chest; John knew that he failed miserably.

However he was glad to have each day to spend with Lilly, as John stood up and went outside to take in a breather. As the stars shone brightly in the night sky, he knew that this relationship had indeed made him more mentally and physically healthier than ever before.

Later on that night, as the two lay in bed together as Lilly continued to listen to the sound of John's heart; feeling its sound comforting her. With an intake of breath, she knew that he also needed his own closure from this.

"Did you think you were going to die" her voice now sounding softer.

John drew in another breath" I just was in a lot of pain, didn't want him to kill you. It broke me seeing them wheeling you out like that".

As another round of silence came over the two, Lilly was still being soothed by the sound of his own heartbeat. It gave her the sense of both love and safety; something that many couldn't possibly give. The more she listened to it, the more Lilly felt at ease.

"Used to wake up, from having dream about me lying on the table; right before my heart had stopped; I looked scared not wanting to die".

When John heard this he continued to hold Lilly close to him, still fearing that he might in fact lose her again. Nonetheless she went on with the story" Could see those things on my chest, air tube in my nose. My face looked somewhat I like was waiting to die".

"You didn't Lil", hearing her exhale a single breath" When I was sitting by your side, watching your chest rising and falling; my hand was in yours the whole time" as it was exactly at this given moment.

John then felt her snuggling more into his chest" First time I had told you that I loved you". When she didn't answer he knew that she was finding comfort in him. Quite possibly their love for each was helping to ease away the painful memories left behind by the shooting.

Moments later Lilly was sound asleep on his chest, her breathing was soft but her dreams were now replaced with happier ones. For she knew that moving on was the better option; but knew that her present day life was much happier than her past.

However John wasn't having the best dreams, in his he had been dreaming about losing Lilly all over again; this time under different circumstances. It had gotten so bad, that he woke up out of breath; also awakening her.

"Hey" hearing his rapid heartbeat in her ear.

John sat up as Lilly followed" I'm alive" placing his hand on the middle of her chest "You feel my heart; I got another chance to start over, this time with you".

"That wasn't supposed to have happened, I tried to protect you".

Her hand gently caressed his cheek" Still can, can't save everyone John. I even told Scotty a similar thing that first day we had met. I'm glad he saved my life, though".

"He wasn't there for you afterwards, nobody was", as more guilt flowed through him" I treated you badly Lil, didn't know what to do".

Lilly understand completely before gently squeezing his hand" We're here now together, don't have to live with it anymore. Already spent that week in Miami Beach together, that trip to Maine" saying it with a smile as the same thoughts came out of John's mouth" I love you Lil, I'm not going to leave you like anyone else".

"I know, but you need to get some sleep" pushing him down before feeling him holding her close. By morning as John finishing dressing he noticed the beautiful blonde still asleep in his bed" Lil" kissing her" Have to get up".

"No" pulling the blankets over her head. He knew that when Lilly was asleep she liked to stay pretty much like that, upon pulling them downward John then sealed his lips onto hers before realizing that he had fell for one of her acts.

"I had you" Lilly said with a smile, before revealing that she was already dressed. Much to her own surprise John liked to go bowling but it wasn't at the same place that Saccardo had once taken her to. Once there she had also surprised him by bowling a few strikes.

However John was up for the challenge, as he too bowled only one strike. While immersed in one of their kisses, much to their horror Scotty had very well cleverly caught them. As much as he was immature at times; this wasn't the type of thing he wasn't going to brag about. The fact remained that Lilly was indeed with someone whom he knew and trusted that wasn't going to harm her.

Needless to say that also Vera and Jefferies had also been standing there. When their lips had broken away, John knew he wasn't going to break up simply because the rest of the squad now knew about their relationship.

"This needs to stay in the house, Lil and I am in one but the fact remains that I love her" he said later on privately in his office "It may seem weird but we keep the romance out of the office".

Vera grinned but then knew that the seriousness of other people finding out about their relationship. Keeping his mouth shut tightly, he resumed his attention back onto the case. While still inside Jefferies took a seat" Why didn't you tell me John, don't strike me as someone that Rush would consider".

"Lil's something isn't she" he said" Haven't been this happy in a long time"?

"Sure it isn't due to her being younger" grinned Jefferies.

John shook his head, but knew that he wasn't feeling any younger due to their big age difference. However Lilly knew that from this point on things were about to pick up, and become a lot stronger; though their coworkers kept it in secret their relationship was still going strong.


	17. Six month anniversary

By their sixth month anniversary, John had taken the liberty as to take Lilly out to a place that overlooked the water. This of course wasn't in Philadelphia but somewhere in the depths of New England, which he was growing to like more and more. Not that he loved the city of brotherly love, but the countryside made him feel much more relaxed and stable.

Though Lilly had her difference of opinion she didn't protest one bit, as she enjoyed celebrating their sixth month anniversary together. Not long after dinner, just as the two were walking along the docks hand in hand, underneath the stars; John turned before handing her a velvet box.

No it wasn't a ring, but as Lilly opened it her eyes sparkled with happiness. Inside was small diamond heart shaped necklace shimmering in gold, as John then clasped it around her neck.

"Happy Anniversary Lil" he said softly before leaning forward to capture her lips.

As the cool air settled into the night, they continued their journey hand in hand. With the wind at their backs, both knew at this very moment the two were very much indeed meant for each other. After leaving the docks, the two took a walk downtown taking in the scenery which was filled with small shops.

"Aren't you in the least surprise that not even Vera hasn't opened his mouth, about us"?  
John laughed" That I wouldn't call a surprise, Lil. Think his involvement as one of the Tupperware guys has really impacted his life".

"While annoying all of us about it" as the she then shivered slightly. One thing that Lilly hated was being cold even the slightest draft would make Goosebumps appear all over her skin.

When the two had gotten back to Philadelphia, Lilly decided to one night to just grab a couple of drinks with Scotty. Though the two spoke quietly, it was good to have their friendship back to normal.

"He give you that" noticing her necklace.

Lilly then pressed the necklace against her heart, for some reason feeling protective over this piece that John had just recently had given to her" Six months together, never thought I'd find someone".

"I just want you to be happy Lil, never like you and Saccardo together. He seemed like an overpowered mutt, not made for you".

Her eyes made a face" Overpowered Mutt" rolling her eyes at her Cuban partner" Could say that about yourself, Valens".

"Watch it Rush", with a smile joking like old times" Or I just might bring out the Tupperware".

Lilly groaned before sharing several more rounds of laughter, before Scotty had offered to take her home. Though he was still very much overprotective over her, he only wanted what was best. Perhaps nobody loved her the way he still did, but knew that both John and her were meant to be together.

"So how's boss like in the sack" seeing how his immature comment, didn't impress Lilly that much. Instead she let it slide, knowing that Scotty wasn't about to get anything out of her. Then her face dropped knowing that she needed to tell her partner something personal, which in fact Scotty could keep.

"It may look all happy to you, but I can't peel him away from the office".

Scotty's lips curled into a smile" You were like that once Lil, I like this new you. Seeing you this way is much better, but the boss seems to be there less often since he's been with you".

The two then smiled at one another" Night Lil".

"Night Scotty" before closing the door behind. Though she liked hanging out with him that night, her thoughts then subsided back to John. Perhaps Scotty was right; John wasn't spending that much time at the office. Though he was mainly in her bed at night, or vice versa; they both were clearly meant for each other.

Though sex wasn't every day, she still felt satisfied still ignoring Kat's stupid comment about older men and sex. Why did everyone have to analyze the fact that John was much older than she was; but failed to see that they loved each other for they were? What was worrying her was the fact of meeting his daughter, knowing that she was much closer to her age.

Although Lilly had met John's grandson; Sean, she had fun shooting some hoops with him at the park one afternoon. Even he was surprised that his grandpa even joined in on the game, but perhaps Lilly had gotten John to learn how to live a little.

When it finally came time to meet both John's daughter and brother, her heart was racing fast. Even at work she found that she couldn't even concentrate; for the fear that his family might not accept her. Though the two weren't engaged, there were signs that this would probably be heading one day down that path.

Besides this whole thing was John's idea, wanting her to see his family. Even he could sense that Lilly was incredibly nervous about tonight, as she accidently broke Scotty's coffee cup. As they continued to banter, John now felt that this was a bad idea. Maybe she wasn't ready for this, but knew better no to open his mouth.

Lilly's nervousness wasn't something he'd been going to drag himself in the middle, especially since it was regarding their relationship which was off limits at work. However was her meeting his family, setting the stage for an engagement yet to come?

Whatever it was she could feel her heart pounding even more, as Lilly ran into the bathroom to splash come cold water over her face. While holding onto the sink for support, she knew that things were getting very serious between the two; especially since now John had wanted her to meet his own family.

Was his family that she was scared of, since hers didn't exist anymore? With a father was presumed dead, and a sister that was running from the law; Lilly practically had no one except for the squad. After taking in a few cleansing breaths, silently telling herself that everything would be fine.


	18. Dinner with Nerves

** Sorry about this being awhile, been pretty busy with work**

* * *

Though dinner wasn't until three hours later, clothes were being scattered all over Lilly's bed as she frantically dug through the innards of her clothes in search for something nice. When her favorite jeans just happened to be sat on by Olivia, Lilly scowled trying to move the lazy cat.

After putting on the pair of jeans along with red striped shirt, she then caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She was nearly hyperventilating deep down inside so much so that she called John and told him, about feeling not up to it. Although he knew that Lilly was worried about his family rejecting her, he completely understood; but tonight gave him the chance to speak about the women he loved so much.

However when Scotty had arrived, he automatically had noticed how frazzled she was. This wasn't the Lilly Rush he had known but saw a much different side to her. Somehow he was quite surprised when she held onto him, while Scotty felt her heart racing against his chest. Clearly nervousness had gotten the best out of Lilly.

"It's alright, Lil", feeling her hands rubbing the back of his neck. Scotty remained a friend and didn't let his emotions get the best of him, but wanted to help Lilly in the best way possible.

"You can't be afraid, you know that Boss loves you", still finding it hard to realize that both her and John were actually dating. To him, he felt that Lilly deserved someone her own age, but however he could see that they only had eyes for each other.

When she pulled back and sat down on the couch, Scotty knew all too well that she was afraid of being rejected by his family.

"I heard Boss talking to Will, possible about marrying you" seeing hers, what the hell did you just say face on. More fear had rippled throughout Lilly's entire body, about becoming a wife. The thought of that appeased her but could she really see herself walking down to the aisle to John? Another question came to mind; would word of this separate them at work?

After a warm mug, filled with hot tea was placed into her hands; Lilly knew she had overreacted to this. "Crap" letting out breath" What am I going to do"?

"Gotta make it up to him, Lil" before throwing her a jacket" What are you doing".

"I'm taking you to the place, you can't dodge this one. I see the way that the boss has been looking at you; it's love Lil: for you".

Lilly shook her hand, not wanting to go for the fear that had been plaguing her. From the look in Scotty's eyes she knew she didn't have a choice, but during the carried her heart was doing a mile a minute. Keeping a hand there, Lilly breathed in and out feeling now nauseous due to being so nervous.

Finally when the car had rolled up in front of the diner, Scotty could sense that she was overflowing with nervousness.

"Hey", touching her shoulder" You'll be fine Lil, Ain't like this is a blind date".

Within a breath, Lilly then turned towards her friend and partner before getting out. As her footsteps were in synch with each quickening beat of her heart, she swallowed nervously before John came out to meet her.

"You okay" he asked, seeing the nervousness seething in through Lilly's blue eyes.

With a breath she nodded before John had taken her hand, much to her surprise the two had dinner together without his family. Somehow his brother was in the middle of handling something; along with his daughter. In retrospect; Lilly felt like a complete fool for acting the way that she did.

Afterwards the two strolled downtown, while holding hands. Even John had noticed just how usually quiet that she had become.

"I can understand if you're not ready", as Lilly didn't respond. Though the thought of him proposing to her was surely scaring her, she remained silent.

While sitting down together on a bench, John could sense that she was shutting herself up "Heard those rumors too Lil, but there not, wouldn't do it until the time was right for us".

This was a sign of relief but felt his hand rubbing her back, softly "That what you're afraid of Lil" seeing a pair of blue eyes looking over at him "I don't even know if I could do it again".

"I think you underestimate yourself John" speaking softly "Like pretending that you can't love, when I know that you can".

John turned now facing Lilly as his lips touched hers wanting access, when that was gained the two slowly sat there kissing each other softly. She needed to feel loved; knowing that what Scotty had said was in fact very true; that John only had eyes of love for her. Though rumors of him proposing were in fact just rumors; she knew all too well that he wasn't about to rush their relationship any further.

By the time the two had lay in bed together, a regular thing for them to sleep together. Although tonight didn't lead into sex, Lilly was glad to be with him. As the two spoke softly, she learned more things about him. About John's own fear about not being able to love someone, but knew he had met his match in more ways.

"I got to thinking about it, and called it off" he said admitting his own guilty" Should have told you ".

Lilly didn't let it get to her; but someone this was creating a small problem" Why didn't you tell me, got all nervous for no reason"?

"Didn't actually call it off, just told them to meet me at a different diner", seeing her eyes looking deeply into his" Liar, John I never pegged you for one. Don't tell me there wasn't actually going to be one"?

The look in his eyes was all that was needed before Lilly playfully swatted him with a pillow" You are evil, but" moving closure to him" Do like your thinking" before seeing a smile appearing on his lips.

John knew this little game was had gotten the best out of them, until he looked deeply into her eyes. He loved this woman so much, but wasn't hesitant to rush down the aisle. Though in his dream he could picture just how beautiful Lilly would look all decked out in a wedding gown; looking like the angel that she was; but perhaps this was vision of what might happen in their future together.

For right now, the two joined each other in dream land as night then once again turned into day. By morning; both Scotty and Jefferies had spotted both John and Lilly walking together. Both men each grinned at each other.

"Never seen John that happy before".

Scotty nodded" Or Lil" seeing that smile he loved so much on her face" Better go man, don't think we need to stick around and spy on them".

Jefferies looked at the handsome Cuban" Why, afraid that Lil might beat you up"?

"No, it's what I call ill advised", using the same words that Vera had used when trying to persuade him from dating Christina. Though he didn't listen, he knew this relationship between both John and Lilly wasn't a mixed up emotions one; it was one made up entirely over love and trust.

To him, Scotty wasn't about to spy and ruin probably this for Lilly. After all he was still her best friend, and friends didn't ruin relationships. Though he almost wreaked it with that thing with Christina, but Lilly was able to forgive and move on. As the detectives walked away leaving the two sharing a coffee together while enjoying the morning Philadelphian scenery before work.

Just two weeks later, Lilly had finally had dinner with his family. Surprisingly it turned out better than she had expected; but had to leave early due to something with the case. Not long after, Janie looked at her father" She doesn't seem so bad for you, but at least you aren't acting like one of those guys".

"Lil prefers me the way I am, I haven't felt this happy in a long time" he added.

Even his brother nodded in approval" How long before I'm announcing that you two are husband and wife"?

"A long time away, it's only been seven months".

Janie raised an eyebrow" So what are you going to do if she wants kids, Lil is thirty six probably wants to be a mother"?

This was question that John had never thought of, but knew that one of Lilly's dreams was to become a mom herself. He could sense that she was aching for a baby deep down inside" Don't know if I could give her one" indicating his age.

Inside John wasn't at the stage of his life for raising a baby, he was already a grandfather. However his daughter wasn't wrong about asking that question, especially since the two had been together for seven months now. They had a strong sex life, but John felt that he needed to discuss these things with Lilly. If in fact he still had it in him to get her pregnant.

For now, neither of them were speaking or even thinking about starting a family of their own. That desire may have been peeking up deep inside of Lilly's head at one point, but she surely wasn't ready for their relationship to take on that role yet or marriage so to speak.

However John knew that his daughter was just overly concerned with him, but what she didn't know was that neither one of them were even thinking about starting a family. Their relationship wasn't at that stage, plus the fact he was now starting to have problems sexually adding to the frustration in bed.


	19. Roses with dinner

That problem wasn't their biggest issue right now, but with this current case. Though this serial killer was a mix of both George and Ed; Lilly was much stronger now and wasn't about to let this guy get to her; at any cost.

However John became a bit more protective over her; not because of the fact that she was his girlfriend; but more among the lines of him not wanting to lose her for good. Between this and his lack of sexual performance in the bedroom, was causing a tremendous amount of tension between the two.

As the case heated up, he had given her strict orders to not go out there. This time he left her with Scotty alone in the bullpen while the rest of them went out there. Even he could sense a big change in their relationship, realizing quite possibly that quite possibly this wasn't the best relationship for Lilly to be in anymore.

"You're worn from it, Lil" he said, taking caution of how she might react.

Instead Lilly kept on looking through files, not wanting to admit the fact that her relationship was in fact turning very sour. Though the two no longer had a sex life, that wasn't the biggest issues; but John was becoming a big issue. His attitude turned cold, leaving her to weary away from him at times. She knew all too well that Scotty was trying to be there as a good friend, but maybe this was the time she needed him the most.

He then sat down" I know the boss ain't being so nice to you".

She nodded" It's been a little rough, John's got a lot on his mind, you know with the case", feeling the emptiness of roses now disappearing from the bed. Still she loved him; but knew that John probably made up the sexual frustration thing in order to push her away from him. As much as Lilly hated to think it was true; she was very well indeed starting to believe it.

"You gotta get out of it Lil, before something happens" he stated, seeing a pair of blue eyes looking right at him. By the time that John had returned, Lilly immediately closed the door to his office; preventing any unwanted eavesdropping.

Crossing her arms, Lilly stood there" What's going on John"?

Putting down his papers, as his tired eyes looked up at her" Guess what my daughter had said just got to me, about us having kids. My age difference, its okay if you want someone younger Lil".

Shaking her head, Lilly then touched his hand, gently" I'm not leaving John, haven't even crossed my mind about having a family. We're only dating seven months; we have plenty of time to discuss this".

He could sense that their hearts both still had wanted in, but knew that seeing a doctor about his condition was the first step. Though John knew that his age his sex drive had decreased from what it had been when younger, but weekly sex did in fact help him to relive stress. It wasn't just that but the love that the two still shared very deeply towards one another.

"We'll work it out Lil, not fair I had to put you through this", finally admitting his own faults. John felt a tremendous amount of guilt for causing a big rift in their relationship; but knew he still wanting to be with the women whom were still stealing his own heart.

Just a month after things had calmed down, the squad was still not close enough to find and capture their serial killer. Things between the two were getting better, as the two of them each were living with each on weekends only. One particular morning, Lilly came down to find John cooking her breakfast; as she then wrapped her arms around him.

"What made you do this", she asked.

He smiled while in the middle of cooking" No reason" before turning while they shared a kiss. Lilly still was pretty much tired, especially with her hair all messy. That and the fact she was wearing a pair of pink silk pajamas; complete with fuzzy white slippers was something that probably both Vera and Scotty would never let her down for.

For now, Lilly poured herself a cup of coffee before sitting on the countertop. The warmness combined with the caffeine awakened her senses; which were still pretty much fast asleep. However she liked these weekends together, especially in the morning hours

"Think you might need a haircut, if you're going to keep growing your hair out", noticing that during these past months, John had been growing out his hair instead of shaving it. As her hands ran down the back of his head; she liked when it wasn't like this. To her she didn't find this appealing but soon after breakfast, Lilly started in.

With him now seated in front of the bathroom sink, Lilly seductively moved closure before getting his hair back to the way it had been before, before stepping in front of him. As she then proceeded to lather up his face, John's hands made their way underneath her shirt. She moaned softly, feeling the magic of his hands arousing her.

Letting out a breath before starting to gently shave him, but then felt his fingers dipping into her pants. Her body shook with pleasure as fingers toyed at her center, causing Lilly to rock her hips.

"Let me finish" breathing out.

With his warm breath, hissing at her neck she knew that even though John was having sexual problems, he still knew how to turn her on. Though sex wasn't happening between the two, she tried any way possible that she could to get him aroused.

Still with a bit of shaving cream on his face, Lilly leaned down kissing him hard as her hips grinded against his body. John felt embarrassed by the fact that he couldn't perform at all, since his doctor had told him that it was psychological; not physical. Whatever it was, he tried to relax but instead started teasing Lilly at her peak.

As he drove her to her release, she cried out as her body shook with pleasure. When her breathing resumed normally, Lilly then peered up into his eyes before he pulled her closer for yet another long deep passionate kiss.

Later on the two took a walk by the harbor, just enjoying the change of scenery for awhile.

"Bet you could live out here, on your boat", teased Lilly seeing that John was probably dead serious about it. Sure he had dreams about living on it but knew for all the right reasons it was better to live in an apartment, for the time being.

When the two sat down on the dock, Lilly glanced over" I have a feeling that Janie doesn't want us together, considering our age differences".

"She's okay with us being together, she just is looking out for me".

While the two each drank from their beer bottle, Lilly looked out into the open water seeing it's true beauty up ahead" So why are you going through all this trouble to cook, when it's just your brother and daughter coming over"?

"I want them to see, who you really are Lil", rubbing the small of her back "Plus my grandson will be there", making a smile appear on her face. In fact Lilly liked that day that she played basketball with Sean at the park, so maybe she had nothing to be worried about if in fact she became John's wife.

One week later, as the two were preparing dinner together she felt him clasping something around her neck; in fact when Lilly peered down she saw a tiny blue gemstone; which was her birthstone as well. Before she could respond, John's lips had automatically sealed hers. During the middle of their kiss, the doorbell rang.


	20. To London and Ireland, we three go

For the most part dinner went smoothly as planned, but after they were down; Sean had wanted to show Lilly a video game. While she was in the next room; Janie looked over at her father seeing how content he had become.

"Sean seems to like Lilly a lot", seeing how the two were playing a certain video game. John smiled as he then proceeded to scrap off the food into the garbage can, glad that the dinner went along smoothly with the exception of his brother having to leave early.

Upon walking into the next room, Lilly was heavy engrossed into the game. Though she found playing this game exciting; John just happened to be much better than she was. By the end of it, the two found themselves alone after both his daughter and grandson had left for the night. While she was washing the dishes, she heard the sound of a sports game blaring from the TV.

It had seemed that John loved his sports with a passion, until she placed a glass of Irish whiskey down in front of him. His eyes now peered up, seeing Lilly looking extremely seductive. Taking a swig he then felt her lips on his, before pulling her on top of him. With a wave of tongues colliding, and arms moving; the two continued their motions of love.

Their bodies then left the warm couch, before Lilly found herself being pushed down on his bed minus now her shirt. John wasn't quick to rush into extreme pleasure, but rather take his time to kiss every part of her creamy skin.

By now Lilly's pants had grown much heavier as pleasure surrounded her, while feeling his tongue flickering all over her chest. Her hands ran across his back, urgently needing him inside her. As her pants then slid off, Lilly moaned impatiently.

However she then felt his lips back on hers; before he became shirtless. While their moans heated up, along with their bodies until his pants then fell to the floor. As Lilly felt each kiss, added to their bed of roses; as she felt him enter her, a sign that John had allowed himself to relax but hoped that he wouldn't lose it halfway through.

With their hips each grinding against each other, as heavy breaths filled the air, the two continued to make love. His body moved back and forth at a fast speed, while Lilly's moans only made them both more aroused.

"John", her voice sounding of pleasure before his lips kissing trails down her neck. Their hearts combined were each doing a series of rhythmic beating of their own, which now seemed to be pounding much harder now.

To him he was also enjoying this moment with her, forgetting about work and other things. As more moans came slipped out of her mouth, John bend down to kiss her once more" I love you", his words now breathless.

Now in another position, one that provided more pleasure to each individual, the two continued to meld their bodies together. Her hands now touching every part of his back, while his hot breath hissed at her neck; making Lilly shiver in desire.

Much to their own surprise the two ended up, climaxing together. By the next morning, just as Lilly was pouring herself a cup of coffee, John came in wearing his usual suit for work. Before getting himself a cup, the two then shared a couple of kisses.

"Must be that Irish whiskey" she joked, with her face displaying a proximate afterglow.

John smiled" Didn't have a chance to finish it, got distracted", seeing the devishlish look displayed on her face.

"Didn't know that you could lie well, seems like you had no problems _last_ _night"._

He then wrapped his arms around her waist" You going to remind me of that all day, Lil"?

Lilly turned before fixing his tie" Just don't lose this one, have a feeling Will and Scotty are up to no good, by the looks of things Vera's the type that pranks people", remembering the sign that had been post on the back of Scotty one particular morning. When he found out though, John had to stop Scotty from lashing out on Vera.

However when they did indeed get to work, an hour late due to him taking her out to breakfast; before they came in to find both Jefferies and Vera grinning at them.

"Another late night Lil" asked Scotty whom had just came out from getting another cup of coffee. As usual she didn't respond, but knew that everyone there knew about their relationship. Nevertheless John snapped into his boss mode, preventing any intimate details about what had happened last night.

During the course of the day, the squad was alerted from an anonymous tip, which the killer was hiding out in Ireland. However this trip had also included a brief visit to London; since their killer had also killed there.

To Lilly she immediately volunteered, wanting to travel to see countries that she had never been too. Though this was her first trip out of the United States, she felt the need to go. With her already going John looked around the bullpen.

"Anyone else, we need at least two more", seeing Jefferies looking away. Kat was out since she had Veronica to care for plus she also had a date with that same guy she once stood up. This now left both Scotty and Vera; whom both didn't want to go.

"A trip to both London and Ireland, c'mon it's not going to be so bad", chimed in Lilly whom couldn't wait to go there.

Scotty shook his head" Easy for you to say, from the looks of it you two would be probably smoothing every six seconds there".

"Do we look like were in high school" she retorted," You really don't know what love is".

He then moved closure, peering up into her eyes" I would", before being interrupted.

"If you didn't bang my sister", as Lilly walked over to the coffee maker.

The Cuban rolled his eyes, not knowing what this trip had in store for them. What both John and Lilly didn't know was how much this trip would in fact make their love stronger for each other. Now as Vera groaned after hearing the details, he wasn't thrilled about being on a plane for a long period of time. Neither was Lilly, after hearing the loud snoring coming out of John all last night.

Plus the fact he was also restless, though sex didn't help to calm his body afterwards like it did for hers. Being stuck on a plane with both him, Vera and Scotty was going to prove to be on hell of a headache. Just after a brief meeting, everyone went home. For Lilly she that thrown pretty much her work clothes in; along with a couple pairs of jeans, tops, and a lingerie piece that she knew that would turn John on. While uploading music to her I-pod; her computer just happened to crash.

"Crap", knowing that she had to be at the airport in five hours, leaving her with virtually no time to kid around. Somehow Lilly got her computer to run, before uploading the files. While that was being done, she then noticed that Olivia was sitting on two of her new dresses; which was something that she didn't wear too often.

Olivia then rolled over, before Lilly gently lifted her off of it" Sorry, can't sit there", before noticing that her cell's battery was just about dead. After rushing to connect her phone to the charger, while pulling out a beloved 33mm camera. Though nowadays this was old fashioned, Lilly preferred to take pictures this way, plus the fact she enjoyed taking photos; a secret that no one had known about her.

By the time that Lilly arrived at the airport, the wait wasn't that long. Unfortunaly she had to sit next to both Vera and John, while Scotty sat next to an old woman whom reeked of bad perfume. Clearly he would have preferred to sit next to Lilly.

While the plane was taking off, Lilly found herself to be breathing heavily. She hated that feeling of it ascending; John held her hand; until them both were up in the sky.

Soon after I-pods were allowed on, she sat back and listened to some of her music to calm her nerves.

"Could you lower that Lil" he asked hearing the loud rock music through her headphones.

Lilly knew she didn't have it on high, but figured out that John didn't really like the type of music she liked. AC/DC, and Nirvana were some of the band she enjoyed listening to; while it made him cringe from hearing it.

For Scotty, he was in total hell with this cranky old woman. Not only did she reek of that putrid perfume, she was also very nasty to him. Even while he was listening to music on his I-pod, she constantly was badgering him.

He groaned wishing that Lilly was sitting next to him instead, or Vera. This lady was now on his nerves and didn't seem to be stopping.

What Scotty didn't know was Lilly wasn't exactly comfortable either, especially with Vera sleeping with his mouth open and John now snoring away as usual. Plus the fact she was literally freezing, even that take on blanket she had brought on wasn't providing enough warmth.

However as Lilly was about to get up, she then noticed that Vera had just woken up.

"Sorry Lil, must have dosed off"; before Scotty moved closer" Could we switch, there's two seats there that are empty" which immediately made him sit down. Now taking his old seat, Scotty instantly was able to fall back asleep without that nasty old woman.

However Vera now found himself to be in hell with that woman all the way to London, while Lilly's head rested against John's shoulder, awaiting more romance in both London and Ireland.


	21. Lovely London

Though sitting on a plane for a long period of time was hard, Lilly had now discovered that Scotty was in fact a snorer as well; much worse than John was. However by the time, their plane had touched down in Heathrow Airport in London, all three of them went over to retrieve their luggage. On route to their hotel, Lilly's eyes were peeled outside the window seeing the different arrays of culture.

Once there, everyone had changed since it was nearing dinnertime. Almost immediately Vera and Scotty hit pubs while John and Lilly walked the streets of London together. The night was so crisp and clear that it made her feel even more romance just by being here, as they then stood over a bridge that overlooked a small lake.

"Never realized just how bright the stars really are", whispered Lilly as she leaned against John's shoulder. The night was indeed quiet, except for the beats of two hearts in love. As the cool air rippled throughout her long blonde hair, a short breath was exhaled. Moving forward their lips slowly collided sharing one of the many kisses here in London.

Shortly after that, the two then joined Vera and Scotty down at a pub. As usual the three of them had their shares of jokes and stories; especially ones that both Lilly and Scotty laughed at.

"So when's the wedding Boss" as Lilly kicked him from underneath the table. She hated his immaturity at times, especially now.

However John just chuckled, before putting his beer glass down" You and Nick will report to the station at 9am tomorrow, while Lil and I will be checking out the crime scenes".

"You mean doing her", added Vera, also seeing the ice queen look that was now being displayed on Lilly's face" I'm kidding Lil; don't know how to take a joke"?

The blonde's lips then curled into a smile" More than you could say, the way things are going between you and Toni".

Vera groaned, slightly knowing that his relationship wasn't that great. On the flipside of it, he found it amusing that Lilly was dating John. However after a man began chatting it up with the men; leaving her all by herself; not that she really was interested in their conversation. Upon putting on her coat, Lilly left the pub as she walked the streets peering into different windows of shops.

Not that Lilly had any money to buy things at the moment, but she found it nice to take in the sights and sounds of London before returning back to her hotel. Just ten minutes later, wearing a long gown; Lilly then climbed into bed.

She was bone tired and in need have sleep, after being sandwiched between both Scotty and John throughout the whole flight. However by morning, Lilly was greeted with someone planting kisses on her neck.

Her heart beat softy inside, while the feelings of romance began to build up quickly "How did you sneak in here"?

"Why are you talking to me, as if I'm a suspect"?

Her smile warmed" Don't we have work to do", speaking now in British accent. John chuckled upon hearing her speaking that way" Better get dressed then, meet you in ten" kissing the top of her head.

However the crime scene didn't give any type of clues, which were consistent with their killers MO. John, was now starting to think that it was either a copycat or another murderer, but still they had to go to Ireland to check out the other clues left behind.

For now John took Lilly shopping, which had proved to be a big disaster. She practically drove him crazy with choosing out different clothes, leaving him standing with carrying several bags. He had never imagined that she was the type of girl whom loved to shop, but deep down inside Lilly had a taste for shopping.

Though she hated to spend money, she broke her own rule and began buying. While holding up a pair of jeans that were pretty expensive; John made a face" You really need that Lil"?

"No, but I have a top to go with this", before setting her sights on a beautiful dress. While Lilly was in the dressing room trying it on, Vera then spotted John carrying several bags.

"Lil got you on bag patrol boss", with a grin.

John the sighed" More like driving me crazy, Let Lil loose and she's about to buy up the whole store", wanting nothing more than to leave. Personally he wasn't the type of guy whom could do this sort of thing, shortly after Lilly had came out he put an end to her spree.

"You got enough here", as the blonde shot him a look" I need shoes, mine don't match with this", wanting to look nice for when they went out later that night.

He then gave her a look, prompting Lilly to buy only the dress before they left arguing back and forth. She knew that John hated shopping with a passion, even when it came to him.

" Never said that you had to come, could have just parked it at the pub sucking down another Irish whiskey" before throwing the bags down in her hotel room" I'm heading out, do me a favor don't come with me".

While out on a walk, Scotty then joined her being a good friend as always. As Lilly began to snap several pictures he glanced over at her" You a photographer Lil"?

"No, not at all. Just like to capture the moment".

His footsteps then stopped" You sort of sound like one, you ever hear of Digital"?

"Yeah what about"?

Putting his hands into his pocket, Scotty continued to walk "Just saying, might want to junk that film stuff, less expensive to see the pictures".

"Wanna buy me camera, I'm kind of broke here" making him laugh" What"?

Scotty then shook his head" You spending all that money shopping, think you might have to work harder" before walking into a parked car. He wasn't too bright about things, but Lilly didn't let that dampen her visit to London.

"Scotty"

"Yeah"

"Shut up", before her camera clicked, snapping a picture of two elderly locals kissing in a park. Aside from that Lilly was fitting in here in London quite well, which is until Scotty then decided to ruin the moment even more.

"What is with you all of sudden", giving him that ice queen stare of hers, hoping that she could enjoy her time with John in Ireland without the annoyance from Scotty.


	22. The rules of Engagment, Stillman style

However with a click of his cellphone, Scotty caught the image of Lilly. Though it was very like her old flame, Saccardo to do just that. His immature humor was enough for her to shoot him another one of her classic ice queen cold stares at him.

On the bus back, a man was constantly staring at Lilly not in a perverted way. She ignored him; not wanting this guy to stir up any trouble, before Scotty causally put his arm around her. It wasn't out of love but more of him being just plain protective over her.

Not long after getting off the bus, the two of them continued to walk together" You are beautiful Lil, people do look at you".

Her shoulders then bunched up, prompting Scotty to ask another question" What you don't think you are, one of the first things I've noticed about you".

"Yeah and the fact that you wanted to do me as well"

Scotty shook his head" We aren't meant to be together Lil, I'm not the type of guy you deserve".

"I just realized this is probably the first time we actually hung out together as friends".

"Did that in Tennessee remember"?

Lilly rolled her eyes" That was work, not to mention that tramp you screwed there", before he then peered up at her before following her into the hotel room. Soon after the two sat there on the couch laughing while sharing a beer together, which wasn't common for them to do so?

"How come we never get to do this back home, we been working together for six years now"?

Scotty shrugged" Just feels right, being here", eyeing her heart shaped necklace" The boss give that to you"?

Reaching over he proceeded to inspect it, before Lilly blocked it with her hand. She then pressed it against her chest; as a sign that she was only John's and no one else's. He understood just how much the two of them loved each other" Don't see him proposing to you", eying Lilly's empty ring finger" Just saying".

"Never actually thought of me getting married" sighed Lilly" I don't know if I could be anyone's wife".

Scotty took a swig of his beer, before putting it back down" C'mon Lil, you're afraid of marrying the boss when you almost married Ray".

"Don't remind me of him"; taking in another swig of her beer" I just don't want to ruin this you know".

He understood completely; but knew that he couldn't give too much advice on a subject he barely knew about. Though once engaged to Elisa; whom was now deceased, Scotty lacked knowledge on what it really felt like to love someone without screwing up.

Glancing over, he could see that Lilly was very much in love" I better get going, Nick wants to hit more of the pubs".

"Trolling for British women", speaking now in a British accent.

Scotty laughed softly, before leaving her all alone. Letting out a breath, Lilly relaxed as she then proceeded to take a long hot bath while John sat a pub downtown pondering his own relationship with her.

The more he had thought about it, the more that John was considering marrying her. However he was planning for their engagement to be long; since neither of them weren't ready to be living full time with each other as of yet.

There was just one tiny problem; he hadn't actually bought her a ring yet. John was still nervous about going through with this, but the truth was he couldn't take his eyes off of Lilly for even a second. For the rest of the trip, the two strolled around different parts of London. One particular day, she handed Scotty a camera that looked more relucent to photograph them.

"I ain't a photographer Lil".

"You going to take the picture or what", before Scotty looked through the hole seeing how both John and Lilly were looking in each other's eyes. His hand then gently stroked the side of her cheek, while soft breaths breathed out of their mouths.

Her blue eyes were like a magnet; drawing him closer as John's hand traveled down to her heart. Without breaking any contract, Lilly held it close letting him feel each beat. From underneath his hand he could feel the soft beatings; combined with the softness of her skin.

_Click, Click, Click_

As Scotty snapped a few more from other angles, realizing that the two were so consumed in each other that they had forgotten about him. That didn't matter anyways, as long as he was capturing every moment of their love.

With the force of love still at work, John gently pulled a long red rose before stepping away. At that precise moment, it had been caught on film by Scotty.

To him Lilly was an angel, but she wasn't his neither to love nor to touch. Her heart already had been captured by John himself; before a dose of reality slipped back in.

"Enough Scotty, you're wasting my film", snatching the camera away from him. However was able to retrieve the camera back as he then snapped a photo of both Lilly and Scotty fighting. To him their fights were among the nature of two siblings.

Needless to say the two of them slept in separate rooms that night, following an argument over something. Unfortunaly John said something that completely ticked off Lilly to no end, promoting her to sleep alone that night; which would be their last night in London before traveling to Ireland.

By that time the two were fighting so much, which John broke off the relationship causing tears to well up in her eyes. Lilly never had once expected this "Can't we try", sounding like she had done with Joseph.

"I had enough of this, I'm flying back I expect to see you at the office Rush", giving her his classic angry face along with a stern voice.

"We can't do this Lil, go find someone younger ", before slamming the door shut behind. Now torn, sad and angry Lilly slid down the door crying hard, knowing that she had just lost a pretty good relationship. On the other side, John could hear the sound of her sadness; especially how she sounded like a little girl crying.

He had enough of both dating and love. During the next few days in Ireland, Lilly refused to come out of her hotel room; thus worrying Scotty to death.

"This ain't normal; I've seen Lil after breakups but never to this extreme. You gotta do something boss; she loves you. I hear her crying, this ain't right".

John remained in a foul mood" Give it a rest Scotty, she'll get over it".

"No she won't, you think Lil will look at you the same anymore. You can't do this to her, after all she's been through".

He didn't listen but instead shut his door, leaving Scotty in the mix. All he could do was listen to the sound of an angel crying in the middle of the bed of dying roses, whose heart was now broken.

As the days then slowly passed, the angel rose before going outside to take a walk before John stood there on the docks alone.

"I'm sorry Lil, for what I had said".

Lilly crossed her arms" Thought you were heading back to Philly".

John then turned" I can't leave you here alone, not when I still love you so much", knowing that her heart was still broken. Taking her hand he then pulled her into a very long embrace, as Lilly began to feel loved once again. However as their embrace broke away he got on down on one knee.

"Lilly Rush will you marry me", presenting her with an engagement ring.

Bittersweets tears streamed down her face, before John wrapped his arms around her waist. For a moment she cried out of happiness, as he then proceeded to slip the ring down her finger.

Together they shared a small kiss, but just two days later the two of them were involved in a car accident one that would change their lives forever.


	23. The manhunt in Ireland PT 1

As both John was driving the two back from a restaurant to celebrate their engagement, he kept on glancing on over at Lilly whom was very much fast asleep. The truth was he was ready to spend the rest of his life with her, but wasn't quite focusing on the road which was quite dark. Upon looking up he saw a car that was driving out of control.

Unsuccessfully, John tried to steer away but due to the rain, the car then skidded before the other car rammed into the passenger side. As the sound of footsteps ran off from that direction, Lilly's hand touched his.

Together they climbed out, as her eyes then spotted a set of very bright lights heading straight for their car. As the two took off together on foot, not knowing where to run since they were in a foreign country before several gunshots were heard.

"LIL", John yelled realizing that she wasn't at his side before noticing that his cell's battery was completely dead. Meanwhile, Lilly now wet and cold walked the roadway until collapsing on the ground. When she had come to; the first thing that she saw was Scotty.

His smile warmed" Hey".

At first Lilly was confused the she realized where she was" How did I get here"?

"Police found you on the side of a roadway", as a doctor came in to check her vital signs. After the cuff enlightened, she then felt the cold base of his stethoscope on her chest. As the sounds from her heart were transmitted into his ear, Lilly kept on looking at Scotty still wondering what really happened.

Lilly worried more about John. She hoped that he was alright. What had bothered her was the fact that she had lost her engagement ring, but for John he just happened to run into the police. It had turned out that the killer had tried to kill them both, but then fled on foot.

At the same time, John had found her ring before being escorted to the hospital nearby. Inside of the room, his hand gently moved a tendril of hair away from her face.

"How you feeling Lil", kissing her soft lips.

Lilly smiled" Just dizzy", but felt the pain radiating from her sprained left leg as John then slipped her ring back onto her finger" You found it"?

"I still want you to be my wife, I love you", kissing her lips again" I'm arraigning for both you and Scotty to fly back home in a few days; he tried to kill us", pausing to look into her blue eyes" I can't lose you".

She knew that this case still had warranted her attention" Let me stay", as a doctor came in to check her pressure. After that was completed, John continued to be at her side" Right now the authorities had spotted him back in London. Vera's on his way there right now, but Scotty's still here".

Taking in a deep breath, Lilly felt his hand on hers before she then proceeded to close her eyes once again. By the time that she had been released, the two spent a lot of their remaining time being together here in Ireland. However John had gone out one morning to retrace his family's footstep here, but found that there were no living decendents still left here.

When he returned, he found Lilly snapping photos in a park. Though her ankle hurt, it wasn't as if it was broken. She could still walk around, but put pressure on her other leg.

"My family came to Philly, during the twenties. No record of them after that time".

Lilly smiled" I don't know where mine came from, got no one left except my sister whose conveniently running from the law".

As he then sat down on a bench, John knew that she was missing her sister terribly" You want me to track Christina down".

"No it's okay".

"You need to make peace with her Lil, she's all you got left. Bad things can happen, but Christina's still your sister".

What he was saying did strike a bell within Lilly; knowing what if Christina had been found the chances was very slim of her ever sleeping with John. That wasn't really the point; Lilly had forgiven her sister about what had happened. She did in fact save her from marrying Patrick, whom probably wasn't the best thing for her.

After the shooting had occurred, Lilly had learned how to let things go and move on with her own life. Deep down her missed Christina a lot.

"Fine", after taking in a few cleansing breaths. John nodded before kissing her cheek" Got anything planned for today"?

"Was thinking of going swimming, later on", her voice becoming huskily.

John smiled" I don't swim Lil".

"C'mon" flashing that dazzling smile he loved so much" What else are you going to do besides playing poker with Scotty".

She anticipated his next response but John wasn't about to speak about work" Was thinking of going fishing, I hear the peers are great here. I kind of want to take my fiancé along this time".

Lilly smiled, before his phone had ringed, this time his face grew serious. Just moments after hanging up, John then took her hand" I want you to stay at the hotel, he's back".

Without a word he then assorted her back" Don't disobey orders, like you did with George. Stay here Lil" in his rough tone" I mean it".

She understood that between him being both her boss and fiancé; that John was just trying to shield her. Instead of just waiting by the phone, Lilly the decided to go swimming; despite her sprained ankle; though it hurt like hell she didn't care.

However upon arrival, her eyes caught the sight of Scotty swimming in a red Speedo; thus making her feel uncomfortable around him. He felt like a brother to her, but upon getting out a woman then followed him.

She had long red hair, nothing similar to ADA Thomas. Her lips then curled upon hearing John commanding that Scotty get changed and get ready for a manhunt.


	24. Magical surprises and sisterly love

While that was taking place, Lilly worried about her squad out hunting this serial killer down. However she ignored orders and went shopping; gazing into window shops of bridal stores. Since becoming engaged; her dreams of the big day were swirling around inside of her head.

In a store window, was a long white strapless dress that had tiny beads on the sides of it. Almost immediately Lilly wanted to try it on; but couldn't for two reasons. One being that the two hadn't even set a wedding date and the other was the fact that she had no money to buy it.

There was always hope, but until then she continued to stroll along; still gazing into other shops. Deep down she wanted to start to shop for her wedding but knew that this also needed John's input on this subject manner. Just as she was walking into a small courtyard, Lilly glanced around taking in the sights. It had a small bench, where she sat there drawing in the calm Irish air.

To her, this was much better than just sitting back at hotel and doing nothing. Besides she didn't feel immobile by having a sprained ankle, until that is her phone had ringed.

A cryptic voice then spoke, as Lilly then proceeded to head down there in caution. As soon as she entered this place she saw her whole squad standing there.

It had turned on that it was her surprise engagement party, that John had secretly had planned, using the manhunt as an excuse. He then proceeded to kiss her before slipping a rose corsage onto her wrist. Lilly was indeed surprised until she then saw Christina standing there looking quite differently.

For one thing she was now a brunette with medium hair, and didn't reek of cigarette smoke.

"Chris", walking up to her sister as the two sisters each looked at each other. Something the two embraced, as Christina felt happy about being reunited with her older sister. The charges against her had been dropped but she was no longer the same person previously.

Lilly happily smiled, but throughout the entire party; she could see love blossoming between both Scotty and Christina. Though she let whatever happened a few years back go, she knew that the two of them were meant for each other.

This time around, Scotty wasn't messed up but she then noticed how neither of them sat there drinking but were engaged in a normal conversation for once. Perhaps people could change, but just being here with the people she loved and cared about was more than she could ever want in her entire life.

John then handed her a martini, before the two stood outside to catch a breather.

"So are we going to actually set a date"?

He smiled softly" Was thinking of a winter wedding, right after your birthday", indicating that it would be sometime in January, but close to February.

She let out a breath, now leaning her head against his shoulder" Whatever happened to the killer"?

"He's dead; apparently he had taken his own life".

Lilly was glad about it, but then heard the sound of Christina laughing" I'm glad you found my sister, I did miss her a lot".

John's arm now was around her" Didn't take much to find her, she was living somewhere in New Jersey, had your old boyfriend; Eddie Saccardo track her down for me".

Upon giving her another kiss, he then proceeded to head back inside. A few minutes later, Christina came out sitting down next to Lilly.

"You got a good fiancé, Lil. Didn't expect you to be dating an older man".

A smile crept on Lilly's face" At least John is someone that I had been looking for", glancing over at her sister" Chris, I've let what happened between us go. You did save me from an abusive marriage to Patrick, but you are the only family I've got left".

Christina nodded" We're you really made that I was dating Scotty back then"?

"No, I guess I was still pining for Patrick but I didn't have any feelings for Scotty. I wanted him to have better but you did take advantage of him".

She shook her head" I was messed up Lil, took me awhile to get myself back on track. Got a good job and a nice apartment", sitting back" I always had wanted to be like you; strong you know"?

Lilly smiled" I do want you at my wedding Chris; this would mean something to me".

"Mom going to be there", causing a small wave of sadness pluming through Lilly's veins.

"She's dead Chris, died almost two years ago. Mom drank herself to death".

Upon hearing that made Christina realize that all she had was Lilly for family; in retrospect they always had each other never the one woman whom never really had made them ever feel really loved. She could remember hearing her mother reading the book: The Velveteen Rabbit; to Lilly seeing her older sister's head resting on her chest, being soothed by her heartbeat.

Christina never had been that close to her mother; but craved it. However as she came back to reality, she knew that Lilly had always been there for both the good and bad times in her life.

"So how did John arraign for you to come here"?

Her sister then turned, looking at how happy her older sister had become" Received a card, at first I thought you wouldn't' be so happy to see me here, but Scotty told me about your shooting".

Lilly's raised an eyebrow, knowing that Scotty had a big thing about family. Plus the fact he knew that he felt the need to be reuniting them.

" I got shot, the day after Mom had died", trying hard not to think about it" Almost died on the table" as Christina saw the look of fear that was still displayed in Lilly's eyes" Lil, I'm glad you're still alive" before the two shared a long hug.

As each other them cried, they knew as sisters; they needed each other more than ever. Though their relationship had been rocky, after their embrace the two noticed that Scotty had been standing there grinning.

"Awe the rush sisters", before seeing the same identical looks on each of their faces. Christina then groaned" You going to stare, or get us both something to drink"?

This automatically sent him back inside" So when are you going dress hunting, Lil"?

"You want to come with me"?

Christina smiled" That would be nice, Lil. Just to say I missed you a lot, I kind of think I was the bad sister".

"You weren't ever; we just grew up in the wrong family".

"We're still family, you and I", squeezing her hand before heading back inside.

Inside John and Lilly danced to some music, while their eyes locked together in synch with each beat of their hearts. It had seemed like the perfect ending for their trip to Ireland, but upon returning to the states her relationship with Christina was starting to strengthen.

Of course this time, Lilly didn't get made when both she and Scotty started to dating normally. This meant that he wasn't coming in unshaven or hung-over like before. Of course she had to tease him like olden times.

"You're just nervous Lil, explains why you've been putting on some weight".

Lilly shot him a look" And I'm not mad at you for dating her, again".

The Cuban glanced over, inspecting to insure that she wasn't "It's different this time; Chris has straightened herself out big time. She more into trying to teach both of us how to cook, then getting wasted at some bar", knowing that this relationship was indeed much better for him.

"If she has time, Chris is been putting more time in working at that daycare center", feeling the happiness that her baby sister was doing something good in her life "She wants to plan my wedding out".

Scotty sipped some of his coffee" You've changed also Lil, since the shooting. I like you this way, not full of sadness ".

"You coming onto me", jokingly. Lilly knew he was right, she did change but her life was much better than what it had been life. Letting that stuff going about Patrick, was a good thing. After all she was marrying a much better man, than he would ever be. Perhaps life wasn't so full of angst or sadness but something even better than that.

Just then Lilly caught Vera's eyes looking at her" Eating my tasty cakes I see", which made her more self conscious about herself.

She had been eating more, but it was due to all this talk of her future wedding. One night John literally had to take away the ice cream from her; knowing that this marriage would be her first. Though on the flipside it would be his second, John felt the jitters of trying to make his to be second marriage a success.

As another month went on by, Lilly grew even more nervous. Though the wedding wasn't set until next February of next year; her nerves were on hand until one night as John gave her a relaxing back massing. Lying down on her stomach, nude; she felt the warm lotion being caressed into her skin.

"You got to relax Lil", planting a trail of kisses down her spinal column.

Lilly breathed out, but continued to enjoy him massaging now her neck in combination with her back. She knew John was right, especially since nervousness always made her eat more. Turning over the two then proceeded to make love; which was already starting to heat up.

When the heat then died down, Lilly lay there in his sweaty arms feeling much more relaxed. By the next morning she joined Christina at her apartment, noticing that it was a pretty nice one; not to mention nicely decorated.

"Didn't know you could decorate".

Christina handed her a bottle of water" Always could, I like doing that type of thing. Your apartment could use a little touch up", keeping her mouth shut about her sister gaining weight. Though it wasn't much, she knew that her comments might make Lilly drift back away. However one morning, that all changed.


	25. Walk on the Ocean

Christina sat down on Lilly's bed, seeing what her sister was holding in her hands.

"Did you take the test", asking softly.

A breath was released as Lilly then nodded" Says that I'm pregnant", holding back her tears" I don't know if this test is really accurate", fearing that John might not want to go through with marrying her if he had found out about the baby. The truth was she knew that he didn't want any children, due to his age factor.

Then her sister's voice brought her back to reality" Have you gone to the doctor yet".

Shaking her head no, Lilly then released a breath. However she knew if in fact she was truly pregnant, she had to tell John. After all he was her finance; and a secret like this one shouldn't be kept from him. Calling out sick out of fear and resentment wasn't becoming of her, especially since Lilly was engaged to someone who loved her for who she was.

When John received word that Lilly wasn't coming into work, this morning; he immediately headed over to her apartment. There he found her wearing a pair of sweat pants and a top; looking quite casual.

"You alright", seeing how her hands were shaking while trying to guide the cup up to her mouth.

He then placed the glass back onto the counter, before she looked up" You know how I've been gaining weight recently", before handing him the test.

John raised an eyebrow" You sure, heard those type of things aren't that accurate".

His response didn't comfort her in the least" I need you there with me, if I am pregnant", knowing that she would need his support all the way.

However the thought of being a father in his late fifties, was scaring him. John wasn't nearly expecting to have another child, but was much more content with just having a grandson. One thing he wasn't going to do was leave the woman he loved so much, along to raise their baby; if she was in fact pregnant.

After making an appointment; which was set for three hours later; John had to return back to work. When he had gotten there, his nervous had clearly set in. By the time three hours had arrived, John was trying to act calm even though Lilly was quite nervous.

While chewing one of her fingers, as her name was being called out. Once inside of the room, her doctor went over a few things before performing a sonogram. As the wand moved against her pale skin; the two of them looked up to see something on the monitor; combined with the sound of their baby's heartbeat.

At first a million different thoughts rushed throughout John's mind, before he gave Lilly a smile. He couldn't believe that at his age; he could still be capable of having kids.

"You're almost three months along", her doctor spoke" the baby is completely healthy" before shutting off the screen. This then left the two of them along, as Lilly sat up" You alright with us having a baby thing"?

John was still in shock over it, but nodded. This made Lilly worry" Tell me, we don't hide secrets from each other".

"I don't know if I'm mentally or physically able to handle raising a baby", being honest.

Her eyes looked into his, before he touched her hand" One thing I'm not doing is leaving you", lifting up her chin" I love you"; eying her stomach.

As Lilly gently wiped off the gel, she then caressed her abdomen as a motherly smile came across her face" You already have experience; I'm a first time Mom".

John knew that she was right; he wasn't some nervous first time dad. He already was both a father and grandfather; which in a way did count. Sometime after leave the doctor's office, Lilly's hand remained on her stomach; protectively.

"So you heading back to the office", she asked.

He hesitated, pondering if he should leave his pregnant fiancé or head back" Have to, or Scotty might punch someone out again".

Moving closure their lips came together, before John's hand slid onto her stomach. A smile came across his face knowing that they had made this little life together. No sooner after he had returned, John felt a sense of normalcy in his life. He had an impending birth of his second child, and a wedding to look forward to.

To him life wasn't so bad, but clearly he now had other problems pertaining to his department. Like the fact that Scotty's anger was spiraling out of control; since Christina had dumped him just a few days ago. With now another case heating up, John was ready to tackle this next one.

The fact that Lilly wasn't in attendance, didn't sit well with Scotty either, as he was the next to arrive. What caught his eyes was baby book lying on the coffee table.

"You planning on having kids Lil"?

"Already have on in production", as she grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge. Scotty nearly was taken back, feeling slight uncomfortable with her carrying John's baby. Though he was fine with the fact the two were engaged; the baby thing took the cake.

Scotty let out a breath" Didn't think men at his age were capable doing that".

"Well, he did happy now".

He paused for a second, before glancing down at her stomach" How did the boss take it"?

"Better than I had imagined it", before Scotty sat down" I'm happy for you Lil, baby's going to be beautiful like you, or bald like him".

This made even Lilly chuckle a bit" just hopes it's a little girl", stroking her abdomen. Her voice grew softer when thinking about her unborn baby inside of her" I waited a long time, you know".

Scotty then squeezed her hand, before leaving. Even he was happy for his partner and best friend, but remained quiet about the pregnancy. Later that night, John arrived back at her place carrying a dozen roses.

After a light dinner, Lilly sat down as he was drinking some beer on the couch. He then noticed that her hands were caressing her stomach; before placing his hand there as well.

"We still getting married, or wait until this one is born".

John took a swig of his beer before setting it down, ignoring her rules about putting down some coasters.

"I imagine we won't have time, once this one arrives", leaning over to capture Lilly's lips "Got connections to a guy who works for a small place".

"Any chance we're heading back to Miami Beach", her eyes looking dreamily.

He chuckled a bit" Haven't thought about it, but you're bringing the sunscreen next time", making her laugh.

" No more pretending that you have work on your mind, from the guy who acted all shy about being in bed with me", touching her stomach to drive the point home.

John smiled once again" You taught me how to live again Lil, not many women had done that".

"What women would that be", looking at him, before the two continued to laugh together.

With now their wedding date being moved up, Lilly was already getting the jitters. The question was would everything be alright when she finally did walk down to him? Though it was nice to have Christina back in her life; and the fact that she was no longer dating Scotty was a major plus; Lilly had wondered if this was just a dream.

She knew that it was far from it; this was really happening but had no idea just how magical her wedding day would actually be.


	26. Countdown to John and Lilly's wedding

In between solving cases and preparing the nursery; Lilly became overly stressed about her upcoming wedding. Even while trying on several dresses; she couldn't find the one that was advertised in one of those magazines. Luckily, Christina was able to find it; but there was only one problem; it was a tad too tight around her stomach.

Lilly knew that she had been putting on some weight, even before knowing that she was pregnant. Now becoming frustrated with trying to find the perfect wedding gown, but grew Angier with the annoying saleslady. None of the dresses she insisted on were to her liking; Lilly wanted something beautiful and special for her big day; not something bland.

So that was one store that didn't captivate her eyes, but the next store had exactly what she had been looking for; except that her pregnancy would come into play. Though she had been reminded that she could have her dressed altered to accommodate that part; but as for Christina she was having fun on selection a crown that would go with her gown.

Lilly's face was priceless" A crown", rising up both of her eyebrows. She wasn't exactly a princess nor felt like one. She didn't like all that attention, but Christina did have a point that she was going to walk down the aisle to her future; both as a wife and a mother.

No sooner after they had left, Christina practically picked out the caterers since, she knew that they were the best in the city.

"Chris, why are you doing this", Lilly asked.

"I want to Lil", not quite telling her about the bridal party she had already set up. Though Christina was waiting until Lilly was about seven months along, before throwing a baby shower in her honor; she clearly was quite excited about her sister's wedding.

By the time the two of them returned to her apartment, Lilly sat down with her hand resting on her stomach. Being pregnant made her quite lethargic; but she was still glad that it happened. All this wedding and nursery planning wasn't clearly fun, all in all both she and John were just as equally nervous.

Just a month later, Lilly was led into a room as the lights came on she realized this was a surprise bridal shower. Though most people didn't know who her husband to be was; this made her feel much happier to receive some gifts. Both Kat and Christina exchanged looks in knowing that Lilly's surprise baby shower would be more explosive and lavish than of this.

For now, Lilly opened several gifts; one that contained a new coffee maker with some nice cups. She had been in need of it; ever since John had broken it accidently. What took the cake were several lingerie outfits that made her eyes roll. Though she knew that if Vera's eyes ever came into contract, he would be bragging about it for years to come.

"Figured that you could surprise him after a hard day", thus making Lilly feel a tad more uncomfortable. Besides she wasn't the type that could just prance around in something that made her look like a cheap stripper. Her other lingerie made her feel sexy, and had a pen cent of turning John on. This clearly wasn't something that she would be wearing any time soon.

Soon as the party had ended, Lilly immediately placed the bags into the trunk of her car; obscuring any raunchy comments from both Vera and Scotty.

"There's mother Rush", announced Scotty.

" Shut it", she replied, knowing that now things had gotten more interesting ever since news of her pregnancy had gotten out.

Vera grinned, seeing both Lilly and John heading back out again" Probably going to model some of that lingerie for him", angering Kat" The boss isn't Hugh Hefner, and Lil isn't twenty something or a porn star".

Scotty got a grip faster" That baby either will have her looks or his bald head".

"Enough", rising up a pair of scissors" Or maybe I'll do what you and Will did to Vera's tie"?

Vera looked over at Kat grinning, as she turned to him; shooting one of her ice queen looks. Meanwhile the two expectant parents were out eating at a diner; just after coming back from a sonogram. Though their baby was healthy, Lilly couldn't stop looking at the picture of it.

"Eat Lil, baby's hungry", pushing her plate forward.

Lilly smiled as she began to dig into her plate of foot" Hardly believe I'm actually having one, there's already rumors swirling around whom it may resemble".

"So what does Nick and Will having you doing on your last night being single"?

A chuckle came from his mouth" I don't think I will be doing anything".

"C'mon, you've been single for a long time. You sure you don't want to just enjoy your last night, before tying the night"?

John laughed softly" You really want me to, got a nursery to construct".

"Don't chance the subject on me".

"Why are you questioning me like a suspect"?

Upon getting up Lilly, flashed a smile at him before leaving. Upon returning she ignored Vera's comments about finding stripping clothes in her car. Somehow both Scotty and Jefferies didn't join in; they knew they didn't want a pregnant, nervous, bride to be detective chewing and clawing at him. Not to mention shooting them both her cold ice queen looks at any given second.

Later on that night, John spotted the tacky lingerie that was by the bedside. Almost immediately he looked startled by this; as Lilly then snatched it away" Don't worry, I'm not about to wear it".

Without a word he then lifted up her shirt, exposed her small baby bump. Lilly's lips formed a smile of: awe, love and wonder about their unborn baby. As their lips collided, bodies falling onto the bed as moans of pleasure began to entice each other.

Her hands ran back and forth, down his bare back while John deepened their kiss. Lilly breathed out harder" So am I going to experience this side of you, on our wedding night or are you going to play the "I'm too shy game"?

With a grin, John onto his back; knew that it would probably be a lot comfortable for Lilly since she was pregnant. Halfway through both of their phones rang.

"Leave it", saying it nearly breathless.

John pulled her down, closure to him "Wasn't even thinking of answer it", as the phone continued ringing" I think that's your phone".

"You still talking about it", pushing herself harder against him. Soon after having the more intense sex, Lilly lay there with her hand resting on her stomach, feeling his lips kissing her pale skin. As the two fell asleep she had no idea that both of his hands were around her; protectively.

One morning, as the two were out heading down to the jewelry store; to pick out each other's wedding rings; Lilly then stopped. Her hand went quickly to her stomach, as John then proceeded to do the same; feeling their baby's first movements together. To him he was overjoyed at the fact of having another child, but for Lilly having a baby meant the whole world to her.

"I think it will look like you; beautiful".

She smiled softly" Have a feeling that it would come out bald".

"I have hair Lil", feeling her hands running down the back of his head" Had Nick been spreading rumors again"?

"Don't be so insecure, I love you either way", taking his hand.

At some point, John had to stop and fix his hand in a store window; before the two walked down another street before entering the Jewelry store. There, Lilly tried on several different rings wanting one that would be perfect for her.

Her choices then narrowed down to three but had a hard time trying to decide. Going with her instincts, she chose out one that simple looking but acuminated to her tastes. However when trying to decide on John's ring; the two were up bantering creek.

"They all look the same", a typical male comment.

Lilly sighed, but seeing him pick his own out. She released another breath, while looking over at any piece of jewelry. At this point John, saw another ring that he felt would just take her breath away at the altar. Being creative and secretive he bought it; behind Lilly's back.

He couldn't resist, especially since now his pregnant fiancé was outside speaking on her cell, to her sister or Kat. Not that John had an interest in the latest gossip at hand, he then paid for their rings before setting a time and date so that Jefferies could pick them up.

While out shopping for their honeymoon, Lilly met up with both Kat and Christina while John joined Jefferies. Though the two knew that they couldn't shop together, but he had broken the rule about buying anything for their baby before their wedding. For starters; John had selected two baby blankets out; one in white the other in pink.

Of course, he handed over the bag to Jefferies to ensure that Lilly wouldn't be using her detective skills to snoop around. However getting back to the clothes, the two ended up with ton of bags but had no idea that there last hour being single would be spent together.

As far as their wedding day was concerned, it would be one for the records but would still be filled with love and happiness for the two of them.


	27. It's like Rain on your Wedding Day

As the days neared, closure to their wedding date, Lilly was constantly chewing on her fingernails out of nervousness. She was scared about actually going through with this; but between Christina driving her insane with questions regarding from the cake to the music was causing Lilly to almost want to throttle her.

Then it came down to their last night single, of course Lilly was being dragged across town by both her sister and Kat; while Vera and Jefferies celebrated with John at Jones Tavern. Of course, his was filled with men toasting him; but for Lilly she was sipping on some water; since she couldn't drink due to her pregnancy.

"Last night Lil", Christina said while holding a hypnotic martini in one hand.

Though that thought of tomorrow, she'd be walking down to John was scaring her. Taking in a deep breath, Lilly felt her baby stirring inside; as Christina then placed her hand there.

"Wow, think it's going to be that little girl you want"?

The blonde let out a breath" I don't think we'll be finding out, I kind of like to be surprised".

"Since when"?

A smile formed on Lilly's face" No reason, I just want to her the doctor announce it when it's born", knowing that moment would make that memory in both her and John's head forever. Though every morning, she felt his hand gently caressing her stomach; lovingly.

Upon feeling the need for some air, Lilly got up and went outside. The night was beautiful indeed; as her heart trembled with more nervousness about being married tomorrow. She was glad to have found someone, as her hand rested there.

Her eyes peered down at her growing abdomen" Hey you", speaking softly to her unborn child. Her lips now curled into a smile, while from inside; the little life lay there immersed in its dark watery environment. The soft beats and breaths from its mother were heard; as its own tiny heart continued to beat.

Outside the sound of John's voice, made Lilly snap her head up, "Catching a breather"?

"Yeah, um just got lost in my thoughts there for minute".

He smiled" Thinking about the baby"; reaching over to rest his hand there, before leaned over to kiss his soon to be wife" Just wanted to see you before tomorrow".

Lilly gave a small smile, before heading back inside. Somehow she ended up back home with Christina, as music from Nirvana blasted out from the speakers. It felt good to share her last evening being single with her sister, especially since the two hadn't really connected in a long time.

"You miss that Mom isn't going to be there", asked Christina.

The blonde nodded softly, while stroking her abdomen" Despite how she was, I knew that she loved me. Saw it in her eyes, right before she had died".

Christina felt bad that she wasn't around when their own mother took a turn for the worst" I never got to say goodbye, still don't think that she even loved me".

"She did Chris"; before Lilly peered down" I just hope that I can give this little one, everything that we lacked as kids".

"You will Lil", placing her hand there" You do look great being pregnant".

Lilly smiled softly; but couldn't stop her heart which was currently racing with nerves. That was normal, especially for someone who was getting married the next day. Though she barely slept, her mind was on both John and their unborn baby. Somehow the brief time that she did, it wasn't enough. By morning, Christina came into the bedroom.

"Wake up Lil", gently shaking her" Have to get up".

That only made Lilly opened up her eyes, realizing that today was the wedding back. With each frantic beat of her heart, she got up and showered before letting Christina style her hair. Between using a curling iron, hairspray and a blow dryer; she managed to establish a beautiful style without putting her hair up into its usual ponytail.

As the crown was placed on top of her head; Lilly's heart did a triple flutter; but also felt the baby fluttering also inside.

"Baby's getting a tad excited", she commented.

Christina smiled, while fixing her curls before applying some makeup, as Lilly remained seated still full of nerves. Meanwhile, John was also feeling the same way; as Jefferies fixed his tie.

"You ready to go through with this"?

John took in a breath" I never thought I'd be doing this again, finding someone like Lil".

"Who's currently pregnant with your child"?

The older man nodded" I'm glad that I could give her that, Lil's wanted to be a mother for so long".

As he now released a breath, he was being racked with more nerves about seeing his wife to be walking down the aisle to in; in a few hours. That also meant that he would no longer be a single middle aged bachelor; but that was a good thing.

Back at Lilly's apartment, she was in the bathroom putting on her wedding dress. Her heart was about to literally jump out of her chest. Though she had yearned for this day to come, it was the fact that everyone's eyes were going to be all on her; when she walked down that aisle. A hand went to her stomach, just as Lilly drew in a breath.

Upon coming out, Christina's face lit up" Lil", over how beautiful her sister had become. When Lilly had looked into the mirror, she saw herself in a different light. Combined with being pregnant, she felt beautiful while the little life continued to move.

Little did she knew, that Christina had captured this moment with a camera, "We have to go". Like the lyrics to the song" Ironic, "It's like Rain on your wedding day"; it was in fact raining out. Nonetheless the Rush sisters made it to the Church on time.

Once inside of a room, Scotty opened the door seeing his beautiful partner all decked out in a wedding dress. For a moment he couldn't speak, but then release a breath" Lil, you look beautiful", leaning over to kiss her on the cheek.

He too was looking pretty handsome in a tuxedo, " I never seen you all dressed up before", noticing how nervous Lilly already had become" Hey", saying their secret code" Your marrying someone good, got this one also to look forward to", eyeing her stomach.

Her eyes grew soft, as she placed his hand there. For a moment the two were each awed by that feeling, as Scotty smiled before pulling her into an embrace" I'll still be there for you, still can say Hey and I'll be there".

Lilly laughed softly" I will", touching his arm" Scotty thank you for doing this".

"At least I get to walk down with a beautiful girl".

He then slipped a corsage down her hand, and then proceeded to place the lavish bouquet of flowers into her hand" You ready to do this"?


	28. Mr and Mrs John Stillman

As the doors then proceeded to open, the two heard the music start to play. From down the altar, John gazed up seeing Lilly all decked out in a wedding gown. To him, she looked like an angel which made his heart beat faster which each glance. He had even seen such a beautiful bride that was carrying their unborn baby inside.

Getting back to Lilly, she could see everyone focusing on her. Scotty turned his head, knowing that he himself couldn't even take his eyes off of her. Within each step, towards the altar she took in several breaths all filled with nervousness. As both John and Lilly's eyes met up with each other, Scotty then placed her hand into his.

"Take care of her Boss", he whispered still feeling very protective over her.

As they said their vows; John gently slid the ring down her finger. Tears flowed down from Lilly's eyes, upon seeing the diamond ring that almost took her own breath away. With a shaky hand, she too slid his own down his finger.

Then they both heard the words" You may kiss the bride", as Lilly moved in closure tasting his lips on hers. Clearly it was probably one of the most romantic kisses, that any of the squad had ever had seen before. Though John took his time, kissing his new wife; he knew he loved her more than anything else in the entire world.

Just as bubbles began to fly up high into the air, John picked up Lilly into his arms; proceeding to carry her back up the aisle. Once outside he put her down; but the two posed for pictures, which were taken by Scotty since the photographer had bailed out on them this morning. Since it was a friend of John's brother, there wasn't another way that they could get another one so quick.

As Scotty snapped more of the newlywed couple, he noticed how they looked at each other; with such love and concern. Then a limo pulled up as the two got into, before being whisked away to a catering hall upstate.

Inside Lilly rested her head against his shoulder, before feeling something" The baby just kicked", prompting John to feel it. He too was amazed by this; especially since the two of them were now husband and wife.

Upon arrival, the two sat together at a table that was adored with multicolored roses. Though it was nice to have a small party, Lilly loved every moment of it. Especially when their wedding song began to play, as John let her out onto the dance floor; as all eyes began to shift back to the happy couple in love.

_Come to me now  
And lay your hands over me  
Even if it's a lie  
Say it will be alright  
And I shall believe_

I'm broken in two  
And I know you're on to me  
That I only come home  
When I'm so all alone  
But I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way  
You think it ought to be  
It seems like every time I try to make it right  
It all comes down on me  
Please say honestly you won't give up on me  
And I shall believe  
And I shall believe

Open the door  
And show me your face tonight  
I know it's true  
No one heals me like you  
And you hold the key

Never again  
would I turn away from you  
I'm so heavy tonight  
But your love is alright  
And I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way  
You think it ought to be  
It seems like every time I try to make it right  
It all comes down on me  
Please say honestly  
You won't give up on me  
And I shall believe  
I shall believe

As the music began to fade out, their eyes were still fixed on each other as their lips came together for a brief second. It was magical indeed; before Scotty came onto the dance floor" May I boss".

Putting his wife's hand into her partner's; John walked back to his seat; as the two began to dance.

_Oh, why do you look so sad?  
Tears are in your eyes  
Come on and come to me now  
Don't be ashamed to cry  
Let me see you through  
'Cause I've seen the dark side, too  
When the night falls on you  
You don't know what to do  
Nothing you confess  
Could make me love you less_

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

So if you're mad, get mad  
Don't hold it all inside  
Come on and talk to me now  
Hey, what you got to hide?  
I get angry too  
Well I'm a lot like you  
When you're standing at the crossroads  
And don't know which path to choose  
Let me come along  
'Cause even if you're wrong

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you  
Take me into your darkest hour  
And I'll never desert you  
I'll stand by you

And when  
When the night falls on you, baby  
You're feeling all alone  
You won't be on your own

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

This song fit perfectly, since Scotty had always stood by Lilly to ensure that nobody would ever harm her. Even as he danced with her, he couldn't take his eyes off of the blushing bride for a second. She was just too beautiful for his eyes to avoid.

"The boss is a lucky man", he whispered" To have you as his wife".

Lilly smiled softly, but didn't respond as she continued to dance with her best friend and partner. While resting her head on his shoulder; she closed her eyes, cherishing this moment with him. At the end of the song, Scotty then took her hand before placing it back into John's.

Though the food was good, their wedding cake came with jokes. On top of the cake was the bride holding a miniature case box in her hand, while the groom held a file.

Both John and Lilly turned to see; Vera grinning at him.

"Had to do it, didn't you", before picking up the cake cutter. As the two proceeded to cut the cake together, John then lovingly fed her.

As she did the same, before everyone else got their slice. However Lilly ended up eating about four big slices due to the hungry baby inside of her. When it got time to throw the bouquet, Christina lunged upward and grabbed it.

"Should we look forward to another Rush sister wedding", chuckled Jefferies?

Lilly released a breath" I wouldn't doubt it", but during her second dance with John, Sean came over wanting to dance with her. Dancing with him, was fun especially that hug had given her, just moments after they stopped dancing.

She knew that his family had accepted her, even Janie did as well. Though at first the news about the baby was odd, both she and Lilly got along pretty well. After a very long day, John carried her over the threshold of her apartment before closing the door.

"I'll go change", swaying her hips while walking up the stairs. After emerging from the bathroom, in a white lacy negligee, John felt himself being pushed down on the bed. He glanced up at her swelling abdomen" You're even beautiful like this".

This made Lilly's voice get a tiny bit sexual, before throwing off his shirt and pants. As their breaths ascended into bouts of heavier breaths; while kissing, he then slipped inside of her. While their bodies melted together, dancing to a foreign rhythm, as they collided together in bouts of pleasure.

Afterwards, the lay there underneath the covers; Lilly's head rested against John's chest.

"Can't believe we're actually married".

He smiled softly, "I'm glad we are Lil, got a second chance to be a better husband", his hand gently caressed her stomach" Baby's kicking up a storm", whispering softly.

Lilly knew that this baby meant the whole world to her, "Doesn't help since I'm hungry, again", sending him downstairs in search of something to eat. Upon coming back, he was carrying a cup of warm milk as she proceeded to drink all of it.

Somehow this helped her sleep; while being nestled in her husband's arms. By the next afternoon, the two were already in Miami Beach; starting their long romantic honeymoon together.


	29. Miami Beach Honeymoon Style

With the feel of the warm hot sun, combined with the sounds of gulls crying out, as the tide gently streamed inland; both Lilly and John both walked the shore together hand in hand. She then paused to feel the kicks of her unborn child, as he stood there seeing just how serene she had become.

He then captured several shots of her; with the ocean serving as a backdrop. John knew that Lilly was loving every single moment of her pregnancy; knowing how long she had waited to have a baby of her own.

Upon putting the camera away, the two resumed strolling together barefoot; on the warm hot sand. Though there weren't a lot of people there, they both were only immersed in each other. Not long after that, John sat there applying some suntan lotion onto her pale back. This served as a reminder, since last time she had came back severely sunburned.

Being gentle he rubbed some of it onto her stomach, "You look beautiful".

Her lips curled into a smile" You always tell me that", seeing that he meant it more due to her being pregnant, "Hoping for a son"?

"I'll be happy whatever you give me", prompting her to make a face, "Aren't you a little least curious", placing his hand there.

John did feel a big surge of love for their baby, "How about we be surprised", kissing her cheek. As the two lay back on their respectable beach chairs, Lilly enjoyed the warmth of the Miami sun. She didn't care that she was wearing a bikini while pregnant; nor did being marry to a man much old than she was.

The fact remained that it was love that had brought them together; but just ten minutes after that Lilly was playing some beach volleyball. Somehow when John had joined her, he ended up playing horribly but saw that his wife was much better at this than him.

Upon coming back to gather up their stuff, Lilly was playfully bantering him, "Need to work on your technique if you are going to play".

John gave her a look, before stopping her from bending downward, "Saying I can't play Volleyball Lil"?

"Just saying", as the two headed back to their room to shower. After that the two spent the afternoon, there; due to the bad storm that only had seemed to get worse. Using candles, they sat there together making light conversation; while listening to the sound of the rain beating down harder on the windows.

"Some Honeymoon, Huh", feeling his strong hands massaging her back.

In the darkness, he continued to rub her back knowing that he wouldn't have it any other way. Then Lilly released a breath, "You think ours will be different than your last one"?

John thought for a moment, " It's not the same, I am going to try and balance work and home life more"; knowing that him being such a workaholic cost him his last marriage and missing his daughter's birth as well. He wasn't about to screw up and make the same mistakes as before, especially knowing that his second marriage was deemed to be much stronger, than his previous one was.

The sound of Lilly breathing out deeply sent him back to reality. In her mind, she could hardly wait to start shopping for the baby. However as her body turned towards him, Lilly began to feel extremely sexy.

In fact he anticipated it, "Come here", pulling her closure, "How about we call some room service", and seeing that dazzling smile he loved so much.

"I want everything", making him laughs" I feel like Vera now".

John laughed softly, "Just don't make me run out for some tasty cakes in the middle of the night".

"I won't", before calling for some room service.

By the time it had arrived, the two sat together on the floor eating while candles continued to burn in the background. Lilly laughed softly while her husband lovingly fed her, " mom" , licking her lips, " Come here", teasing him.

Playfully wiping the sauce off of his lips, she tasted it before moving closure to deepen their kiss. As she made her way on top of him; the two continued to kiss each other. As a loud bolt of thunder was heard, the two broke apart.

" I think I'll head down to take a swim", whispering Lilly whom was glad that this hotel also had an indoor pool as well. Once there she felt a calming relief while swimming a few laps, knowing that the more exercise she did while pregnant; the healthier both her and the baby would be.

Just after finishing up another lap; Lilly took in a breather before noticing a man her age looking right at her. Though he resembled Scotty but wasn't nearly as handsome; she didn't speak to him. As the man tried to engage in conversation; Lilly got out of the pool and proceeded to walk back to her room.

At some point, he caught her. His eyes peered deeply into her blue ones.

" Get away from her", as John's stern voice was now being heard.

The man turned and looked at him, " What's your problem pops".

" He's my husband", Lilly replied, " Now get the hell off of me", before he noticed that she wasn't joking around.

Just moments after he had left, John looked at his wife, " He hurt you"?

" No", shaking her head as the two returned back to their rooms. After showering, they headed across town to a dance hall. While Salsa music played, Lilly kept up with each beat. Somehow the two ended up winning in a dance competition sometime later one.

What took the cake was, the band playing a song as everyone watched them dancing together. Lilly's eyes were dreamy; while gazing up into John's eyes. They knew that they had always loved each other, from day one.

Not to mention that he was also a good dancer, shortly after their dance together; both sat at their table listening to the music. It had turned out to be a perfect night; but as the days proceeded; the two were bantering early on that morning.

" I hate golf", Lilly replied, " Besides I kind of want to shop for the baby".

Coming out with a cap on his head, John took his hand, " You're coming with me", which practically left her without a choice. Arriving on the course, he put the golf club into her hands. While instructing her how to hit, Lilly ended up missing the balls; flinging the club across the field.

Of course it didn't hit any of the fellow players; but still John didn't lose his patience with his wife. Somehow as the lessons dawned on, Lilly was able to hit two holes in one. Clearly John was still beating her at it.

" Didn't know you were also good at this"?

Sipping a bottle of water, John the proceeded to hand it to her," We're not at work Lil", reminding her not to act like a detective.

A smile crept onto her face, " Why did I have my detective voice on"?

" Let's not think about it", taking her hand while they walked over before he set the ball down. Sometime later on the two returned to the shores, around nightfall to walk around.

" Ever thing of just leaving Philly" , she asked" and starting a new life"?

John sat down on one of the rocks, while continuing to hold her, " I thought about it, but Philly will always be my home", slipping her tickets to a cruise bound of the Bahamas. Now things were starting to get a little more romantic between them.


	30. Love in the Bahamas

However the two ended up flying, due to the fact that flying would be better for them. Once there, Lilly was taken aback by the choice of hotel that the two of them were staying in. It was quite beautiful; but nothing was compared to the oversized tub in their bathroom.

"No baths Lil, got things to do", which now caught Lilly totally off guard.

Slinking towards, him as she started to unpack, "Since when are you so eager to do things"?

He turned, but then Lilly noticed that her husband was just trying to peek her interests, "John you don't have to do everything I like, I prefer you the way you are".

This didn't help that much, "Not because of you, I've been feeling different since we've been together haven't even thought about work since we had gotten married".

Lilly was pretty surprised by all of this, "We'll your still bossing me around", saying it in a joking tone. John chuckled, "Why are we standing here, got things to do"; as the two went outside to explore the island.

Even they joined up with other couples, not once did Lilly regret about marrying him due to his age. In fact she was quite happy about her choice in a husband; and the fact that he still was fun to be around. What people didn't get was that he wasn't acting like another man his age; that was decked out in younger clothes.

Or the fact that John remained the man he always was; not even marriage could change that. Despite everything, the two of them remain distant from that couple; knowing that nothing could destroy their marriage.

Then that woman just happened to bump into Lilly, at a café, "That a result of invitro"?

"No", giving the woman one of her cold ice stares, "Just because I happen to be younger than my husband, doesn't mean I thing couldn't say the same for him" eyeing the other man singing badly off tune.

Even John raised his eyebrows, thinking that this guy was off his rocker. Not that he cared much about the other guy; whom probably just married his wife to feel younger. When Lilly arrived carrying their drinks, she sat down facing him.

Her eyes caught, another drink at another table, "Kind of wish I could have that, there's no way I would hurt this one".

As John drank some beer, he knew that his family had accepted her as is. Nobody had taken it that he was having a midlife crisis; which he wasn't. Even with an impending baby on the way; he just saw it as another positive chapter in his life.

Somehow the two had managed to escape the wrath of that woman, as the two held hands while walking around. Lilly was in a strapless summer maternity dress; that she had found for a good deal in the clearance section before she had gotten married.

However that woman's husband was now acting like a complete fool. It also made several people turn their heads; probably thinking that he was insane.

"He sort of looks like Vera", John pointed out.

Lilly shook her head, "I'm glad you're not the type to be doing that, but what's with the sunglasses"?

"You going to banger me now about it, just be lucky I'm not that guy having some midlife crisis".

She was thankful for that; since John was still dressed like someone his age; not like that other guy wearing a pair of tight teenage shorts. Plus the fact he was well toned; and just about to start a surfing contest.

When John saw the look on her face; he automatically knew that his wife was thinking, "No way Lil".

"C'mon", she teased, "I would but ", pointing to her stomach.

As the two watched the contest, Lilly laughed when the guy ended up falling into the water. When he yelled out losing his shorts; that's when the two decided to find something else to do. Besides the fact she felt lucky, that her husband wasn't out to embarrass her or himself.

"You sure this isn't Lunatic Island"?

John took her hand, but Lilly had stopped, "Hiccups" letting out a breath. He also felt it briefly, but was glad had been through the ropes before. However he was still nervous about raising a baby at his age; but knew it would be only five more months until their baby would be born.

For the time being, they went into several shops, before going dancing. Neither of them liked musicals; so that was out of the picture; but somehow the two won first place in the competition. Lilly had never actually won anything in her entire life, until now.

Just moments after, the two stood on the docks, breathing in some air.

"I could actually like out here, on the ocean".

Lilly nodded, while listening to him speaking, "When I almost retired, just sitting here on the docks relaxed me Lil. You were right, I can't just walk away".

"You thinking of retiring when the baby arrives"?

"No, I hate to think what Will or Vera might have to go through, besides I'm not ready to yet, not when we have a baby on the way"; putting his own life into perspective.

She understood completely, but was glad that he wasn't leaving the squad, "You going to turn into Crackpot Mack, John"?

He chuckled softly, "When I retire, work isn't going to follow me".

"How am I going to relay about my day", moving closure to him.

As the two laughed a bit; Lilly looked out to sea, seeing just how beautiful it was being here. Putting his hands around her waist; the two breathed took a long deep breath. Though they had stayed there until sunset, both knew that being married to one another was a good thing.

When both of their eyes caught the glimmering sunset over the horizon, their lips slowly came together. The last of love bloomed in their mouths, while the tiny life stirring softly inside of Lilly. However the two skipped dinner to continue to walk along the shore together instead.

With the cool tide running at their bare feet, John bent down to retrieve a small shell. He then placed it in his wife's hand. As she ran her fingers across the ridges, her blue eyes then caught sight of the moon that was the center of the stars.

"Never had noticed just how calm the ocean is", her voice barely in a whisper while leaning her head against John's shoulder. Being here made Lilly feel calmer and relaxed, just by listening to the sound of the ocean along with the gulls crying out at sea.

Once they came back to their rooms, their hot sweaty bodies moved around the bed; as they both panted harder. Lilly moaned while feeling him thrusting harder; prompting her to tilt her head back. She felt his hard, hot breath on her skin. Her heart was pounding faster, as his lips licked, sucked and kissed all over her neck.

As the tide crashed at the shore, the two climaxed hard together in a wonderful glory. While the gulls cried out their last cry of the night, the newlyweds lay in bed breathing hard.

"I think we woke this one up", managing to speak.

John caught his breath, as his hand slide onto her abdomen while looking into wife's eyes. By the next morning, while she lounged at the poolside; he was busy playing a round of golf. Until one of them got a call to return back to the states; since there was pretty violent case just warming right up?

Until that time, Lilly had to deal with that same nasty woman instead of enjoying a sunbathing session.


	31. Newlyweds back at home

However the two had to grab a connecting flight, back to Philadelphia. While waiting at an airport in Miami, John sat there listening to a ball game on his I-pod. For Lilly she hated waiting, especially since the flight had been delayed due to the weather.

"Flight to Philadelphia will be delayed for another hour", the announcer said over the loud speaker. Lilly immediately groaned, wanting to get home. Instead she picked up her cell; and dialed Scotty's number to inform him of the news.

When he answered, the two greeted each other with a simple, "Hey".

Giving a tight smile, Lilly stood up, "Flights going to be delayed for another hour". Back at home Scotty was standing in his apartment, wearing a grey hooded jacket and a pair of jeans. Although he wasn't on duty today; he had been lost at work without his partner being there.

Just moments after hanging up, John took off his headphone, "Scotty say how things were going"?

"Not really, I get the feeling that he wasn't at work. Didn't hear the constant ringing of phones in the background", was letting out a sigh.

Lilly then went over to purchase another drink; but ended up coming back with a drink and some extra large fries. She ended up shooting her husband a look for stealing one of her fries, " Hey", as he grinned at her, " I don't think I ever seen you eat so much".

She ignored his comment, while continuing to eat. However when they were finally allowed to board the plane, John let Lilly sit by the window. He knew that she barely had gotten any sleep last night; due them being out so late.

If their flight being delayed was worse; sitting onboard of an aircraft for twenty minutes was killer. By now Lilly was complaining about it, wanting nothing more than to be come home. When the plane did take off, she lay back and closed her eyes. As sleep soon caught up with her, John resumed reading the sports section of the paper. Though now their honeymoon was now officially over; his thoughts were now on creating a nursery for their baby.

If matters were worse, that very same woman was sitting just two rows back. The flight attendants were growing tired of both her and her husband; moaning loudly while they were kissing. This even awoke Lilly; whom didn't at all want to be disturbed.

"Did we really have to have her onboard"?  
John let out a breath, understanding both their frustrations, "I'm not letting her ruin this for us, besides I married the right woman".

This made her lips curl into a small smile, before falling back to sleep. During the rest of the flight, nothing happened by just after retrieving their luggage; John shook his head upon seeing that couple jetting off in a sports car. Although he had need to buy himself a new one, that wasn't what was on his mind.

Plus the fact John practically had no use for one, besides he usually walked to work. For the time being, they both went back to their apartments to take a load off. Though he was moving into hers pretty soon; John wasn't finished packing up his place.

When the two returned to work, Scotty glanced over at his pregnant partner, "Hey ", giving her a hug, "Honeymoon go alright"?

"Yeah, we ended up in the Bahamas".

Jefferies chuckled, "So where's your other half Lil, John's usually here before any of us".

Just then John walked in, carrying a tall cup of coffee. His skin was nicely tanned, before heading straight to his office. Though the newlyweds were in full work mode, Lilly didn't feel at all weird that her boss was now her husband.

By now Scotty was grinning, as Lilly walked right past him, "Save it", not really wanting to brag about her honeymoon. As she swung back into solving this heavy case; both barely had time to spend together. However having Christina back in her life; came in handy, since she seemed very excited ever since Lilly had gotten pregnant.

Somehow just after going shopping, both sisters headed down to Lilly's doctor for a routine sonogram. The look displayed on Christina's face; was on that Lilly probably would never forget. She knew in her heart that they both were making a memory together; just by watching her baby on the screen.

"Would you like to know the sex", her doctor asked.

Lilly shrugged, "No I like to be surprised", seeing the reaction on Christina's face.

"Why not Lil"?

The blonde let out a breath, "It's my first, and kind of would spoil the surprise for me if I had found out".

Just ten minutes after the sonogram had ended; the sisters said their goodbyes; since Lilly was being summoned to return back to headquarters. While in the middle of typing up her report, John placed a fast food bag on her desk.

"Everything go alright", knowing that his meeting had prevented him from being there. Turning her head a notch, she nodded before handing him a photo, "I didn't find out, want this one to be surprise".

With that said, he studied the picture, "Suspects in interview room 2, you want me to take a crack at him"?

Lilly shook her head; knowing that already her interview hadn't been typed up as of yet. Plus the fact she was busying herself with tracking the location of the killer from the office. Being pregnant didn't allow her to leave, especially now with this dangerous killer on the loose. This wasn't something that both John and Scotty were about to let her pursue in action.

In between that, John nearly was spending practically all night working on the nursery. He hadn't had a good dose of sleep in now a week. Not that that was affecting his job, but as wife Lilly knew that he was in need for one.

Just that night, she stopped him, "You need to sleep, and you can work on it over the weekend".

John let out sigh; "Got to make it nice", feeling their baby stirring, "You hungry Lil"?

"No, c'mon don't make me drag you".

He chuckled in amusement, "I'm fine Lil"; kissing her cheek, "Go to sleep".

With that said, she obeyed knowing that the fumes weren't safe. While Lilly was getting ready for bed, John busying himself by putting together the light oak dresser; but found that the instructions were only in Spanish.

Setting it aside, John knew he would have to ask Scotty for some assistance on that. In the meantime, he was able to put the crib together, before heading to bed around midnight.

Just as he had entered, he made a weird face, "Some sort of pregnancy ritual that I'm unaware of".

Lilly continued stretching, "It's yoga, and you should try it".

"Too late, I'm going to bed", seeing how stubborn John could become. Once he was in bed, she also lay down next to him, but it wasn't long before he started snoring loudly. Now with that erupting, Lilly hit him with a pillow, "John turn over, I can't sleep".

When he refused, Lilly sighed in frustration before trying to get some rest. By morning she was awakened by the sound of her partner's voice in the other room, yelling at John. As grumpy as Lilly had become, she wasn't in any kind of mood today.

Little did she know that her baby shower would in fact; move her to tears once she had seen the nursery.


	32. The very Lavish Baby Shower

When it came time to get Lilly out of the house, in order to start to decorate the house; the squad was able to do this without her figuring out what was up. Of course John made up a story about wanting to polish the floors; saying that it was simply too dull and needed a shine. Somehow she believed him due to seeing paint all over the top and bottom of John's clothes.

While Scotty did his best to keep Lilly from going near her house, Christina was already there turning her whole sister's downstairs into a lavish place for a baby shower to take place in. Though being an unprofessional decorator; she still had a lot of talent which came in handy. When both Jefferies and Vera arrived with the catering trays of food; they both were already arguing over it.

"Enough about the Tupperware", yelled Christina, "How does Lil even put with working with you"?

Vera groaned, as he then looked down at the candles which were adored with both pink and yellow lace; since the sex was still a surprise.

"Don't touch", came the second warning from her, "I want everything not touched", prompting the mean to walk away.

Meanwhile, Lilly continued to walk since she knew it always had helped her. Now into her fifth month of pregnancy; it had proved to be a good thing. Scotty then looked over, "I never seen you this happy Lil"?

"You have Scotty, but just don't realize it".

He didn't get her meaning, but then the two sat down together at a park, "You and I were so close before the shooting, but after it's like you had drifted from me".

Scotty released a breath, "Guess the shooting thing, and shook me up. It doesn't make me think of you any less. I'm still glad you're alive".

At this point, Lilly had taken his hand and placed it onto her abdomen. Right away, Scotty seemed awed by what he was feeling. Though he knew that this baby was something she had wanted for a very long time, but she then felt him gently caressing her stomach.

Somehow she found herself resting her head, against Scotty's shoulder. As he looked over, he felt a sense of happiness while sitting next to his best friend. Back at the house Vera was practically driving both Christina and Kat insane.

When he came across a tiny baby doll decoration, he grinned, "Any bets "?

"Put that down, Nick", Jefferies said, "There is a chance you might me wrong, baby could come out with a full head of hair".

Just then John came down, "Enough about it, we're not ruining this day for Lil", knowing that his squad's wisecracks were directed at him; in a teasingly way. Though he didn't take it seriously; he just hoped for a healthy baby.

Once the furniture was strategically arraigned; Kat had come back with the cake. She had specifically chosen both Vanilla and Chocolate for the inside; since neither of the squad really wanted Cream Cheese as a filling.

Plus the fact that it could come in handy for those midnight cravings; that Lilly was experiencing. Other than that, the place had now been turned into a lavish baby shower. Christina practically went without any sleep; but between her calculations and drawings; she had in fact created something wonderful.

Though there was strawberry wine in two of the glasses; Christina then poured in some non alcoholic punch into her sister's glass which was adored with pink and white all over it.

"Should be call Scotty, and tell him to bring Mommy Detective Home"?

Christina was still rummaging through her sister's kitchen, "No, I'm not quite finished", as John helped her decorate the new dining room table, "I'm glad that you and Lil had made up, she seems happier with having you back".

"We both screwed up John, but you know what Lil and I didn't have the easiest time growing up", seeing that he knew all about their childhood, "I'm glad you're good to her".

By the time the place was ready, everyone heard the sound of both Lilly and Scotty bantering like usual outside. As the front door had opened, the lights came on as everyone yelled" Surprise".

Looking around the room, Lilly's eyes caught the sight of a very lavish baby shower; taking place now in her own living area. She was pretty surprised by all of this, as John came closure to kiss her, before Jefferies moved forward to hug her. Lilly smiled happily, but still was very much quite surprised by all of this. She nearly wasn't expecting any of this to have happen,

What took the cake was seeing that it was all Christina's doing, but as they both shared a hug, everyone had noticed that Lilly was now crying softly, "Thank you Chris".

"I wanted to make this special for you", before the two posed for pictures.

At that point Kat came out, "Well until someone had managed to eat the half of the coffee cake".

Vera made a face until John spoke up, "I did, have hungry", which was a 360 from whom usually had eaten one at the office.

Upon walking around, Lilly was awed by the tiny baby things; before John let her back to the couch. Still newlyweds, he sat next to her holding her hand. While Scotty sat down on the other side, handing her a glass of punch, "I made it, there ain't any alcohol in this one".

Lilly smiled but wasn't in the mood to drink, before setting her drink down on the dazzling coasters. As the music played softly in the background; "You both knew about this"?

"Pretty much", shrugged Scotty, before Lilly had gotten up to speak with her sister in the kitchen. Standing by the corner; she was amazed by how hard her baby sister was working, "Have to hand it to you, I wasn't expecting this".

Christina looked up, "I'm not the train wreck you think I am Lil".

"Never really thought it deep down", is letting out breath, "I missed you a lot, but having you here is a good thing. Despite what had happened, I don't think of you the way I used to".

The younger woman had stopped," So what do you think of me now"?

"As my sister, whom is throwing me probably the most lavish party I've ever had", saying it with a smile. This made Christina's day, before seeing everyone getting up for some food. Once Lilly was in the middle of eating an Italian hero; with macaroni and potato salad; she couldn't help but laugh at some of her coworker's jokes.

Scotty then looked over, "So are you also going to keep the name a secret as well Lil"?

"I haven't really found a name I liked", as John then interrupted her, "I thought we discussed a few together".

"No you had, while keeping me up with that snoring of yours", making everyone chuckle in amusement.

John glanced over at his wife, "I don't snore Lil", seeing her arching an eyebrow at him, "Are you saying I also talk in my sleep".

Scotty chuckled amusingly, seeing just how funny their little argument had become, but kept his mouth shut. He knew that pissing off a pregnant woman during her baby shower wouldn't be the best thing in the world.

"I'm sleeping upstairs tonight".

Vera grinned wildly, "So I take it there's no action between you two", seeing them both shooting him a cold look.

Nevertheless, Lilly didn't go on with it; nor was she even mad at her husband. Just a little playful banter was all that was needed, until the gifts had started to come out. Inside were dresses, blankets, and toys indicating that both Christina and Kat wanted Lilly to have girl.

"You hoping for a son, John", asked Jefferies.

He chuckled before taking a sip of some beer, "I'll be fine with whatever it is".

Lilly shook her head, before pulling out a pink lacy dress, "Scotty, this is beautiful" her eyes now dripping with tears. Scotty then kissed her cheek, "I spend hours looking for something for the baby".

"So that's where you went for four entire hours",

Scotty shrugged, "Not quite".

"Having a little session with that girl of yours", teased Lilly seeing that she was in fact very much right. Not long after having a piece of the cake, John led his wife upstairs, while a blindfold covered her eyes. As he slowly opened the door, he then took away allowing her to see the beautiful nursery.

Lilly covered her mouth with her hand, in awe and happiness. She had never seen such a lavish nursery; one that was covered with light green walls, with oak wood furniture. Even the blankets inside of the crib, were a crisp white lace.

"John", she gasped, "How did you do this"?

Without a word he wrapped his arms around her stomach, as the two stood there in their future baby's room each full of happiness. From underneath his hand, he felt a series of small kicks. As Scotty then snapped a picture of the loving couple; he could see why they were so perfect for one another.

Just then Vera walked on into the room, holding up a bald headed baby doll, "I think this is what the baby might look like".

"I have a feeling that this baby might come out with your attitude, John".

He shook his head, "Already has your stubborn streak Lil".

"So any names yet", asked Scotty?


	33. Strange cravings and Names

Later on that night, Lilly was sitting in bed reading a book on baby names. Though there were so many names to choose from; she knew that they might have to come up with a few since they both didn't know what the sex of their child was.

Though John was working late tonight, she continued to flip through the pages; before falling asleep. During the next morning; Scotty had caught Lilly doing some" Research" on the computer.

"Browsing through baby names", peering over onto the screen.

Almost immediately, Lilly shut off the screen, "No not at all, just doing some research".

Scotty took a sip of his coffee, "What to name that bundle of joy".

Lilly shook her head, knowing that her partner was already getting on her nerves. Despite John working all night, she was practically up between the cravings and the movements of her baby. Though now her cravings were now set on cold pickles and pepperoni pizza... It was just her luck that Vera managed to come in with a box of pizza.

Almost immediately her eyes were fixed on the box, as Vera then opened it up. Upon taking two slices, both men looked at each other. With her mouth full; Lilly somehow managed to speak, "Where are the pickles"?

This made Vera grin but knew that she was a detective with very odd cravings. It was one thing to be craving a box of Cinnabons; but putting pickles on Pizza was yet another. Even Vera couldn't satisfy the blonde's cravings, somehow when John had come out of the office, he could see that his pregnant wife was already driving his squad crazy.

Giving him and innocent face, Lilly bit into another slice of pizza. At that point Jefferies grinned at John, "Thinking now it might be a boy"?

"Somehow I'm not even sure what it might be"?

Still with her mouth full, Lilly responded with, "A girl".

The men all looked at the blonde; knowing that was her wish. Although John didn't care what it was, he knew that both Scotty and Vera were setting bets on what sex the baby might be. However Vera was the one whom was practically placing money each day.

"You better save your money, I think I'm going to want another box of pizza later", Lilly called out while stretching her arms. The men groaned knowing that by having a pregnant detective wasn't practically the best thing.

"Had to knock her up boss"?

Putting on his glasses, John glanced over at his wife, "Knocking up is a crude term Nick", before heading out to a meeting. Shaking his head as well, Scotty glanced over into his coffee cup after a certain case; hoping that Kat wasn't about to poison him.

She also was grinning at the Cuban, seeing how he was staying away from her. When the it was just her and Lilly, Kat came closer; feeling the movements, "You look good pregnant Lil, maternal like".

Lilly smiled slightly, while she resumed typing up and e-mail. She knew that becoming pregnant felt good but due to her husband's snoring problems; sleep was no longer an option. Plus the fact that John hated sleeping on the daybed and the couch; that he probably was coming here to rest. Though the nursery had been finished; there still was minor things; like buying more clothes and selecting out a name.

By 5pm, Lilly got up and was ready to go home. Popping into her husband's office, she saw him still very much in work mode.

"You coming home tonight, or do I have to drag you"?

John looked over from what he was doing," I'll be home in an hour Lil, still have paperwork to finish", but Lilly moved closure, "Do it tomorrow".

He then pulled her close to him, giving Lilly a kiss on the cheek, "Go home, I'll promise I'll be there".

Just moments after his wife had left; John took off his glasses, thinking about their baby. He had made a promise to himself to not miss their baby's birth due to work; but deep down John was in fact nervous about having a child later in life.

When he comes home, he then handed a bouquet of flowers to Lilly. She shook her head, "You do something wrong"?

"I can't give you something, without being questioned"?

Lilly leaned forward as the two shared a small kiss, his hand then slide onto her stomach. For a moment the two said not a word; but enjoyed the movement of their baby together. Just moments after he had changed into some much more comfortable clothes; the two sat there watching some TV. She then opened a book on baby names.

"So we going to actually discuss what we're going to name it"?

John glanced over," I was think to wait to the day it's born", but saw the look displayed on his wife's face," Always had like that name Amelia".

The blonde wrote the name down, as a possibility, "What about Lauren or Madison", scanning her eyes down the page.

He then moved closure, "We'll know better when the baby is born, and I know it will be beautiful like you". At this point, Lilly's eyes turned dreamily; with a hint of a motherly look to her, "So you'll be out for three months"?

"No about a month, just want to spend some time with you and the baby", keeping his hand rested there. John knew that a newborn was a lot of work; but with his fatherly experience he knew he could handle having one.

For Lilly, she was experiencing parenthood for the first time. That was something that John wasn't going to take away from her. Upon hearing that she wanted to breastfeed made his eyebrows arch up even higher.

"We aren't going to use the formula, Lil"?

She leaned against his shoulder," Maybe when he or she's about six or seventh months old, I know that doing that is good for the baby. Besides it feels maternal to me to do that. I'll pump some out so that you can do some of the feedings".

For now they continued to watch some more TV, as Lilly let out a yawn. Getting up she went upstairs to change into her pajamas, but went into the nursery. Each time she had gone in there, more maternal feelings rushed highly into her bones. Lilly couldn't wait to be a mother, before sitting down in the rocking chair.

It just happened to be the same one that her mother had once rocked her in, upon picking up the book; The Velveteen Rabbit, Lilly promised herself that she would read this to her own child. Though it was probably one the memories she had left of her mother; she knew in her heart that her mother loved her.

As another month had progressed, Lilly had a long list of baby names. Too many for John to pick out, but he wanted to meet their baby before naming it. By now he made sure that their apartment was stocked with whatever she was craving that particular night.

One rainy night in particular, John was sent out with the rain beating down on his head; to make a mad dash to Taco Bell. Lilly now was craving not just one Taco but six; all with heavy sour cream. Just as he was about to head home; she called him wanting chips and medium salsa as well.

By the time he had arrived; soaking wet; Lilly sat up in middle happily eating her meal. John let out a tired groan before changing; he knew that her cravings were worsening. When he finally lay down in bed, he could hear Lilly snacking on some goldfish crackers.

"Lil is that even normal", seeing her putting them into the soft taco; before Lilly had poured on some sauce onto it.

"Ask the baby, all I've been doing is eating", shoving the taco into her mouth. John could barely stand the smell of it; since Vera had eaten six bean burritos. Between both him and Lilly; he wasn't about to eat anything.

Upon seeing Lilly eating the salsa with a spoon; John then took the spoon away, "Lie on your side", he instructed her. Placing a warm towel over her stomach; he could hear his wife release a series of long deep breaths.

Then John rubbed some cocoa butter onto her pale skin, soothing Lilly. She always slept better this way, especially when he began massaging her back. He then stopped when he saw that his wife was now very much asleep.

Giving her a kiss, John then turned over hoping to get a descent night's sleep. What he wasn't expecting was Lilly was about to embark on a wild baby shopping spree along with Christina that would have the two each driving each other insane.


	34. Getting ready for the baby

As both Lilly and Christina, swarmed the baby outlet; racking up sales and discounts on baby clothes. They clearly were having a blast as Lilly bought what was needed so she could eventually pump out some milk; so that John could do some of the feedings as well. Aside from that, she also bought several books and toys.

"It would be a whole lot better, if you knew the sex of it Lil", Christina said while browsing through several racks of clothes. Placing a hand there Lilly, knew that she felt better not finding out, "Next time I will Chris, I want this one to remain a surprise".

Christina shrugged while still browsing through other racks of clothes, but by the end the sisters both blew around $500; just on that one store. Then the two headed on over to the mall to shop for each other and stop for a bite to eat. While there the they caught Scotty with his girlfriend, heading into Victoria's Secret.

"I don't think he knows really how to love," Christina said in a low voice, "Scotty acts like he thinks he does".

Lilly shook her head, "So why did you even go out with him"?

"I was dumb Lil, have someone better now", before hearing her sister's cell ringing loudly. Upon picking it up, Lilly knew that she have overspent, which wasn't a good thing. John had told her not to do this, and gave her a specific amount to go up to. Plus the fact, things were extremely tight for the two of them.

By the time that Lilly had gotten home, she hid the stuff away. It didn't take very long for John to find the receipts since her accidently had left it somewhere. He became furious at his wife; as the two began arguing over it.

"A part of it was Chris, I didn't spend $500 on my card", she yelled, "Besides I only spent about 100 which are what we both agreed on, do the math".

John scanned through the receipts before realizing that a part of it was paid in cash; while the other half was through her credit card, "No more Lil, wait until the baby arrives".

"What about Diapers and supplies, we are going to need that".

"Eventually, your only six months along. I don't want you going out and spending one more dime", was prompting her to shake her head in agreement. Then Lilly had spotted that he was also guilty of buying stuff, "Seems like you can't stop shopping either".

He glanced over at the bag, before seeing a smile breaking onto her face, "Makes me think you are doing some undercover baby shopping at work"?  
John let out a sigh, before they both agreed not to spend any more money. Except that now Lilly grew hungry which made him not as eager to run out; besides her cravings changed daily. Other than that, he quickly calmed down; knowing that the stress wasn't good for their baby.

That and the two eventually sat down to watch a movie together, but Lilly's mind was still on the baby. She couldn't help but to feel maternal while being pregnant; somehow their VCR had broken down during it.

"About time we get a DVD player", seeing his reaction, "I'm not about to replace that one anytime soon".

"You think you have enough of this reality shows on tape, Lil"?

Lilly laughed softly, "Keeps me occupied when you work overnight, you wouldn't have to if you stopped snoring".

He shook his head, "That's because this one is always hungry", planting a kiss on her stomach. The two shared a moment looking into each other's eyes before; Lilly released a breath, "Speaking of which, whose going to cook tonight me or you"?

"Chinese takeout sound good to you", not feeling up to cooking at the moment.

Lilly leaned closure, "Just no Kung Pao chicken, last time Kat almost had Nick's head for reaching for her meal".

John chuckled in amusement, "Now it's her and Scotty bantering back and forth, reminds me of when you two used to do that".

"Are we talking about work again"?

"You brought it up", seeing her hands motioning to the menu, "Alright I'm ordering it Lil".

While they had waited for their order to arrive, the two sat there listening to their baby's heartbeat on some of those devices; that Lilly had just recently bought. She still couldn't get over how fast the heartbeat was; but it was symbol to her of a new life growing deep inside of her warm body.

He also was amazed by what he was hearing, before taking off the headphones, "Got three months more to go before we have a baby here".

Lilly leaned back, "That's it, I feel like I'm been pregnant for a hundred years. Plus I'm hungry and fat".

"You're not fat"

The blonde pointed to her swelling abdomen, "I even waddle like Nick, and I'm a cow John".

"You'll get over it Lil".

"Yeah, yeah you're just saying it because you want your skinny wife back".

John chuckled, as he got up to pay the delivery guy before handing her the bag. After closing the door he then sat down, "I didn't marry you for that reason; you know that"?

As the two dug into their meals, Lilly remained quiet before they spotted that very same couple on TV; acting stupid. Plus the fact, her husband was acting as if he was fifteen age.

"Glad you're not sinking to that low".

"Wouldn't even try, but you're a better looking woman that she is", seeing how blue her eyes really were, as he then captured her lips.

Lilly smiled softly, before letting him feed her lovingly. However as far as names were concerned; the two still didn't know what quite to name it. Each day she was coming up with a new one; but down at the office the squad was pitching out more names.

None of them really had grabbed them, but John was very concerned that Lilly was overeating. Plus the fact she was craving even odder stuff; to the point that she went in for another checkup. This time he went with her; knowing that their baby's health was very important.

During the sonogram, the doctor informed them that their baby was completely healthy and that Lilly's weight gain was normal and not over the limit. She then looked over at him, "You want to find out"? John shook his head, knowing that he still wanted it to be a surprise. This way the two could both be surprised on the day of its birth.

Afterwards, while Lilly was busying herself on the case; Scotty met John outside.

"Nervous about having a baby boss", he asked.

"I was before I had my daughter, but Lil's nervous about becoming a mother".

Scotty came closure, "Good thing you're already a pro at this; parenting stuff Boss. It's a good thing that this happened to Lil; she deserves to have kids".

John released a breath, but knew that he wasn't nervous as his wife. For that he was able to soothe her nerves later on that night; that would lead to more romance and quite possible a trip before the birth of their baby.


	35. Winter blues and a rose ready to bloom

While back on the road, Lilly wasn't at all pleased about John rushing her to be on the road at 6pm. Although they had wanted to go to ski resort since the hotel was supposed to be nice; this wasn't the day to be out traveling. It was already snowing outside, as she groaned not too pleased about John persistence in driving all the way up to the roads of Maine.

Instead the two slammed into heavy traffic, while Lilly grew impatient. Though now she was now into her seventh month; both her cravings and mood swings had worsen. However John understood but not always; especially when she would be in a pissy mood all day. He usually went to Jones to have a couple of drinks with Jefferies when things really had gotten back.

For now, she sat there bored. Plus the fact that her back was aching miserably; but remained quiet while watching the snow falling down harder on the expressway.

"This is fitting", she finally said sulking.

John let out a sigh, still ignoring the directions. He knew he had his own method of driving; this time she practically drove him nuts to obey it. Lilly wanted to be there, and not have to take a million no name side roads in order to get there.

While driving, he stopped once for gas; while pausing to look at his wife. Her hand was rested on her stomach; protecting their unborn child inside. Though Lilly was pretty much fast asleep, as John then got into the car, for a moment he listened to the sound of her breathing in and out softly.

His hand then moved a tendril of hair away from her forehead, exposing her beautiful face. John knew that motherhood was truly meant for Lilly; seeing how maternal she had already gotten. As he then started the engine up again; he continued to drive until hearing the sound of his wife's voice.

"Where are we", she yawned.

John had relatively no clue where he was, but simply answered, "Where somewhere".

"Lost I presume", her eyes scanning around, "I take it you didn't bother to read the directions", seeing how ignorant he had become, "Damn it John, this isn't the time to be doing this".

He knew that he was already lost as is; but wouldn't man up to it. Instead he kept on driving; while Lilly grew restless with a full bladder; "Pull over I need to pee".

"Can't, I haven't seen a restroom for miles".

Lilly groaned, feeling both the aches from her back and the cravings of more food. She knew that this car trip wasn't exactly thrilling; especially while pregnant. Aside from that, the baby continued kicking softly; while she peered downward, "Its okay, I know you're hungry".

Though it felt very maternal to speak to her unborn baby, Lilly saw it as beautiful thing. Besides she would sometimes sit in bed and read to it; knowing that it would hear the sound of her voice. For now, she really needed to use the bathroom.

When they finally saw a sign, the snow already had created low visibility combined with icy roads. However John knew that it wasn't safe for a pregnant woman to hold it in for a long period of time; but then the two saw the sign that both rest rooms were out of order.

"Great and I'm hungry as well".

John was in need of some coffee also, "Next stop Lil, I could use a cup of coffee", before he turned back onto the freeway. From that point on the two faced icy driving conditions, until stopping at the next rest stop. There Lilly immediately rushed into the bathroom; while he bought some food and also withdrew some money.

Due to the conditions, the two had no other choice than to spend a night a motel. Once inside, John wrapped Lilly up in a blanket from the car. She shivered slightly, due to the coldness in the air as he then lay down beside her.

Before her eyes had closed, she felt his lips kissing the side of her cheek. By morning, the two had to spend another day since the roads were still considered hazardous.

Lilly threw down the remote, frustrated that there wasn't anything on; besides sitting in dump motel room; with very little to do; before seeing John sitting there playing solitaire.

"Some vacation huh", seeing him chuckling, "So were you really planning on taking me up to Maine"?

"No, but someplace nice; don't think we'll have the chance after the baby is born".

The blonde raised her eyebrows at him, "You saying we might get a chance to do this", sitting now seductively on his lap, "Doing this", while proceeding to devour his lips. Their breaths each grew harder from the kiss, before Lilly got up and leaned downward continuing to kiss him.

Somehow his hands wandered underneath his shirt, feeling her swelling abdomen. Lilly broke away, which John immediately sensed that she didn't feel beautiful; not at this stage anyways. She then peered down, "I look like a cow"?

"You don't Lil", exposing her stomach, "You look beautiful as mother to be".

Lilly glanced over at her reflection in the mirror, before placing her own hand there. While watching her own reflection; her thoughts started to run deep about her unborn child, living inside of her. She knew it was warm and wet; but also knew that it could hear the sound of her own heartbeat.

"Do you think the baby hears how damaged my heart is", saying her thoughts loudly.

John looked up knowing that, Lilly had been through a lot in her life, "Your hearts not damaged Lil, I know that it feels just how much you and I both love it", seeing how lost Lilly was deep in her inner emotions.

Moving closure he then kissed her cheek, "Need to stop blaming yourself Lil for your past; you know you can't change it. I can't change what mistakes I had made, but I know I'm a better husband than before".

Her eyes then met up with his; somehow from that little conversation of theirs Lilly began to feel much better. Even when they had arrived the resort, in which the two spent their time; dancing and having a good time.

One evening, Lilly lay back in the whirlpool tub that was up on a pedestal so to speak. Large tile adored it, while hot water poured out from the facet. She felt the vibrations from the jets; propelling the water around.

During her meditation, a large array of flashes began to appear. First it was one of her mother reading to her as a kid; her father, Scotty, Christina and finally John. They were all people that she loved; but then saw a vision of her on the day that she had been shot. Remembering how John was right by her side when she had awakened.

He had always been there for her, but upon opening up her eyes; Lilly knew that marrying him was the most wonderful thing in her life. Now being pregnant, she couldn't wait to hold her baby in her arms for the first time.

Then Lilly felt warm water been poured down her back, she breathed in deeply. While seeing John rubbing the soles of her feet; he had that romantic side to him that had been buried for so long.

"You pamper me way too much, "saying it with a smile.

The room was dark except for the burning of candles, "That's a bad thing Lil"?

"No, but I never would have suspected that you had this side to you John, or we're you just pretending to be shy all along".

He looked at his wife," Who said that I was being shy, just hadn't felt that way in a long time. Didn't think I was capable of getting you pregnant"?

Lilly laughed softly, "I think you were shy, making me be the one to push you over the edge".

The look on his face was priceless, before playfully splashing water at her. She tried to pull him in unsuccessfully, "Come in or are you embarrassed to share a tub with me"?

"I rather watch you", rubbing her feet. Lilly shook her head, before he helped her up out of the tub. As he then wrapped a warm towel around her body; he held her closure to him. In the mirror, Lilly saw herself being loved and wanted by a man whom meant the whole world to her.

Even when they walked outside, and enjoyed other activities; Lilly considered herself to be happy in her marriage. Though the two were still newlyweds; both were deeply devoted to each other. Somehow this entrusted in a snowball fight outdoors; until Lilly had accidently hit him in the eye.

Though mainly it was John's fault for not moving out of the way so soon, by the time they had gotten back people were staring at him.

"You do something to Lil, Boss", Scotty asked.

John turned around, "No we just had a snowball fight".

"You having a snowball fight with Lil', grinned Vera, "Trying to be younger for her"?

"Has nothing to do with that, anyways Lil started it"?

Lilly shot him a look, "I wouldn't say that", looking even more pregnant than before.

Once inside his office, Jefferies came in, "You needed to see me"?  
"Yeah, I need you to cover for me tonight. Lil's going to Lamaze class, I need to be there"?

Jefferies grinned, "So I hear that the trip went well, seeing how happy she looks"?  
"Not the trip going there, I hate to admit this one but I don't think Lil was too pleased about me taking some shortcut. She kept on complaining, first about having the use the bathroom then her cravings"?

"That's normal for her being pregnant", until hearing both Kat and Scotty arguing outside until Lilly had stepping into his office, as John looked up at her, "Take your maternity leave now Lil".

The blonde looked at her husband before Jefferies then left to give them both some privacy, John knew that it was best for his wife to be home relaxing. Somehow she obeyed knowing that he was still her boss; and that his best interests were good.

After arriving at home, Lilly saw that Christina was there. Having her little sister there to keep her company was good; until she had to leave due to her new business as an interior decorator. Being all alone was fine; except when she had received the news that Kat was pregnant with Scotty's child.

Now things were going to get even stranger at work, but it wasn't fun when she reached her ninth month and was past her due date.


	36. A tiny little Rose

While still awaiting the birth of her baby, Lilly was glad that Scotty was there to keep her company. Being a week overdue wasn't fun; plus feeling like a fat cow wasn't helping much. However when Scotty started to rub her feet, she looked up not expecting her best friend to ever be doing this.

"Red toenails", he teased, "You actually take off your socks", referring to workaholic status. Lilly shot him a look, before letting out another sigh, "Be nice if this one would come out already, I think it doesn't".

A smile crept onto his face, but then saw that Lilly had fallen asleep. Pulling up a blanket closure to her, Scotty took a minute to listen to the sound of her breathing knowing that he was still very much thankful that she was still alive. Just an hour after he had left, John came back seeing his beautiful wife lying there asleep.

He knew that Lilly was uncomfortable being pregnant at this point; but knew that if the baby didn't arrive soon; her doctors were going to have to induce her. For now he saw her eyes slowly opening, before John bent down to kiss her.

"You sleep Lil", whispering softly, before she slowly sat up.

Lilly then let out a deep sigh; "This baby doesn't seem like it wants to come out", feeling his hand gently rubbing her back. John knew her frustrations of being pregnant and overdue; as he then gently stroked her stomach, lovingly. "I hate to admit this, but I'm going to miss being able to feel this".

"Until you decided to knock me up for a second time", groaning loudly.

John ignored her comment, shrugging it off knowing that she wanted another baby after this one, but for now he remained supportive and caring. However a few days later, while in the car with both Scotty, Vera and Jefferies; all of a sudden Lilly felt several strong contractions; knowing now that her baby was on its way.

Jefferies glanced over, hearing the way the blonde was breathing, "You going in to Labor Lil"?

She let out another painful moan; prompting Scotty to speed up. As the Taurus darted through Philly traffic, Scotty whipped around corners; while driving like a complete manic. Somehow Scotty took the wrong turn and landed on the other side of Philly; making Lilly practically screams in pain at him.

Vera looked up, "Scotty go already, Lil's having the baby".

When the car swerved a few times; more pain shot right through her, "Get me to the hospital Valens", yelling this time.

By the time, Scotty had arrived at the hospital; Lilly was wheeled into the room but was determined that she wasn't ready to deliver for while. Plus the fact she was only slightly dilated; adding to her frustrations even more.

When John arrived, he immediately took her hand. Lilly breathed out while still counting her contractions, "Get this out of me, NOW", yelling in pain.

"Breathe Lil, you're doing well", blotting the top of her forehead. He then fed her some ice chips before a doctor came in to check up on her. Somehow John was able to get Lilly up, as the two walked around the halls; before she bent over breathing harder.

He continued rubbing her back, until they came back to the room. From there he breathed with her; knowing that she was in a lot of pain. Within twelve hours; Lilly was ready to deliver as she gripped John's hand very tightly. As he coached her, she pushed hard while crying, "I can't do this".

The doctors were encouraging her to push while Lilly begged him to make it stop. Although she felt her husband still holding onto her hand tightly; she wanted the pain to go away now.

"Please", as another painful contraction shot right through her.

"I see the head now", as John blotted her sweaty forehead, "One more, you can do it", seeing her drawing in a deep breath; before pushing harder.

At the exactly moment, John witnessed something so amazingly beautiful; their baby drawing in its first breath, while hearing the doctor announce, "It's a girl".

Lilly lay back, still panting but feeling very happy about having a little girl of her own. As she continued crying; John was allowed to cut her umbilical cord; while peered down at his youngest daughter. He too was amazed by how beautiful she was; especially having the same skin tone as her mothers.

While the nurses cleaned her off; John turned back to his wife, "I'm proud of you Lil", giving her a kiss, "Gave me a beautiful daughter".

By now her tears were of happiness, especially when they placed her little girl into her arms for the first time. There Lilly peered down in awe and love over how precious she looked, "Hey you", giving her a kiss, "You didn't want to come out of me didn't you"?

John also kissed their daughter; he also was beaming of happiness. Already being a father, he didn't have that first time nervousness; but took having another daughter as a sign of contentment in his life. Sitting down on the bed watching her sucking softly on Lilly's breast, the two parents looked briefly at each other in awe.

"I think you should name her, Lil", whispering softly.

With that said, Lilly peered down thinking of the best name, "Amelia Michelle Stillman", saying it with a small smile.

He nodded in agreement, before see that Amelia had fallen back to sleep on his wife's chest. When Lilly felt her daughter breathing with her; skin to skin; she remembered what Priscilla Chapin had said about the night her son, Max was born.

Somehow when John held her, Lilly could see just how paternal he had become. Seeing their daughter resting against his chest, while he softly rocked her; was something else.

"Good thing you already were one before she was born", Lilly whispered.

John wasn't listening, but instead was bonding with Amelia. In this moment, nothing else had seemed to matter to him; not even the current case. This time he learned that he could in fact balance both work and home life; without making one of them a major priority.

Just moments after he had soothed Amelia back to sleep, the rest of the squad came in seeing just how good he was a dad.

Vera groaned knowing that he was owning Scotty over five hundred dollars, "Kid's got hair", seeing John becoming protective over his littlest girl, "Amelia's all Lil, but she has some of me in her".

"I think mine will also", as Kat groaned in disgust, "How did I even land up sleeping with you"?

Scotty chuckled in amusement, "Ever since that time you had kissed me in the car", before seeing her scurrying into the bathroom, making him feel like a very nervous dad to be.

Even John chuckled as well, but knew that he had felt that very same way when his eldest daughter; Janie was born. With Amelia he already had the experience which made him less nervous; but with Lilly that was an entirely different story.

As he then placed Amelia back into Lilly's arms, she cradled her softly. While the rest of the squad left, she remained there alone with her little girl, knowing that now there would be another rose added to their bed of roses.

However both John and Lilly were facing more sleepless nights ahead, plus having to deal with both a case and her sister's new pregnancy as well.


	37. Baby love

While Lilly was sitting up in bed holding Amelia, she looked around as the flowers that were given to her. Pink balloons also hung in the air, making the new mother feel extremely happy and proud to become one. As she then peered down at her sleeping daughter; Lilly smiled happily. She had never felt this quite maternal before; but knew that she was holding something very special in her arms.

Outside it was snowing; which made Lilly turn and watch the white flowing substance falling out of the clouds; but knew that Amelia was nice and warm lying against her chest. Though the labor aspect as long and painful, she was just finally glad to be holding her little girl. Just then Scotty came in holding a bouquet of pink roses.

"Hey", he whispered before coming closure. Peering into the blanket, he saw just how beautiful and tiny she looked, "She's beautiful, Lil".

Lilly gave a small smile, before Scotty sat down next to her. He couldn't even take his eyes off Amelia for one moment; but he continued to stroke her cheek softly. To him he was awed by the fact that his partner and best friend was now a mother of such a precious little girl.

He then kissed Amelia's cheek, before seeing her tiny fingers wrapped around his, making even Lilly smile, "I think she likes you, Scotty".

As Scotty held her, he felt this moment of calmness. Though he was a father to be himself, being an uncle to Amelia meant the whole world to him. Then Scotty looked up at Lilly, "You got another chance at life, after I saved you. Gave this one life, I'm proud of you Lil'.

She could hardly retain the tears that now were streaming downward. Once Amelia was back into her arms, Lilly cried even more, as Scotty then held her", you're a fighter Lil, always are. I think she's just as strong as you".

At this point, Scotty then kissed his partner on the cheek, "I'll see you later, Lil", knowing that she would want some privacy.

While lying back, Lilly continued to listen to the sound of her daughter breathing in and out. For John he was thrilled about having another daughter, especially knowing that already Amelia had changed his life. In fact John was glad that his second marriage was teaching him how to love again; but also be a better man as well.

As he then came into the room, John the carefully took Amelia into his arms. While rocking her gently, John then glanced upward at his now sleeping wife.

"I know that you are your Mommy's wish", speaking softly, "Having you means so much to us", knowing that in fact, his age wasn't even a factor when it came to being a father or being a husband for that matter.

Now they were a family of three, which made him even more thrilled. Then Lilly opened her eyes, seeing John bonding with their daughter.

"She hungry"?

"I don't think she is, been pretty quiet", he whispered, "How are you feeling"?

Lilly sat up. "Tired but happy, you do look good holding Amelia".

John smiled softly, before seeing both Janie and Sean walking in. When she peered over into the blanket, Janie smiled as well, "She looks nothing like you Dad".

"You do", giving her a kiss, before Janie hugged Lilly, "You look better than I had".

Lilly shook her head, "I was able to rest since Amelia was a little late", as she got up to also hug Sean as well. He too was curious about the new baby, but John was good about introducing him.

"He's been wanting me to have another baby", seeing Lilly shaking her head, "I think one more after her will do it for us".

John then walked over towards his wife, as Lilly then cradled Amelia in her arms. As his daughter and grandson left the room; Lilly was then able to breastfeed in private. It was amazing to see how the newborn sucked at her breast, but it was a powerful bond between them.

Later on after visiting hours were over, she lay back feeling that happiness of being a new mother. While Lilly then drifted off to sleep; John sat there having a drink with his squad but since he wasn't a new dad; he wasn't bragging on and on about his newest daughter. However just the mention of a baby, sent Scotty running into the bathroom.

He was in fact so nervous about becoming a dad, which he was practically throwing up from it. Aside from that everyone was in a good mood, but John left early to make sure the house looked in order, for when Amelia came home the next afternoon.

Upon stepping foot in the nursery, he knew his hard work had paid off before placing a small pink rose in a vase that was sitting on top of a dresser. Back in the hospital, Lilly was in hell especially with annoying roommate whom wasn't too thrilled about having a baby.

In fact, she constantly was yelling at the nurses; rousing Lilly from what would have been a deep sleep. Somehow just as she was trying to fall back to sleep; one of them came in with Amelia; since it was now time for another feeding.

Just moments after Amelia had fallen asleep; Lilly could feel her breathing in and out softly. Her little girl was probably the most beautiful baby in the world to her, " I love you so much", kissing her cheek several times, " I'll see you in the morning", knowing that tomorrow night both she and John would get to have their moments bonding with their daughter together.

By the time the two were released, and went home; Lilly immediately lay in bed with Amelia on her chest. John lay close, as his hand gently stroked her tiny cheek, "Scotty's right, she was mini you".

"I think she has a tiny bit of you in her, it's hard to tell still", but when Amelia lay on his chest he lay there just staring down at his little girl. To him, just seeing the baby that they had both made in love amazed him.

In his eyes, John wouldn't have it any other way; having a little girl was perfectly fine with him. Though other cops were constantly asking if he had wanted a son; he now answered that he was just happy with having two daughters.

Besides he was already used to just having one; now with the addition of Amelia; John felt luckier to have two now.

"You still feel like an old dad", asked Lilly?

John laughed softly, "No, I don't think it will matter to her; just as long as she knows that I love her".

Those words meant something to Lilly, but as she continued to watch him bond with their daughter, even as John got up to rock her gently in his arms. He took to caring for Amelia like a pro, but as the days began to roll on by; the two were up all night trying to calm her down.

Even Lilly tried everything but then heard the sound of silence, before seeing both father and daughter both asleep on the couch. Coming closure, John then opened up his eyes, "Finally got her to fall asleep, and took me awhile though".

"You could have gotten me".

John let out a small breath, "I wanted you to sleep, and you have some milk for her in the fridge"?

"Just pumped some out before", seeing how devoted he was as a dad.

Somehow the next morning, John dropped by headquarters to check on everything. Though he was plain tired from being up all night; he still didn't feel like coming back. Besides John had another month to go before returning back; but was glad he got to spend it both with his wife and new daughter.

Jefferies was glad to see him, "You look wiped, John", shaking his hand.

"I was up all night trying to get Amelia to fall back to sleep".

The other man shook his head," So you thinking about coming back early"?

John sighed, "No, I can't leave Amelia yet", knowing that he didn't want to be separated from her as of yet. Besides being here at work felt odd to him, "I just stopped by to see how things were going", before he walked out, surprisingly he didn't ask once about the case.

Meanwhile, Christina had stopped by to see her little niece. Like everyone else she was awed by just seeing the beautiful newborn, but as the two sisters each looked at Amelia; both were thinking about their own mother.

Glancing down at the book, Christina knew that their mother would only read it to Lilly at times. Now she was carrying on the same tradition but just a minute late the two each began to read it to Amelia together.

Then Lilly then realized something different about her sister, especially noticing that she was now starting to show. Perhaps this was a good thing, but as the two sisters bonded over little Amelia; John was walking home with something for his daughter and for Lilly as well. He then saw both Kat and Scotty arguing on the streets.

They stopped abruptly when they had met up with him, "Don't you two have a case to solve".

Scotty nodded, "We were um coming from the doctors, Boss".

John finished putting on his gloves, "Don't tell me, and tell Will I'm on paternity leave. Another thing" taking Scotty aside, "Relax around Miller, she's already has gone through pregnancy before. You're going to turn her into how Lil had gotten just a month before Amelia was born".

"Yeah but I don't have to live with Lil".

The older man looked at her, "Don't play down my wife Scotty, take it from someone that has been a father for twenty eight years, and been married twice already", knowing that his advice probably wouldn't been taken.

Upon arriving home, both he and Lilly met up with a kiss. Though the kiss got very demanding, she needed to feel his lips on hers; needing to relish this. Somehow the two continued to kiss each other before the two went upstairs, standing in front of their daughter's crib while watching her sleep.

However once John had gone back to work, he had found out that Kat was now expecting twins and Christina was getting married in two years. Somehow things between him and Lilly had blossomed but now the two were in the market to search for a house of their own.


	38. Settling into a family of Three

While the two searched for a house around Philly, Lilly was kept busying between constant feedings and diaper changes. However one night when she finally went out to attend a Pilate's class, John found himself fine with taking care of their daughter. Though he liked having his own time with her; tonight things had seemed to be much calmer.

A few minutes later, while John was giving Amelia her bedtime bottle; he was doing some research on some homes for sale in the area. Nothing had seemed to really catch his eyes; given that some of the places were in areas where he didn't want his family to live.

Between the money issue and among other things; John sat back watching Amelia now asleep in his arms, knowing that living here wasn't such a terrible thing. Besides the neighborhood was good; and their apartment was comfortable as well. In his mind, John knew if they did eventually have another baby, the living areas would become a little tight.

For now he was just plain content with holding Amelia in his arms. As the front door opened, Lilly walked in seeing how both father and daughter were each bonding with each other; she smiled before heading on over to the couch.

As the two shared a small kiss, John peered up into a sea of blue but then felt his wife now resting her head down on his shoulder. While the two still looked at their daughter with love, Lilly knew that she was very much conceived in love.

John could hear both the soft breathings of both Lilly and Amelia, as he continued to listen to them both breathing in softly. He felt lucky to have been able to have found someone that would completely change his life; in a way it was more like fate than anything else. Besides it made him realize that even he needed to be loved himself.

"She's been asleep for awhile", he whispered, "How did go tonight"?

Lilly nodded, "Fine, you been scouring the internet looking for homes", seeing now an error message on the screen, knowing that John still wasn't so efficient in using a laptop nevertheless, a computer.

"It's best that we stay here for the time being, the neighborhoods I saw weren't something that I would want my family to live in", keeping in mind where Lilly had grown up in. Besides John felt comfortable living here in Center City; but knew that his wife probably felt different.

For the time being she followed him upstairs, watching how John gently placed Amelia down into her bassinet by their bedside. Already he was very overprotective over her; which wasn't a bad thing. Now as the two curled up together, Lilly was still feeling the shocks about now being a mother herself.

She quickly embraced her motherhood; spending time reading and singing to her daughter. Lilly had promised herself that she would do her best to give Amelia a better childhood than she had herself.

"I guess I have to fix the computer now, since you broke it".

John chuckled, "It was working fine when I was using it; probably just did something when I went to check on something"?

"Work related" she answered chiming in.

He knew his wife all too well, "No I don't even know what case there working on right now; not since you became a mom".

Lilly nodded tiredly, fighting her body's senses of wanting to sleep. Besides the fact she still had to pump out some more milk; and fix her laptop. Just a few moments after doing it, Lilly placed the milk into a container before starting to work on her computer. This time John didn't cause the blue screen of death to appear; but now there were about fifteen popup ads on her computer.

"Crap", muttering softly before clicking back on the block. While running a problem and a virus scan, she noticed that John was also searching for sports scores. Very typical of him, but at least he wasn't in work mode.

Just a week later, the weather had warmed up a notch as the now family of three went for their first walk together. Lilly now wearing a baby sling; felt a huge sense of happiness as a first time mother. However their walk wouldn't remain quiet as the two saw both Kat and Scotty still arguing in the streets.

"Some people aren't meant to be together", speaking softly.

John took her hand protectively, "Let's get out of here before they see us", wanting to enjoy their walk together. While they heard the two yelling over having fraternal twins; and Scotty's arguments of wanting to move in was certainly causing people to stare.

For the other family, things were going smoothly except the lack of sleep; plus Christina's frequent calls to Lilly regarding pregnancy questions. It had finally gotten so bad that John told her not to call in the middle of the night or very early in the morning. Aside from that, the two then decided to remain in the row home due to financial difficulties.

As the first month rolled on by, John was forced to return to work since the money was getting tighter. He wasn't about to send Lilly back anytime soon; wanting her to remain at home until her maternity leave was up; which was when Amelia had turned three months.

During his first day back, he felt different about being back instead of being with both his wife and daughter. However dealing with both Kat and Scotty's little annoying bantering was practically giving him a splitting headache so much that John kept the door to his office closed. Between doing four interrogations and controlling an out of control suspect, and paper work, John knew that there wasn't any way for him to leave the office that night.

Back at home, Lilly was trying to relax when Scotty had come over. He was looking a little agitated; but glad to see her face.

"I felt like I haven't seen you for awhile", he said seeing how tired she was looking. Lilly sighed when he took a seat down on her couch, "Scotty this isn't a good time, I need to sleep", holding open the door.

The cold air brushed against his skin, "Look Lil, I need to talk to you", raising his voice.

"Will you keep your voice down" hearing Amelia crying out from upstairs, "You have to leave, NOW", seeing Scotty getting up. Lilly didn't have any patience to be dealing with a nervous daddy to be, on top of dealing with her snoring husband as well.

Then her cell rang, but Lilly breathed a sigh of relief when she saw whom the number belonged to, "Hey", answering softly.

"You trying to sleep Lil", John asked slightly worried about his wife's lack of sleep.

Lilly groaned, "I was until you called".

"Sleep Lil, I love you", those words always comforted her. However she knew that she only slept well if he was lying beside her; call it crazy but Lilly liked to sleep feeling both protected and loved. When John finally returned home around 2am, he leaned over kissing her soft lips. Right away Lilly pulled him down, relishing the taste of his lips on hers.

Pulling away slowly, John then covered her with a blanket; knowing that in his mind he had already planned out their first year anniversary dinner together. He wanted it to be perfect, knowing that their romance between them only had gotten stronger. The place that they were going to would be one that Lilly probably would never forget.


	39. 1st year Anniversary

It had been four months since the arrival of their daughter, and a year since their wedding. Now wearing a red spaghetti strap dress, Lilly walked into the lavish restaurant in Chestnut Hill. Though her figure was back, she hated the fact that her top half was still big; due to still breastfeeding. However, she had a scarf wrapped around disguising anyone from looking there.

After being escorted to the table, Lilly sat down in front of a burning candle. She felt odd until seeing a bouquet of red roses being placed down in front of her. Upon looking up John stood there looking very handsome in the same suit, that he was wearing early on.

With a small kiss, he then sat down, "Look you beautiful tonight".

She blushed, knowing that she did in fact feel that way, but sighed when she couldn't still drink any wine. Lilly somehow managed to drink some ice water instead, as John looked over at her, eying her cleavage.

Almost immediately she tried to cover it up, but saw that her husband like what he was seeing," Don't tell me you want a picture of me to hide in your office", she teased after the pinup girl case.

He chuckled in amusement, "Would last very long in there", seeing him pulling out the camera.

"Don't you dare", seeing the flash going off. Lilly shook her head, "Got pinup Fantasies about me John, I don't know about"?

The look on his face was priceless but he didn't answer, prompting her to crack a small laughter, "So that's what you've been dreaming about".

"I don't dream Lil", teasing her.

Lilly shivered from the coldness, "So might I ask is how you got reservations to this place"?

"I have connections", trying to be secretive, "Thought it be nice to take you here, since it is our one year anniversary".

When the waiter came, the two ordered their meals before John looked at his wife, remembered how she looked when coming down the aisle, " I do have one in my office of you on our wedding day; didn't know at the time you were carrying our little girl".

The blonde smile while taking a sip of water, "Amelia kicked up a storm while I was walking down the aisle, guess she heard how fast my heart was going".

"I think Scotty was even breathless, how you looked. He did tell me to take care of you at the altar", his hand touching hers.

She then eyed her wedding ring; remembering how John slipped it onto her finger that day. From the look in his eyes to their kiss was probably the most wonderful thing at the moment. Given her a daughter was something she had wanted for a long time, which at the time was growing inside.

"So what other romantic things do you have in mind for tonight"?

John chuckled a bit, seeing how Lilly was grinning at him. He did feel lucky to be with such a beautiful woman whom had become his wife a year ago today; but like the compliments about her having a model's body; which he had kept to himself.

As the two ate their dinners, each kept glancing upward eying each other. When the music had started to play, he automatically led her onto the dance floor. Somehow the two had seemed to be the best dancers out on the floor, but Lilly's eyes remained closed while listening to the band playing on. When the beat got faster; she was certainly heated up the floor.

Just moments after she had finished dancing, the two left and headed towards a hotel for the night. From there Lilly came out dressed like a 50's pinup girl for John, who certainly got him aroused. She had tied her hair back in pigtails and was wearing shorts and a top, but continued to put on a mini G rated show for him.

John sat back growing more aroused by his wife, as he reached for the camera to snap a few shots of her. Somehow Lilly posed for a few photos; while flashing that dazzling smile he loved so much.

"You going to brag about this"?

He shook his head, while continuing to take more shots of her, "There for my eyes to see".

Lilly shook her head; "To keep you entertained between cases", while slowly running her hand down her leg, seeing John releasing a breath, "Or is this going to hoard by both Vera and Scotty"?

"Would I let them see pictures of you like this", was making Lilly start to up the ratings on it. However as she then pushed him back, capturing his lips while pushing herself against him; he moaned while his hands ran down her back feverishly.

Each of their kisses towards each other caused more love to blossom in their marriage, before Lilly pulled back watching as John eyed her. He knew that she was glowing with more beauty ever since having their daughter, just four months ago.

While Lilly got back to posing for him, John was eying every part of her body; including that of her long legs. As he then reached out he then felt the smooth skin; before feeling her straddling him; as his pants and her shorts then fell to the floor.

Lilly rocked herself up and down on him, hearing John moaning in pleasure. Not surprisingly, he then proceeded to lay her down on the bed; before climbing on top of her. While he slide in deep; she moaned, gasped while thrusting her hips hard against his.

His breathing grew heavier by the moment, while devouring her lips with his. As the two moved together in their bed of roses; Lilly knew at this moment she wouldn't be married to anyone in the world but him. Just moments after the earth had shook in the bed, the two lay there looking into each other's eyes.

Reaching up to moved away the tendril from her forehead; John could see a pair of two blue eyes staring back at him.

"Happy Anniversary Lil", his voice whispered softly while sealing her lips with a single kiss.

Lilly smiled softly, before seeing him pouring some water into a plastic wine glass. Her head shook in wonder, "Since when do you not drink around me"?

He then got up to put back on his pants, in between checking his phone which was a disguise for him to get out a small box from out of his sports jacket. While John was in the midst of doing that, Lilly had changed into a long white gown which made her feel sexy, but in a good way.

"Close your eyes", he whispered softly.

Doing what she was told, John then clasped something around her neck. Just moments after he instructed her to open them; Lilly caught sight of a tiny heart necklace with a touch of pink inside.

"The moment I saw you coming down to me, I knew you were mine", kissing her neck. Lilly watched through the reflection in the mirror; seeing just how much love there was shared between them as a couple.

Lilly then turned and captured his lips, "How about we recreate that kiss, which we shared a year ago". Starting out slowly their lips slowly came together, taking the time to cherish and feel each other before it grew deeper.

Pulling away softly, Lilly smiled, "That's the one, except this time I'm not feeling someone hiccupping inside of me".

"Little did we know that it would be our daughter Lil", still looking into each other eyes, "I'm glad I could give you one".

Her lips them formed a smile, before clinking her glass with him, "Happy Anniversary", as the two spent the rest of the night in a room full of romance. By the next morning, they returned home finding Scotty holding Amelia; while she continued drooling all over his grey hooded sweatshirt.

At that point; Lilly took her daughter into her arms while wiping it away from her mouth. Scotty watched how both her and John each kissing the smiling four month old. He could tell that Lilly was very happy in her marriage; but for himself he felt nervous about becoming a father to twins. Though now he was moving in with Kat; there was something different about both John and Lilly.

Upon seeing John holding Amelia in his arms, Scotty had to smile, "You make a better dad, which I would".

" Being a good one doesn't happen overnight Scotty, I've had twenty- eight years of being a dad so far" , trying to give Scotty a good piece of advice but found it hard to with a four month old in his arms. For the time being, John took Amelia upstairs for a changing while Lilly stayed downstairs straightening up after Scotty had left.

One thing she hated was the fact that her partner wasn't as neat and tidy as he claimed. For one thing, empty bottles lay on the counter while glasses piled up in the sink. Plus Lilly had discovered that Scotty had directly drunk out of the milk carton before putting it back.

When John came down he also saw it, "That surprise you Lil"?

"No", seeing the mess in the kitchen, "I hate to see what Kat has to deal with", before noticing that Amelia was now in a tiny pink dress. Sure enough she was turning into a Daddy's girl; but that wasn't such a bad thing.

While Lilly cleaned up after her pigpen partner, she scowled in frustration about the fact that her partner had to make a complete mess. To top it off; Lilly totally forgot that today she was needed over at Christina's place.

A hand then touched the small of her back, "Go I'll stay here and clean up", offered John, seeing Lilly taking Amelia out of his arms. Not long after she had left, he didn't exactly do what he had promised, instead headed over to Jefferies for a poker game.

Moments after arriving over at Christina's, she took couldn't take her eyes off of her little niece. However Christina liked seeing her older sister acting as a mother, as her hand rested on her stomach. Being pregnant had its ups and downs but she didn't like it as much as Lilly cherished her own pregnancy.

A few hours later, the sisters were speaking softly, "Ever think of where Dad went off to"? Asked Lilly.

Christina let out a sigh, "He probably doesn't think about us Lil", seeing a photo of her sister as a little girl holding onto their father's hand, "You still love him"?

"I do", whispered Lilly, "Always wondered where he ran off to", peering over at Amelia, "At least she'll grow up with one, John's already spoiling her rotten".

Her hand then slipped onto her sister's stomach, as the two rekindled stories from their childhood. It felt good to speak about those memories; especially when Christina pulled out a picture of Lilly being held in her father's arms.

At this point Lilly held back tears; while carefully studying the picture, "Why couldn't he have just stayed Chris, we would have had a better childhood"?

"You don't know that Lil", before looking at a photo of John holding Amelia, "I know that John isn't like Dad, he never abandoned his eldest daughter".

Lilly nodded knowing that what Christina was saying was true, "Do you think he even thinks about us", still wishing that she could see the face of her father again. However Christina then felt a certain kicking inside, "He's kicking again"?

"He", raising her eyebrows. Christina let out a breath, "I'm thinking of naming him Aiden, but I'm sure", knowing that she wasn't about to get married, not after her fiancé had dumped her. However she remained strong and was looking forward to motherhood, "I was him and Amelia to be close like us Lil, and we're family".

Lilly gave a small smile, knowing that this weekend it was just an all girls weekend. While John was left alone, he missed his moments with Amelia; hating to not be with her. However he knew that it was good that she was spending the weekend with her aunt. To him family matter, since John was heading on over to his eldest daughter's house to spend some time with both her and Sean.


	40. A rose petal falling

Somehow while the sisters spent the weekend together, John went golfing with Jefferies since he too needed a breather away from family. While there he started playing badly, as the other man also took notice.

"Family life getting to you John"?

John turned around, "I don't know Will, I thought the second time around was going to be different", letting out a sigh, "Being married again probably wasn't such a good idea", before turning around to try and tee off a ball.

He knew that he couldn't leave Lil or their daughter, but didn't know what else to do. Raising a baby wasn't something deep down that John truly had wanted; nor having a wife. With love came a reason, but somehow this domestic life wasn't something he really was feeling quite comfortable in. Though the two had been married for over a year, John felt that the romance between them was dying like the last rose during the fall.

Jefferies knew he had to prevent a perfectly good marriage from falling, "You can't just pull out of a marriage John, I know that Lil loves you a lot".

"I was just thinking of a trial separation, just so that I can clear my head".

"C'mon John, you know that would just hurt Lil. You got Amelia to think about also, she needs you as well".

John released a small breath, "I'm not thinking of divorcing her Will, just that I rushed into things. Getting married, while Lil was still pregnant", pausing to release a breath, "I should have just waited a little longer".

Jefferies couldn't full understand why John was acting the way he was, "What's really going on John, we're talking in private here".

"I don't know Will, I already feel like I'm screwing up in marriage. I just don't have the energy that I used to; hardly have enough to take care of Amelia".

As the two men finished a round, John remained secretive but upon coming home he let out a sigh knowing that in his heart he still loved Lilly. While flipping through a photo album that contained photos from their wedding date, John could see the happiness in his wife's eyes.

Though she was four months pregnant with their daughter at the time, he knew from the very first moment he had seen Lilly walking down to him in that dress; his heart was doing a triple flutter inside. Even to this very day, John knew he still felt the same way about her. Deep down this was an internal problem involving only him.

However John knew that he could leave neither Lilly nor Amelia for anything. Besides he knew he already was missing them, since they were still in Jersey with Christina. Keeping in mind about an all girls weekend, John then decided to clean up the house like promised; but ended up realizing that his thoughts were just plainly outrageous.

By the time that Lilly had gotten home, she found that there wasn't any sign of her husband around. To her that was typical since John had a habit of overworking. Though that was true on his side, John wasn't there do to any work. In fact he just sat there looking at picture that were on his desk; which featured one of Lilly as a bride, Amelia, and his grandson Sean.

The more John stared at pictures of his family, the more he couldn't decide where he had wanted to go in his own life. Sure he had a new family to come home to; each and every night; especially with such a beautiful wife like Lilly. Sitting back, John began to recount each trace of their relationship, starting at the very beginning.

By morning, he was still sitting there in the office, alone. When Lilly came into the bullpen, Jefferies looked at her, "John's been in there all night, won't say a word".

When she finally stepped into his office, he didn't bother to look up, " What's going on", seeing how her husband's stare was just blank, " John are you alright", touching his shoulder gently. The outcome came without any response; which was alarming to her.

Nevertheless, the way wasn't about to get any better. Especially now with a moody husband, that didn't come out of his office for cup of coffee or a bathroom break; which was worrying Lilly even more. In fact she knew now that John's behavior had only seemed to worsen.

Closing the door behind her, Lilly walked around before feeling the side of his neck. She could feel the steady pulsations underneath her finger but couldn't understand why John was stuck in such a deep funk.

Sitting down on his desk, she took his hand into hers, "Talk to me", seeing he exhaling a short breath instead, "Did something happen to you when I was away"?

"Just go Lil", finally answering her.

Lilly knew that her husband's mental state was more important than the cases right now, "John I can't, not when I see you in this way".

"Go home Rush, that's an order", saying it in his usual strict boss tone, "Don't me tell you that again", his eyes growing darker with anger.

Without a word, she left headquarters and went immediately to pick up their daughter from daycare. Once back at home; Lilly realized it might have stemmed from the weight that John had been putting on recently; or was it something deeper than that?

Whatever it was Lilly was determined to save her marriage, knowing that she needed him in her life and in their daughters as well.

As the days started passing, she couldn't take anymore of this silent treatment from her husband. For one thing he avoided speaking to her at work, but one night Lilly received a phone call from Jefferies that her husband was in the hospital due to having a heart attack. At the hospital she was relieved to find out that John had only suffered a minor one, which was brought on by stress.


	41. Gears now falling back into place

Upon coming into the room, Lilly heard the sound of a heart monitor that was currently now displaying her husband's heart rhythm. Though John was lying there asleep, she could a pair of nose prongs that were feeding him some air, but other than that he appeared to look fine. Instead Lilly took his hand into hers, knowing that she could have lost him forever.

Though his heart was still beating, she felt remorse of not trying to prevent this sooner. Being strong she then gently moved closer kissing his cheek, "I love you John, always have", she whispered. Her voice was now beyond that any tears could in fact; possibly fall.

Lilly knew that all this stress that John had been under lately took a heavy toll on him, but now regretted leaving him for the weekend. For now she sat there, for hours until John opened his eyes. The pain was still there but he was glad to see the face of his wife again. Without any use of words, he gently squeezed her hand while gasping for breath; this where the machines started to buzz with louder noises.

At this point Lilly was ushered out of the room, while the doctors worked on her husband. Standing in the hallway, she felt her whole world colliding. Deep down terrible thoughts raced through her mind; about possibly becoming a widow. The thought of that made her cry, but Lilly tried to keep it together knowing that she had to remain strong for John.

Just an hour later, Lilly's worst fears weren't about to come true any time soon. Besides John was clearly awake and alert while the two took each other's hand.

"I'm sorry", he managed to say between breathing in through a tube in his nose.

Lilly nodded, "You can let this stress build inside of you, it's not good", her voice now in a whisper, "I don't want to lose you".

He could see the watery tears falling out of her eyes, "I love you", managing to say before feeling more pain in his chest. Deep down John wanted also to tell Amelia those same three words, knowing that her life was very important to him. Had he died, he would have left his youngest daughter to grow up without him.

For now John felt Lilly's lips pressing down on his cheek, soothing his pain for a moment. She was the one person whom had stood by him through bad and good; but now remained supportive and loving. Perhaps he wasn't rushing into anything but in the end got both a new wife and daughter that meant everything to him.

Though no longer alone, he came to realize just moments after visiting hours were over, about the real reason as to why he fell in love with Lilly in the first place. The answer was simple; Love. It didn't matter about their age differences but what was inside. Amelia was conceived out of their eternal love for each other, but if Lilly wanted another baby; John wasn't going to say no.

Despite his recently heart attack; he was still thinking of adding on one more baby. For the time being, Amelia was their baby; their love, and joy. Without her in his life, John wouldn't feel this complete as he did now.

While lying there in his hospital bed, he regretted treating Lilly like that. After all she never deserved to be ignored or even chewed out. As the days passed, John started feeling better but was happy when Lilly was able to bring Amelia into the room.

Right away a smile crept onto his face, as he then kissed her cheek. Just as Amelia smiled at him, he also felt better now having her there.

"She still looks like you".

Lilly continued sitting with holding their daughter in her arms, "That's a bad thing", teasing him softly. John also laughed softly, "So what's your sister having"?

"A boy, somehow I can't see Chris raising one", as she then picked up Amelia, "At least I have my little girl".

He also couldn't believe that her sister was having a son, "I'm glad we didn't have one", his eyes meeting up with hers, "We're not having another one right now Lil".

"Wasn't even thinking about that, we already have a baby", seeing his hand gently stroking her cheek, "Soon the department will be having two more babies".

At this point, Amelia let out a large drool out of her mouth. It got onto the small towel that Lilly had draped over her shoulder. Though it was expected at her age, John didn't make a fuss since he knew all about that stage. Being already a father, he found that having another child seemed to be a lot easier than his first.

"Could just see the look on Scotty's face, when one of the twins does that", making the two laughs softly together. John let out a breath, "I got that all to look forward to, sounds like Will isn't happy with filling in for me again".

"Don't think about it, your health is more important that worrying so much about work".

He then slowly sat up; while his heart monitor displayed an increase in his rhythm, " I'm not going to retire Lil because of this", knowing just how much she missed him last time and also John couldn't live without working, " You did warm me about this".

Upon placing Amelia down in her stroller for a nap, Lilly then gently placed her hand on his chest; feeling his heartbeat. He knew that this was her worse fear; losing him for good.

"You sat with me all night, after I was shot. I knew I wasn't alone", looking over at Amelia, "I also got my wish to have her".

John then gently pulled her closer as the two shared a moment together before the door had opened, there Vera grinned. From behind him came Jefferies which then prompted Lilly to pull back, knowing that one of them would make a wisecrack about it.

"Playing Nurse Lil", grinned Vera?

Lilly glared at him, while Jefferies came over to shake John's hand, "You feeling better"?

"I'm fine", he responded, "So I hear that Scotty's been driving everyone crazy"?

Both Jefferies and Vera groaned; each wanting to kill then very nervous father. Between this, everyone knew that Scotty and Kat each loved each other; but pretended to hate one another at work. However the fact remained he even was starting to piss Lilly off as well.

From in the door way, Scotty stood there. He then came in wearing a grey hoodie complete with a pair of jeans. All in all he looked handsome; but at the same time said his hello before bending down to kiss Amelia. Though he was her uncle, Scotty felt a special connection to his little niece which was one made up of pure love.

At this point he looked up, "Kat would have been here, but she says she's too fat to move", releasing a breath.

"Probably because she has two fighting Valens kids inside of her", answered Vera whom cracked everyone up in the room. Even John chuckled while still watching Amelia asleep in her stroller, as Scotty then took notice, "You coming back to work boss"?

"Yeah Scotty I am, retiring isn't something I'm about to do".

Jefferies could see that Amelia was the apple of her father's eyes, judging by the way he was looking at her. Though John was lucky not to be in ICU, since his health seemed to improve, but this stress from work aided into him having this. It was good thing that he married Lilly, seeing how their love for each other helped.

Somehow Lilly shot Vera a look, not wanting anyone to mention work. John needed a break from this, so that it wouldn't put extra strain on his heart. However he seemed more interested in the recent games; which by all means was a good thing.

"Got any cute Nurses coming around, Boss"?

John shook his head, "No but I think you might have good chance of a date with one of them Nick", seeing the amusement on his detectives faces. When Amelia awoke crying, Scotty picked up her into his arms, "Be careful with her", warned John feeling a tad overprotective of her.

"Look who's the overprotective one", Scotty spoke back.

At this point, Lilly stopped any bickering that was to come, instead the guys then decided to leave, " Miss you at Jones Boss and you also Lil".

When they all left, Lilly also then decided to head out. She wanted John to rest as much as he could, but just moments after he lay back thinking about possibly getting tickets to baseball game. It wasn't for a guy's night out, but just with her and Amelia instead. He wanted to teach Amelia about it, but also make a memory with her as well.

Meanwhile, Lilly the caught Scotty shooting some hoops with Veronica at a park; from what she saw was him being a good father figure to her. Maybe love wasn't blind as one could put it; but something even deeper than that. Perhaps love changes people, especially when John was concerned. In her heart she knew there was always something about him that she loved.

However she had no clue about the three of them attending a baseball game together, would eventually lead up into something even bigger.


	42. A lovely little party

By the time the family of three was entering the stadium, both Kat and Scotty had welcome their twin son and daughter into the world just two months ago. Though he was thrilled about having kids, he wasn't as happy to be up all night with twin crying babies. Luckily, the two were able to work something out.

For both John and Lilly, they were glad that Amelia now seven months old wasn't like that. Now all decked out in a tiny baby sports outfit, her tiny smile was to be seen. As the two sat down to watch the game, Lilly could hear John telling their daughter about what was going on.

"Are you going to talk through this whole game", she asked while trying to focus on what team was now at bat. He didn't answer but instead resumed his mini lesson to Amelia on baseball; already John shared his love of sports with her. Though that didn't bother Lilly at the least, but when the Phillies hit a home run, the two watched it feeling the pulse of excitement in the air.

"You're not getting one", seeing that her husband was about get a hotdog, not wanting him to suffer another one. Though he wasn't obese, the fright of losing him was still very much evident in her mind. Right after coming home from the game later that night, John lay on his side peering into Lilly's.

He could tell that his recent heart attack had sent a massive bundle of nerves that were still pulsating through her whole body, " I'm not going anywhere", touching her cheek softly, " My heart's fine now". Somehow Lilly nodded softly but feared about even making love anymore; however she knew that it would be awhile before they could actually have sex.

"I'm not at all dying", pulling her closer to him. While Lilly heard the lulling sounds of his heart, she lay awake feeling safe in his arms. Though she knew that what he was saying was in fact true, Lilly continued to listen needing that sound to continue comforting her.

However by morning, Lilly had beaten him to work, seeing both Vera and Jefferies each yelling at each other since Vera had now became his roommate; ever since a pipe had burst; flooding out his entire apartment.

Sitting down with a mug of tea, she began working on the case some more. Then her phone rang, prompting her to drive to Jersey. Upon arriving Christina was lying on a bed, breathing harder. Lilly immediately took her hand, "Breathe Chris".

"I need the drugs Lil, NOW", as a sharp pain rippled throughout her entire body. Christina wasn't merely having a field day, but somehow the hours grew longer. Lilly could relate to that experience, but knew that her sister's pregnancy wasn't such a good one, plus the fact that she had gained too much weight.

'Don't push Chris", but was then interrupted, "Shut the hell up Lil", letting out another painful moan. Lilly knew that it was just the labor pains that were making her say those things, but at the same time remained supportive.

As her contractions grew stronger and closer, Christina couldn't take it any longer, "Get him out please", while Lilly wiped the sweat off of her forehead before feeling her sister squeezing all the pressure out of her hand.

Christina let out another scream, "What the hell is inside of me, a bowling ball"?

By the midnight, she was ready to deliver. However Lilly was tired plus having no feeling her left hand was no picnic indeed; " Push, softly instructing her.

With the doctor also couching her, Christina screamed and moaned while pushing. Just as she was about to lose it mentally; she then heard the sound of a newborn's first cry. Lilly was awed just by seeing her new nephew being born.

Upon her hand being released, Lilly could feel the blood rushing back into her hand. However she watched as Christina first held her son for the first time, now giving the new mother sometime alone; Lilly came out looking extremely worn.

Luckily John just happened to be there, as she then shared the news with him. He also was thrilled about her being an aunt, but then gently rubbed her hand, "You also squeezed my hand very tight"

"Don't compare how I was to Chris, she was far worse", as her head already pounded with a headache but when Lilly went back inside to see her new nephew, she could see just how maternal her little sister had become.

Christina was now sitting up in bed, as Lilly also sat down on there, "What's his name"?

"Matthew", whispering softly, while watching him sleeping softly on her chest. As the two sisters continue to watch the newest addition onto their family, they knew that they both needed to remain closer; since there was no one else left.

As the days passed, Lilly stayed to give Christina a hand with Matthew before returning back. Though the cases grew deeper with mysteries, she then found an invitation to the city's annual Christmas ball, which was coming up. Never in their relationship did neither Lilly nor John ever attend it, since neither of them really had a thing for it.

In fact when it was brought up John pretended that he didn't hear about it. In fact this pissed her off, especially how he'd act about this, "We never go, and don't say that you have forgotten how to love, I know you better than that now".

John continued reading up on the sports scores, until he saw that she wanted to go badly, "Lil I hate those kinds of things, you know that".

"All you will be doing is gossiping about cases and sports among other cops", making him stop what he was doing. When he had found of that she had already had signed them both up to go, he groaned trying to find a way out of it.

Lilly knew him all too well, "Don't even pull a thing about wanting to work, John", knowing how he would use that as an excuse.

During the weeks counting down to the ball, he groaned each and every single day. These type of parties weren't really his thing, by the time the night had finally had come, John winced as Lilly was fixing his sports coat, "Don't do this", warning him.

"I'm not a kid", reminding her.

She shot him a long look, "You certainly are acting like one", as John followed her down the stairs. After the Christina had arrived, along with Matthew; the two ended up fighting during the whole drive there. When arriving, the squad sat together at their table.

As usual both Kat and Scotty were at their usual bickering, while John and Lilly avoided each other's glances. Probably due to his own arrogance about even attending this party; however once Scotty made a stupid comment towards Kat, she immediately took off for the bathroom as Lilly trailed behind.

"How the hell did you even put up with him", scowled Kat while fixing her earring, "Scotty's one heck of a pain the ass".

Lilly sighed, " Try being married to one, "seeing how the other woman froze in terror knowing that Scotty probably would try and make a that move on her as well. However as much as Kat loved Scotty she also hated him as well, but upon returning John was speaking to other cops as usual.

As the music started to play, Scotty stood up looking right at Kat. She groaned but accepts his hand as the two danced together. While watching other couples, it didn't take very long for the ice to break between both John and Lilly.

Little did they know that this turn out to be a party that the two would never forget, but never speak of again due to a little fight later on?


	43. Christmas with some bantering

In their marriage, there were fights that the two would have, but never speak about again; this was one of them. Though Lilly was just plainly being stubborn, John was certainly used to it. As he stretched out on the bed, after being subjected to being at this party; until his eyes caught his wife undressing. He wanted to reach out and caress her white creamy skin.

Due to their fight, Lilly got into bed but slept with her back facing him. John sighed, fighting the temptations of wanting to caress, kiss, and be intimate with the woman he loved so much. When his wife was angry, she sure knew how to hold a grudge. With anger still in the air, John got up deciding to sleep downstairs.

While lying on the daybed, he somehow managed to remain awake. Like clockwork, his thinking was correct when he then spotted Lilly standing at the bedside.

"Couldn't sleep", he asked, seeing how her eyelids wanted to close but somehow couldn't.

Lilly let out a yawn, before feeling his hands at her hips, " _Your such a damn well good liar John_", realizing that he had so cleverly faked being shy when they had first met. His smile was a signature sign of the pain truth.

"You_ were too stubborn to realize", _came his response. She then leaned in closer, "You_ were fantasizing about being with me all along", _seeing how the lust in his eyes.

"_Guys got to have something to fantasize about, beside work_", he added while his hands played along the hem lines of her pajama pants. Without another word, John pulled her down in one motion; tasting every portion of Lilly's lips before letting his tongue dances around the insides.

Then in another motion, John flipped Lilly onto her back as he slowly began saturating her lips with his. A lustful moan slipped out from her mouth; as he leaned back looking directly into her eyes, " I still have more experience", quipping that comment.

John then proceeded to explore more of her body, while more noises came out of her mouth.

"I'm still better at it than you", her eyes now looking devilish with love. Those words were the last comments she could speak of, as their bodies rocked harder together. Each of their heartbeats grew stronger and faster by the moments; while every caress, nip and kiss of skin; made their connection a powerful one.

At last the waves had blown out like a tide, while their eyes continued to lock into each other's.

"Now why didn't I experience this whole side of you until now"?

John laughed softly, "There's a lot that you still don't know about me Lil", while still eying her naked body, "Always liked when you left a button open on your shirt".

"You're dirty old man", she admitted jokingly. He also chuckled as well, "I didn't stop me from loving you, did it"?

"No", before leaning over and devouring his lips again, this time making John breathe out even harder. Just about everything about his wife turned him on; even when the two heated up another round of passion. When it was all over, Lilly lay in his arms motionless.

A few weeks later, the two were already barking up a creek while John was trying to put up the lights. He already had half of the line without any working ones; but Lilly then snatched it out. While bantering back and forth, their daughter crawled up touching her father's leg.

It was amazing how at one moment, John would be furious but at the next turn into a loving father. She couldn't understand the reasons; but knew that her husband was full of secrets as well. One evening things started to get steamed up right before everyone had arrived.

With her fingers locked in the loops of his jeans, John found himself being pinned up against a kitchen counter. His cologne practically drove her nuts; but as he slowly nipped at her neck; tasting the scent of Lilly herself; John's heart almost literally jumped out of his chest.

The sound of Amelia's babbling suddenly broke their concentration on each other, as she crawled her way over to her mother. Upon picking her up into her arms, Lilly glanced over at her husband before heading several knocks at their front door. By the time that the whole squad had shown up, While Kat was bantering with both Scotty and Vera, as Lilly turned looking right up at John.

"And who was the one whom invited them", she questioned.

He shook his head, "We better get out there, before Kat kills both Scotty and Nick at the same time", taking a six pack of beer out into the living areas. Though the gathering was small and full of stories; Vera still wasn't letting it go about his tie getting cut off, in fact he kept on going on and on about it.

"Isn't it time you had yourself a girlfriend Nick", before Lilly then cut in", isn't about time you've learned to use a coaster John", sliding a coaster underneath his bottle of beer.

Scotty chuckled in amusement, "Getting a bit anal Lil", but as usual Kat also butted her two cents into it, "I can understand her reasoning, it's not like you even attempt to keep the house clean. Do not", pointing a finger directly at him, "Lie to me Scotty".

He shook his head, "I don't lie".

"Yeah right", groaned Kat as she sat there waiting for Lilly to come back downstairs. In the meantime, Jefferies seemed amused by all these comments, "Sounds like the ball and chain are working out for you John".

"Lil can be a pain the ass", before feeling her pinching him.

Her eyes looking directly at her, "So can you, mind If I elaborate some more"?

"Please", grin Scotty.

Lilly shot her partner a look, as John then pulled her down, " You getting back into work mode again"?

At the same time both of their eyes peered into each other's, knowing that they were indeed meant for each other in so many ways. When the party finally had ended; the two were left with just each other. On the night of Christmas Eve, Lilly's head was resting on John's chest, as they watched the lights illuminating from the tree in the dark.

Except for the usual noise outside, John heard nothing except the soft breathings coming from his wife. She also heard nothing, except counting the beats of his heart. Lilly knew that sound was the probably the most comforting thing in the world, to hear.

"How about we start trying for another baby; around March or April", tracing circles on his chest. John released a breath, "We didn't exactly try last time".

"You kind of just scrambled my eggs instead", her voice now whispering something into his ear. It caused him to moan softly, as John's dirty mind began to roll on inside of his mind, like a wheel turning.

Lilly watched seeing how romantic her husband could get, "You picturing some wild fantasies about me"?

"No", his lips brushing softly against her bottom lip. A soft moan flowed out, as his warm moist lips touched upon hers. As their kiss grew deeper and demanding, but somehow that's all it went. Even as another year came and went on by, the two somehow didn't add another baby, but when they started to try, they would find it wasn't that between work and home; both Lilly and John knew they had to relax while trying for to conceive one.


	44. Flashing forward

Even with the ovulation test kit, that Lilly had recently bought she knew now when she would be most fertile. However the problem was that the two were working so much, that they had enough neither energy nor time for sex at night. Somehow later that night; the two made time as their bodies began to rock back and forth.

Euphoria was high in the air, but John then quickly froze even though he was clearly enjoying the pleasure as well. As Lilly continued moving, not wanting to stop her body from feeling this. However she then felt him, pushing himself deeper into her. Her head fell back, while his lips ran across her chest feverishly.

Her heart raced intensely, but so was John's for that matter. Though he was continued to move along, not wanting to give up on them trying for another baby; but now John let out a moan feeling himself growing more and more aroused.

Not once did Lilly's eyes open, but she could hear his heavy pants getting heavier by the minute. Arching her back, her mouth let out a series of moans that she knew were turning him on. When his lips touched hers, it was electric causing Lilly's whole body to shake while she exploded with pleasure. However it didn't take John very long for his body to do the same.

Since then, the two started making time for this. Although, it was frustrating; they each found ways to make conceiving a fun thing. Just three months later, Amelia just happened to blurt out the new news to everyone in the squad.

"The baby", pointing to her mother's stomach, "Mommy's Tummy".

Lilly froze knowing that John had no clue about her pregnancy, but she wanted to tell him in a romantic kind of way. However Amelia was like a parrot; as she immediately raced up to her father. As John then scooped her up into his arms, she then repeated it.

When he realized that when his daughter was saying was true, his was absolutely priceless. In fact, without a word he put Amelia back down; as she ran back over to where Lilly was sitting. Her hands gently touching her mother's stomach, "Hey Baby", while giggling softly.

Practically everyone was amused by their boss's behavior towards, this good news. In fact John looked as if he was a deer caught in a tailgate, unable to escape. Scotty chuckled in amusement, while he took a sip of his coffee, "Amelia comes here", and he called out to his niece.

Then the bubbly blonde girl came over running up to Scotty. Being a good uncle, he then carried her out of the bullpen as they both headed down towards Geno's to pick up cheese steaks for the entire squad. While Scotty was out, Lilly slowly got up leading her husband back towards his office before shutting the door behind them.

"Amelia was with me when I went to the doctors, I thought I was miscarrying but I wasn't", taking in a breath, "She got all excited once she knew that there was a baby inside of me".

John sat back, still eying his wife's abdomen, "I heard you throwing up several times, knowing that was a symptom but wasn't sure", as Lilly placed a photograph of their unborn child down onto his desk. His eyes now seeing the picture; carefully studied it.

Then he then watched his wife exhale a breath," Did they see if it was a boy or a girl", teasing her. Lilly laughed softly, "Why do I suspect that you want a son, John"?

His hand then glided onto her stomach, "you want to find out this time"?

John smiled softly in agreement, but when they had came out of his office; Scotty had returned with a huge bag containing cheese steaks. Amelia was practically trying to rip open the bag; wanting hers. While Scotty was passing them out, Lilly automatically grabbed snatched it; before biting into the bread.

"What", wiping her mouth, while proceeding to spray on some cheese wiz?

The men chuckled, as Lilly paused to look up, "I'm pregnant", in between bites, "Baby's hungry".

Amelia somehow got up and went on over to her mother, "BABY", screaming loudly as John pulled her back, "you can't scream Amelia", speaking firmly but not in an angrily tone, "You need to eat".

Even Scotty noticed this as well, but it was Kat that spoke, "Need help opening juice boxes Boss", remembering how he once couldn't open one. Now John also caught on, "No, I think I've mastered it".

Lilly's hand remained on her stomach, knowing just how maternal it felt to have a little life inside of her. Though it would be their last child; since the two decided that two was in fact; enough; however she was relieved that it wasn't twins.

"Speaking of kids, I got to head over to the daycare", Kat said putting on her Jacket, "Last time you went there; Brent threw a fit".

"It was your idea to name him that", added Scotty causing her to groan, "Never letting that down".

Later on that night, John had to remain at the office; since he was due in court the next morning. Somehow the baby news was clearly on his mind, distracting him from really focusing. Though he was happy about the news, it felt weird to be having another baby. John was clearly felt comfortable having two daughters, one that was already grown; and another was about to turn three.

However John got through that beautifully, but as more roses were soon added; so did their ending love for each other. However by the time that Amelia had turned five; she was being tortured at school by some of the older kids; about having an older father.

So much so that she came home in tears, However John was extremely good to both of their daughters. As he then sat down beside Amelia, he could see the tears that were dripping down her cheek.

"I still play with you, it doesn't matter that I'm older".

Amelia cried softly, "They said you're going to die".

John could hear the fear mixing with sadness in her voice, "They are wrong, I'm not about to die anytime soon", kissing her cheek, "I still want to take you to that dance", referring to the father/ daughter dance that was coming up.

However that would prove to be another bad thing, when John had gotten into an argument with some of the dads there.


	45. Father daughter danced Ruined

On that night, Amelia walked down the stairs in a pink dress. Her hair was slightly curled but she was still the spitting image of Lilly all the way. Even John felt saddened to see that his little girl was indeed growing up, but upon arriving at her school he could see her own embarrassment of him being much older than all of the other dads.

"I'm still like every other dad in there", looking into her eyes, "How about we show them that I'm not as old as they think I am".

Amelia sniffled back; as the two walked into the cafeteria which was now a dance hall. Almost immediately one the boys from her class; begun teasing her. Still she made a face almost identical to that of her mothers, as John now saw one of the dads's coming over.

"You her gramps", a man known as Alex now stood there.

John wasn't about to let anything ruin his evening with his daughter," No I'm her dad", looking pretty firmly at the guy. However Alex glanced down at his own child, "Just too bad that you won't be around her sweet sixteen".

His face was one that wasn't kidding around, but knowing that this night was for both him and Amelia; instead John led his daughter onto the dance floor. Much to his own surprise he was able to keep up, but could see the tiny smile forming on her face. That didn't last very long, when Amelia went over to get some punch; one of the kids was still bulling her.

"Your dad dances funny, like an old man", was pushing Amelia against the wall.

"Stop it Mike", before she spat right at Mike, "He's my Daddy not yours".

However when the girl didn't stop, Amelia had ended up pushing her to the floor. At this point, one of the other kids ended up pulling her hair. While that was happening, John was also involved in an argument, over his wife.

"I'd personally screw that pale ghost wife of yours", before seeing his police badge, "What are you a fucking cop"?

John's eyes grew stern" Lietendent", as the other men backed off. They weren't now about to mess with him, but one in fact did; "He's probably retired guys, probably can't even shoot someone the right away; his aims off".

The man was sadly mistaken when John threw him against the wall, "Don't let your daughter, ever by my daughter again", his voice now growling, "And I'm not retired"

Outside Amelia sat down on the swings, shedding some more tears. She felt saddened that she didn't have a younger father, like her other friends. When John came out he also sat down beside her, "Nobody else would ever love you like I do, it doesn't matter how old I am. I'm still going to be here for you ".

Amelia cried softly, "You didn't fight them Daddy, like Uncle Scotty would".

"Uncle Scotty thinks he's a boxer; punching someone out isn't always a thing", wiping a tendril of hair away from her face, "I won't let anyone harm you ever".

"Not even Michelle", she asked thinking of her almost three year old sister.

John nodded softly, "You still want to go back in".

Amelia shook her head, still afraid to be bullied again by her classmates. Even John could understand her own fear of being picked on, "I still have a long time to live, I'm not about to enter heaven anytime soon".

"What if a gunman kills you", her lips slowly quivering in fear. However he gently held her hand, "I wouldn't let him hurt me", knowing that she feared losing him.

Somehow John had found out what exactly the kids at her school her taunting her about; but he knew he had to convince his daughter that things like that weren't true. While the cool air blew down harder, the two then sat on the stairs inside of the building instead.

"Dads come in a lot of different ages Amelia, but even Mommy didn't see my age when she fell in love with me".

Amelia looked up, "Why do I have a sister Mommy's age"?

"Janie is younger than Mommy, but that doesn't matter".

"It does Daddy", looking into his eyes, "Uncle Scotty plays with me more than you do, he even makes Mommy smile", slightly pouting.

John knew that Lilly had a deep friendship with Scotty, but her love for him was pretty strong. The two were just as in love as the day that had first met. It didn't matter anymore about his age, since love proved to be the strongest thing between them. However he could tell that Amelia wasn't convinced by just his words.

"Only I can get you tickets to both football and baseball games, I'll bet the other dads can't", which in fact was the truth, "How many of them go as much as we do".

Amelia's lips curled into a smile, "You have connections", sounding just like her mother. In fact it made John chuckle a bit from her response, "We don't have to stay here", understand about the whole thing.

Just as he was getting up, Amelia stood up in front of him, "Dance with me Daddy".

With the music playing from inside of the doors, the two danced together. Not once did John even care about actually going inside, for now he was happy with just being with his daughter. That moment was then ruined once again but the same two dads.

"Leave us alone", yelled Amelia, "He's my Daddy".

The men laughed in amusement, "You sure that you are the dad pops, she sure doesn't look like you".

John looked up, "I was there the moment she was conceived", before taking a hold of Amelia's hand. As the two walked out to his car, he continued ignoring the harassment from the fellow men. However while driving around; his eyes glanced up into the rearview mirror seeing how disappointed his daughter had become.

Even when they had returned home, Amelia avoided him and ran up to her room. However Lilly had noticed how worried her husband was; "What happened there tonight"?

"Got harassed due to my age, I think Amelia's embarrassed about having an older dad", sighed John as he removed his sports jacket, "Tried to help her, but I let her down".

She took his hand, "She know s you love her; can't picture anyone else being her dad but you", before heading upstairs to kiss both of his daughter's goodnight. After tucking in Michelle, he then moved over to Amelia whom was still lying there awake.

"I still wanted to dance with you", his voice now extremely soft.

"Why did you marry Mommy", she asked.

John sat down, "Cause I love her, still do", stroking her cheek, "I remember the day that you were born, first holding you in my arms".

Amelia blushed, before feeling him kissing her. Just as he was about to leave her then whispered, "I love you Daddy".

This made him turn back and look right at her, before hearing Michelle also saying that. Being a father meant the whole world to him; but had no idea how one parent teacher conference could led them both into having a series talk with their daughter.


	46. Bed Of Roses

Once the two had entered Amelia's classroom, for a parent/teacher conference; both were hoping that nothing couple in fact go possibly wrong. While listening to the teacher speaking about what their daughter was learning, Lilly glanced over at John whom seemed very interested in their daughter's academics.

Then the woman sat down in from of them, "Amelia's a very smart girl, social able but lately she has saying some alarming things; about having an older father, wanting a new one instead"

John nodded, "My wife and I have already spoken to her about that, I've already seen her being teased about it by her", worrying now about how his daughter was now thinking.

"I have also observed this as well, but clearly I think something else is troubling Amelia. Have there been any problems at home that could be causing this"?

The two knew nothing about why their daughter would be acting so abnormal, but Lilly then let out a breath. However John listened intently, as he heard that Amelia's grades were now starting to slip. She no longer did want to participate in class. Somehow he knew that by punishing she wasn't going to be the answer, especially if this had to do with him being an older dad.

Soon after the meeting, John could see just how disturbed Lilly had become, "Maybe it isn't me Lil, could be the fact that Amelia is getting constantly picked on. She doesn't deserve it", as he then went back into the classroom to speak with the teacher some more.

"I witnessed just how cruel her classmates have been towards her, this isn't good for Amelia to be not able to come to school to learn", he said firmly. The woman was clearly not a good teacher, whom probably cared less about her students, "It's a different generation".

John then interrupted, "Cut the bull, kids were getting picked on even in my day. This isn't just bulling, when it comes to my daughter not being able to even want to step foot instead of the school. What is really going on here", realizing that what the teacher had said was a complete lie, and that she was holding a grudge against Amelia for some stupid reason.

"You are to treat Amelia equally; I know that my daughter is very smart like her mother. I see her doing her homework every night and don't play that game and say that she doesn't. The phone calls are bogus; my wife is down the hall speaking to the principal".

Mrs. B, stood there still keeping her head down, "Quite frankly, she doesn't even ask for any help, when I give it to her".

John's eyes widened," How can I really believe what you are saying is true. You're a teacher now do your damn job"!!

Somehow after the whole conference, John took the rest of the afternoon off to spend some time with Amelia. He knew now that he had taught her how to be strong herself, but knew that her teacher really didn't have her best interests at heart.

"Am I bad Daddy", asked Amelia softly.

John shook his head, "No, but you can't be afraid to go to school".

"I'm not smart", the five year old pouted, and "My teacher said so".

He felt for his little girl a lot, "You are Amelia, Mommy and I know that you are", showing that he had confidence in her. She then walked up closer as John then held her close, while comforting the five year old, "I'm always going to love you no matter what".

Although it may have seemed strange to her, John didn't try to act youthful around her. Instead he remained the person that he had always been; but wanted Amelia to see him also as a role model rather than some dad with a series midlife crisis.

Somehow Lilly had walked in seeing how patient John was while he was teaching her how to spell. Though he was tough on suspects, but at home he played a very patient dad to both of their girls.

However later on, Lilly opened a photo album that displayed photos of both her and John; while they were dating and wedding photos. As she began teaching her daughter about what love was really about, the memories of when Lilly first felt her heart flowing with love came seeping in again. She remembered how at one point , how John though he had lost what it had felt like to be in love; but now saw that in fact he was quite capable of loving someone.

Flipping through more photos, Lilly could see just how happy she had felt just by being with someone she truly loved. Though it didn't matter; as now a hand gently touched her shoulder; shaking Lilly out of a very deep fantasy world. She now realized that it was just four days until their wedding; but knew that just by taking his hand, it would lead to a better life together, with him.

Even after the pale blonde bride, gently walked down the aisle, John felt his heart being gradually lifted up into the air. His breath was being slipped away, leaving a man that only had eyes for an angel named Lilly.

Later that night the two fell into their ever growing, bed of roses; while John stared into his blue eyes; observing just how precisely blue they were, " Kiss me John", came a voice of many whispers. However John was busying admiring his wife, as if she was a piece of fine art. Lilly could feel the warmth in his eyes, knowing that he also loved her.

As his lips crashed onto hers, their hearts began to each beat at the same rhythm. One by one, their love blossoms while each of their bodies moved slowly together. Within each moan, pant and touch came the blossoms of more love to grow between them. Even after the huge tidal wave of their orgasm had passed, John continued looking into her eyes.

His hand softly touched the side of her cheek, while another hand gently touched the middle of Lilly's swelling stomach knowing that this was the expression of their love.


End file.
